


Everybody Knows

by PrincessKillJoy



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Daddy Kink, Dubious Consent, Eventual Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Gentle Negan (Walking Dead), Good God, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Sorry, Jealous Negan (Walking Dead), Light Bondage, Loss of Virginity, Love Triangles, Masturbation, Negan (Walking Dead) is an automatic warning, Negan Being Negan (Walking Dead), No actually he is, Object Insertion, Past Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Possessive Negan (Walking Dead), Praise Kink, Protective Negan (Walking Dead), Resolved Sexual Tension, Rough Kissing, Rough Sex, Shower Sex, Size Kink, Spanking, This is about to get fucked up, Thoughts and Prayers please, Underage Drinking, Vaginal Fingering, Virginity Kink, What Have I Done, You Have Been Warned, cause why not?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-06
Updated: 2019-09-26
Packaged: 2020-06-22 04:32:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 56,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19659916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrincessKillJoy/pseuds/PrincessKillJoy
Summary: Everybody knows that Rayne Verloren will do anything for her little brother and everybody knows they are alone at the Sanctuary.Unfortunately for Rayne, everybody includes the very last person she wants to take notice of her willingness.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Ok... so this has been floating around in my head since I started binging The Walking Dead again. And when I say binging, I mainly mean watching it solely for Negan (because Jeffrey Dean Morgan is a beautiful man.). I can only set this up with that ^^;; 
> 
> NOW. This fic is going to have some... *ehem* explicit content (but that's why you're here right?), and I have no words nor apologies to brace you for that. Oh, and it's going to have some German input here and there because my innocent (for now) OC is half German. Just a disclaimer, I'm not a native German speaker and I'm not even going to begin to claim to be. I have used Google Translate for this, and if anything is wrong, I am very sorry. Any German phrases will have their respective translations (if Rayne doesn't do it in the story) at the end of every chapter. 
> 
> And of course...
> 
> DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANY CHARACTERS FROM WALKING DEAD (I wish I owned Negan though.). THEY BELONG TO THEIR RESPECTFUL OWNERS AND I'M NOT MAKING ANY PROFIT FROM THIS!!! (I do own Rayne and any other original characters mentioned, however. Please don't use them without my permission.)
> 
> With that said, please enjoy!

_Sissy…_

_Sissy, it's time to wake up!_

_Sissy!_

‘Alright already!" grumbled the lump under the blanket, a hand coming out to push the little boy who was already wide awake away, pulling herself out from under her warm hideaway. Her long hair hung loose in her face, tangled and no doubt looking like an overall hot mess given how she'd slept last night. With a sigh, she pushed it all out of her olive-skinned face, the same hand rubbing her eyes sleepily. Honestly, why did her father think 5 o'clock was a good time to always be awake?

‘Sissy!" came the voice of her little brother who was practically bouncing on the balls of his feet, still dressed in the pajamas they'd managed to scavenge two days ago, holding the flashlight that served as the only source of light at the moment and shining it right in her face, albeit on accident. Still, it was enough to make her growl irritably, bringing a hand up to shield her silver eyes. _And the Father of the Year award goes to the guy who thought it was a great idea to give a four-year-old a flashlight,_ her mind grumbled.

‘Enough already, Parker," she said, swinging her legs over the side of the bed. ‘I heard you the first three times."

‘But Sissy, Daddy said he needs you, right now!” She looked up at this, her almond-shaped eyes finally adjusting to the light when Parker finally put it on the side table.

‘Did he now?" she said, curiosity grabbing her. Despite her early morning grumpiness, she was still careful not to get too irritable with her little brother. At four years old, he was smaller than other kids his age but had the trademark family eyes- silver or gray, depending on how you were looking at them, black hair that hung in his eyes ( _I need to trim it back one day),_ and an angular face that resembled their mother's. Similar to Parker, she too had an angular face, however, her hair was a deep burgundy giving it an almost wine red appearance, something that she'd heard was quite rare. Even now she got asked if she had somehow managed to find a box of hair dye to get it such a beautiful shade. She scoffed at this. As if hair dye was important nowadays.

She never would admit it, but she believed the catalyst for the world ending the way it did was because of her mother Isabella's death. It was too coincidental: her mother had been the sweetest, most loving person that ever graced the Earth. She considered herself blessed to have called such a woman her mother, and cursed the disease called leukemia every day of robbing her of Isabella. And so when she finally passed- not even three weeks later- the world collapsed into one where the living were constantly on the move, constantly fighting the ever-present threat of the dead- Walkers. It was as though Mother Nature took offense to Isabella's untimely death and took her revenge against all by unleashing pure Hell.

Since then, it had been just her, Parker, and their father Corvus. Sure, they'd managed to build a small community of other survivors, but it still didn't replace all they'd lost along the way…

She shook her head, refusing to dwell on it. There was work to be done, and if her brother was right and Corvus was looking to go hunting today, then she had to get a move on. Slowly, she stretched and made herself get up, habitually making her bed before taking the little boy by the hand and leading him toward the makeshift closet on the other side of the room they shared with Corvus.

‘Let's get you dressed first," she said, raising Parker's shirt up and over his head, placing it in the handmade wicker basket and finding a warmer sweater for him to put on. Winter was fast approaching, and it was already easy for Parker to get sick. The very _last_ thing she wanted to get bitched out for was for not getting Parker dressed in warm clothes first thing in the morning. She slipped the sweater over his head, making a mental note to thank Cecily for knitting it for him.

All told it took a few minutes, but finally, she had Parker dressed in his sweater, a warm pair of jeans and his shoes, making sure that they were on the right feet this time. This child had a weird habit of waiting till she wasn't looking to put his shoes on wrong, something she was sure he did just to piss her off. Not that she would hold a grudge anyway.

‘Alright, go find Dad," she ordered, shooing him to the doorway. ‘I'll be out in a bit."

‘Okay, Sissy!" Parker yelled, skipping to the doorway to find Corvus. She smiled as he left and turned back to the closet to get dressed herself in her usual garb; black leggings that again had been made by Cecily and her crew of seamstresses (they were a godsend, for how else would they have the clothes they have now?), a grey t-shirt, dark green parka and her favorite brown boots. Finally, she made sure to grab her black fingerless gloves and put on her grey beanie before grabbing the rifle that leaned against the corner wall. Double-checking to make sure it was loaded and ready to go, she put her arm through the strap she'd fashioned from old bits of leather and cloth she'd found at a local store that hadn't yet been scavenged and headed into the main room that served as a kitchen, living room, and dining room.

When she lifted the curtain and walked through, Parker was already there alongside her father, already up and dressed nearly completely in black and brown save for the grey hat on his head. She took a moment, observing Corvus for a moment; though he was only fifty-seven at the most, Corvus looked much older with the lines around his eyes. His beard had changed from the magnificent burgundy red (as was his hair) to one that looked almost strawberry blond with age, the silver lining it here and there. Like his daughter and son, he too had silver eyes, ones that would have lit up at the sight of his wife when they happened upon her. Nowadays, they were dull and only regarded things with cool indifference, even his own children.

Sensing her staring at him, Corvus' eyes moved over to her.

‘You awake," he said in a thick German accent. ‘You well?"

‘ _Ja,_ father," she replied, shifting her rifle on her shoulder. ‘I'm perfectly fine. How are-"

‘Good, much to do," he interrupted, turning from her to her brother, whose arms were up for their father to pick him up. Corvus regarded his son cooly, then bent to pick him up much to the boy's delight. Parker snuggled up to his father, laying his head on his shoulder.

‘-you this morning," she grumbled, running her fingers through the ends of her hair irritably. Corvus, who'd been in the act of walking to the door, turned back to her.

‘What say you?" he asked. She wasn't surprised: though Corvus had been in the country for several years, his English was still not the best in the world. Sometimes he would mix up words, something her mother had helped him with. Nowadays, he'd resorted to short sentences, mostly lapsing into German when speaking to his children. A good thing they raised us to be bilingual, she thought. Still, it was strange to her that he could understand English perfectly, yet couldn't speak it as well…

‘I was just asking how you were this morning," she said. Her father cocked his head slightly, obviously not understanding. That or he was just feigning it. ‘I said how are-" she sighed exasperatedly, knowing there was no point in arguing. ‘ _Wie geht es dir heute morgen, Vater_?" His silver eyes stared deep into her eyes for a moment, and she could have sworn that she saw a ghost of a smile come to her father's lips. It was quickly replaced with his usual coolness as he turned away, carrying Parker to the door. She stared after him, suddenly questioning if she'd asked it in the right way. Her German could be a little off sometimes, after all.

‘Alright then," she said quietly, looking down at her boots. She started walking after him, not looking at Corvus.

‘ _Mir geht es gut, Kleiner_ ," he replied, taking her off guard. She looked up at him in surprise.

‘Huh?" Her father glanced at her over his shoulder, his silver eyes meeting the similar hues of his daughter.

‘I am well, my Rayne," he answered in English this time. With those words he opened the door and walked out their door, letting in the sounds of people already up and walking around. A small smile came to her lips as she continued to the door, noticing that he had stopped and was waiting for her.

‘Come, Rayne," he called to her. She nodded and hurried out the door, closing it behind her. She took a deep breath and looked around at the small community they'd built with the help of the other survivors they shared it with. Everyone looked to be up and walking around at this point; to her right were other similar dwellings like their own, and people were coming out to get to work. Directly in front of them was the dining lodge where they would hold meetings and sometimes community dinners during the summer when it was much too hot to cook in the small houses. Not far off was the clinic and general store, and right across to the left was the armory and the generators. There were already some people working on them, making Rayne wonder if they'd gone out again as per usual.

‘Rayne," he father called again. ‘Stop gawking and come."

‘Right behind you, dad!" Rayne called, following her father's voice towards where he was heading. Her way was lit by the lights that had been rigged up to serve as street lamps so to speak, passing some familiar faces along the way.

‘Good morning, Rayne!" Cecily called as she passed. ‘How do the pants and sweater fit?"

‘Like they were made just for us. Thanks again, Cecily!" Rayne answered with a smile.

‘Morning Rayne!" said Moses as he carried a box of tools towards the generators.

‘Morning!" She called as she caught up to her father, who had just set Parker down. He met her eyes as she approached, as did the person he was talking to. Rayne's heart skipped a beat, a shy smile coming to her face.

‘Morning Rayne," Trevor Miller, one of her father's salvagers called, smiling warmly at her.

‘Morning, Trevor," she replied, looking up at him through her lashes. It wasn't a secret that she had a thing for Trevor. How could she not? He was tall and handsome, with a brown beard on his face and dancing brown eyes that drew her in. Like most of the other salvagers, he was well built, something very much needed considering they were the ones always making what could be a treacherous journey up to their community. Her father cleared his throat, snapping Rayne out of her reverie.

‘You were saying," her father urged, silently giving Parker his hand when the child tugged on his sleeve. Trevor looked back at Corvus and sighed heavily.

‘The south generator's blown again," he said. ‘It's likely been down since last night. Thankfully we haven't had any Walkers try anything stupid, not that they know better, but the sounds of that thing blowing is surely going to catch their attention."

‘Hmm," her father considered, running a hand through his beard. ‘Not good, not good."

‘No sir," Trevor replied. ‘We've got Moses and Dom on it though. Shouldn't be long before it's up and running again. But that's the least of our concerns at the moment."

‘Oh?"

‘We've got a group of walkers heading towards the downed area. I'd say that's not a bad thing since they tend to get fried before they can get in, but this is too big of a group to ignore. We need to get people down there before all hell breaks loose."

‘Agreed," Corvus said, reaching a hand out for Rayne's gun. She gave him a strange look before handing it to him before he spoke again. ‘ _Sagen Sie ihm, er soll Coby und Dallas holen. Sie, Trevor und ich werden daran arbeiten, den Zaun zu sichern_."

‘He said to go get Coby and Dallas," Rayne translated for Trevor. ‘Then you four will get the fence secured."

‘ _Während wir daran arbeiten, die Dinge zu reparieren, brauchen wir unsere besten Läufer, um die Wanderer zu beschäftigen. Schick Sammy, Celeste und Han Woo raus_." Her father spoke again, doing an inspection on the rifle as he spoke. Rayne gave him a weird look, then translated.

‘Meanwhile, we need to keep the walkers busy. Send Sammy, Celeste, and Han Woo out to keep them off your backs until you get the fence fixed."

‘Got it," Trevor replied. ‘We'll be ready in five."

‘Make it two," Corvus ordered as Trevor ran off, shouting for the people Corvus asked for. Rayne looked at Trevor and then Corvus.

‘I'll get Parker somewhere safe and meet you guys there," She said, motioning for Parker to come to her. He came immediately, knowing what was happening.

‘ _Nein_ ," her father said, still focused on the rifle. ‘You stay."

‘What?" Rayne asked in shock, looking up at him. ‘Why?"

‘Keep Parker safe. You stay. We handle this."

‘No," Rayne argued. ‘I can do this. You need my help and I'm one of your best runners."

‘ _Nein_."

‘Yes."

‘ _Nein_ ," Corvus said again, his voice getting a hard edge to it. Rayne wasn't intimidated.

‘Yes! You know I'm the best shot of the bunch and I can get around-"

‘ _Nein_!" Corvus shouted, getting right in Rayne's face as she jumped in surprise, Parker also jerking in shock. ‘ _Ich sagte nein und das ist endgültig. Hören Sie auf, ein gereiztes Kind zu sein, und hören Sie auf Ihren Anführer_." Her silver eyes looked up at him, Parker crying in terror as she picked him up quickly, holding him to her as she tried to calm him. Corvus seemed taken aback to see his son cry, hanging on to his daughter like a cub to its mother. Rayne's own eyes were filling with tears as she cradled Parker, rocking him slowly. Corvus sighed, running a hand over his beard as he met Rayne's eyes.

‘I just want to help…" she said quietly. ‘Why won't you let me help?" He only observed her for a moment.

‘You help protect him." Corvus said softly, his voice dropping the ice finally. ‘He our resp… respo… _Wie sagt man dieses Wort_?"

‘Responsibility," Rayne said, annunciating each syllable much like how her mother would do the same for him.

‘That. What you said. He special, need you. Protect him. Stay." Rayne gave him a long stare, looking down at her boots again. Corvus sighed again, coming closer. ‘You too special. Can't lose you. Love too much." He put his hand on her cheek. ‘You know? Ja?" Rayne closed her eyes at the contact. For a split second, Rayne felt as though he was back to his old self, before her mom died, before-

‘We're all here, sir." Trevor called, Corvus dropping his hand causing Rayne to open her eyes and turn to face him. All of her friends- Coby, Dallas, Celeste, Han Woo, and Sammy- were gathered behind him, all of them with serious looks on their faces. Rayne blinked; she knew any situation with Walkers was serious, but given how they were all anxiously shifting around...

It was almost like they knew something she didn't. Especially Sammy, which was odd seeing as how he was usually the one that was always so sure of himself.

‘I filled everyone in. We're ready when you are." Trevor added.

‘Good, good. We move. Now." Corvus ordered. As the group went off to do their jobs, he looked back at Rayne one last time. ‘Stay safe. Will see you soon."

‘ _Ja_ , father." Rayne said, her voice full of longing as she watched after her friends. ‘Take care." Corvus acted as though he'd say something else, but instead turned to leave, hurrying after everyone ahead of him. Her silver eyes watched them disappear, almost forgetting Parker in her arms.

‘Sissy," he said, sniffling quietly. She turned her head.

‘What is it, Parker?"

‘Why doesn't Daddy love us anymore? Is it because of Mommy?" Rayne didn't say anything for a moment.

‘He does love us, Parker," she said, though a little voice inside protested against this. ‘He loves us very much, especially since he protects us."

‘Then why does he yell? Why does he leave?" Parker pressed.

‘I… I don't know, buddy," she replied. ‘I wish I did." A particularly cold wind blew at this, making Parker snuggle further against Rayne. ‘Let's get you out of the cold. Maybe there's some hot cocoa in the lodge left over."

‘Okay!" he said, easily placated as Rayne put him down and offered her hand. ‘Will there be cookies?"

‘I don't know about that," Rayne laughed, suddenly feeling more at ease being with her little brother. ‘But if not, we'll see if the store has any, alright?"

‘Yay!" Parker yipped with glee, pulling Rayne faster to the lodge. ‘Come on, sissy! Come on!"

‘Alright," Rayne said with a smile, walking faster to keep up. ‘Let's go."

* * *

True to her word, Rayne had indeed managed to find some hot chocolate that had been left over, likely a gift from Sammy knowing him. She smiled slightly at this; that man had a habit of leaving things around, specifically gum and other sweets that were in short supply, all for Rayne, though her being her, she liked to share with her little brother. He'd been doing that a lot recently, especially since her father had started leaving her behind instead of sending her out with the other runners.

Runners were just as important as the Salvagers in that they too went out and braved the treacherous hilly terrain, but rather than scavenge for supplies and the like, a runner's job was to serve as a distraction for Walkers, drawing them off the community's back and often serving as the first line of defense. This was Rayne's main job, but recently Corvus had started to keep her here, all under orders to take care of Parker rather than send him to the kind doctor at the clinic or to Cecily who always loved caring for the little one. Rayne wondered if it was because of the strange group he told her he encountered some time ago, but she didn't think much about it as she sat back in her seat, taking a long sip of her hot chocolate as Parker sat before her eating away at his breakfast.

Her earlier heartbreak went away as she watched Parker happily color away on a napkin with a crayon he'd had stashed in his jacket ( _This kid is a walking treasure chest of stuff_.) and taking bites of his oatmeal in-between coloring. She'd thought about going to grab her own art supplies from their house and to teach Parker a little watercolor, but she chose against it. Her father had made it clear that art may have been her major in college, but it wasn't useful to the community. It was a distraction, and a dangerous one too in his eyes. Rayne had so far been lucky to hide the meager art supplies she'd found on their last outing to a nearby town, knowing full well her father would lose it over them and likely destroy it all. But seeing little Parker drawing away without a care in the world, smiling as always…

Maybe she could convince him it was a good idea to bring some kind of hobby into the community, something to brighten everyone's day with. God knew they could use some smiles around here once in a while.

‘What's that, Parker?" She asked, smiling as her brother finished his drawing and proudly presented it to Rayne.

‘It's you and me, sissy!" he said with a huge smile. Rayne looked at the green-colored drawing, seeing a big stick figure holding hands with a smaller one. It was a typical kid's drawing, sure, but it was something that made her smile anyways. How he could remain so happy and innocent with the world the way it was Rayne would never know. Even when she was having a shitty day like today, Parker still knew how to make her smile.

Her smile faded however when she heard shouting outside.

‘That's weird," She said out loud, more to herself than to anyone. Parker, sensing something different in his sister's demeanor as she stood up, looking out one of the lodge windows.

‘Sissy?" he asked, coming beside her. ‘Is it Daddy?" Rayne motioned for him to be quiet, relieved when the child did so without an argument. She watched carefully, noticing that there was a group of people gathering. It was difficult to see, but she could have sworn she saw her father standing out there talking to someone she'd never seen before…

‘Rayne!" came a familiar voice, the sounds of someone running in through the back door taking her by surprise. 'Rayne, where are you?" Rayne turned to him in surprise, instinctively grabbing Parker and moving him behind her. Realizing who it was, she calmed down.

‘Sammy? What are you doing here? I thought you had-"

‘There's no time for that!" Sammy shouted, grabbing both her and Parker and dragging them away from the windows. ‘We have a problem."

‘Did the walkers get in?" Rayne asked. ‘I told Dad I should have gone with you!"

‘Rayne, it's not the walkers." Sammy continued. ‘It's something worse- it's that group from a month ago. They're back." Rayne blinked in surprise. She had remembered there being a strange group of people that had come to the community gates, wanting to talk to her father, but hadn't heard much of what they had wanted, much less about where they had come from. Whoever they were, they had put fear in her father and the others, likely threatening them given how everyone looked afterward. The whole community was on high alert for almost two weeks before everything went back to normal after that. It had been so long ago now since the strange group had been there that they had forgotten.

And now they were here.

‘What do they want?" Rayne asked.

‘More than we can possibly give." Sammy explained. ‘They've brought guns and a whole damn army it looks like and… it just doesn't look good right now." He stopped, running a hand through his brown hair before coming back to her and putting his hands on her shoulders. ‘Listen, grab Parker and come with me. We need to be ready to move any minute. I don't know what they're planning, but they don't look friendly and I'm not taking that chance." Rayne nodded and picked up Parker, holding him close.

‘Stay quiet, alright?" she told him. ‘Just hold onto me and stay quiet." Parker nodded silently, hanging onto Rayne's neck tightly as she followed Sammy out the back, both of them staying low to avoid drawing too much attention. Slowly, very slowly, they walked around the back of the building, uses the bushes for cover before Sammy stopped her, holding out a hand as they both peered around the general store to see what was happening. Rayne' breath caught in her throat at the sight.

There, right before her, were all her friends and father, all of them having been forced down to their knees before another man and several others, every single one of them armed with guns. The man before her father and friends, however, wasn't holding a gun. Instead, in his hands, he held a baseball bat. He was tall, much taller than her father by the looks of things, though she wasn't sure if that was because he was far away or not. His black hair was slicked back neatly, and a salt and pepper beard stretched across his face making her wonder if he was the same age as her father. His clothes looked much better than the meager ones that had been sewn for everyone; a leather jacket, red scarf, dark gray pants, and black boots. He was currently standing in front of her father, the bat laid across his right shoulder.

‘I'd like to think that after I sent some of my people here a while ago that you would have gotten the message, Corvus," he began, his voice loud enough for all to hear him. ‘I was even generous enough to give you plenty of time to think about what it is I'm offering. But instead of letting my people in, you pulled out guns and sent them running." He stared down at Corvus. 'Not cool. Not fucking cool, not even in the slightest. You have no idea how not fucking cool that shit is."

‘We are not interested in what you have." Corvus shot back, speaking much clearer English than she'd ever heard before. ‘You sent men with guns to our home. What we supposed to do?" The man in the leather jacket didn't seem fazed.

‘What you're supposed to do is give me an answer. And I'm not leaving until I get one. Now in case you've forgotten what my little message boy said, I'm going to give you a mighty big nasty pill to swallow. But swallow it you most certainly motherfucking will," he said, his booming voice making Parker shake in her arms.

‘Who is that guy, Sammy?" she asked, keeping her voice low.

‘Negan." Sammy replied, taking one of her hands in his and holding it tightly. ‘I overheard some of his men call him that. It was right before they grabbed your dad and the others." Rayne looked back at the man called Negan, listening to him talk about what he wanted.

‘You can make, scavenge, steal, whatever you have to do, but you're going to give me half your shit." Negan continued. ‘And if you put up a fight, it's just going to get fucking harder for you. I'm a reasonable guy, but you've pushed too many buttons with this indecisive bullshit and putting my people on the run. So tell me now; yes or no?" Corvus didn't answer him. ‘What was that? I didn't quite catch that." Still nothing. Even from this far away, Rayne could tell that Negan was getting increasingly angry. ‘Alright, since we want to do the silent treatment, I'll put it this way." He pointed the bat at Coby. ‘Grab that one for me." On cue two men grabbed Coby and brought him forward, keeping him on his knees. Negan looked back at her father, a smile coming across his face as he put the bat near Corvus' face.

‘This beautiful lady here? This is Lucille, and she is awesome!" he said with glee. ‘And Lucille doesn't like it when you don't speak when you're spoken to." Negan laughed at this, backing up till he was right beside Coby. ‘I don't want to kill you people, I want to make that very clear. I want you to work for me. I want you to provide for me and you can't do any of that if you're fucking dead. But if you're gonna keep playing this fucking game of you not understanding a goddamn bit of English despite you just fucking now talking in it, I'm going to have to start bashing in skulls." Rayne gasped, a hand coming to her mouth as Sammy pulled her and Parker close.

‘Say something, Dad! Please say something," Rayne whispered, squeezing Parker carefully as the boy cowered against the two of them. Corvus said nothing.

‘Alright then," Negan said, bringing Lucille to the front of him. ‘Anyone moves, anyone says anything, cut a finger off and feed it to the German asshole and then we'll start. You can blink, you can breathe, you can cry. Hell, you're all gonna be doing some of that." With those words, Negan brought Lucille down over Coby's head, blood spurting as he brought Lucille back up. Coby hit the ground in an instant, a look of shock on his face. Rayne barely caught the scream that wanted to come out, Sammy holding onto her tighter to shield Parker from the sight.

‘Stay quiet," he said. ‘We can't let them find us."

‘Sissy," Parker quietly cried. ‘Sissy, I'm scared."

‘Shh," Rayne soothed, tears in her eyes as she watched Negan continue to bring Lucille down on Coby's head over and over again. Her stomach lurched at the sight, any words she may have mustered melting away like snow.

‘Oh my goodness," Negan said, finally stopping his assault when Coby's head was nothing more than a bloody pulp. ‘Look at this!" he laughed heartily as though this was the funniest thing he'd ever seen. The people before him, as well as the rest of the community that had gathered, were all crying out in disbelief.

But no one dared move.

And no one dared say anything.

‘Now," Negan said, turning his attention back to her father. ‘What was it you were about to tell me… was it a yes, or a no?" Corvus, too in shock to muster anything, remained quiet.

‘You idiot," Rayne whispered, realizing what was going to happen. Once again, Negan chose a person, this time Celeste who received the same treatment after she tried to pull a knife on Negan.

‘You fucking pussy," Negan had declared after Celeste was dead. ‘You made me kill a smoking hot girl! And you still ain't gonna tell me shit?"

Dallas came next.

Han Woo followed.

When it came to Trevor, it took everything in Rayne not run out, to beg for mercy. But Sammy held her back, covering her eyes just as Lucille claimed his life too.

‘Goddamn it, Dad!" Rayne cried, muffling her tears in Sammy's chest. ‘Just tell him yes and stop this… please…"

‘You ain't got no more friends beside you, Corvus," Negan said aloud, a smile on his face. ‘And you're still looking at me the same damn way." He came closer. ‘Do you not get it even now, old man? I just bashed in the skulls of your favorite people and you are not even fazed! You must not have cared about any of your people. That is some fucked up shit!" Still, there was no answer from Corvus who knelt stoically, staring Negan in the eyes. Whatever joviality Negan may have had by now was long gone. He stormed over to her father, Lucille just inches away. Rayne gasped loud this time.

‘No…" She said, putting Parker down.

‘Rayne, what are you doing?" Sammy hissed.

‘Sissy?" the little one asked. Negan moved Lucille closer, and at that point, Rayne had had enough. She bolted from her hiding spot, breaking free of Sammy and charging at her father.

‘Motherfucker, if you don't say a goddamn word, I'll-"

‘No!" Rayne screamed, pushing her father back and putting herself between him and Lucille. Negan froze as he looked at her, her father also staring at her in shock. ‘Just fucking stop!" His hazel eyes met her silvers, clearly taken off guard at her appearing out of nowhere.

‘Rayne, what you doing?" her father hissed. She glared at him.

‘Saving your life unlike what you did for the others," she hissed, looking back at Negan. ‘You've made your point. You can stop killing innocent people now." Negan stepped back, an amused look on his face as he ran a hand through his beard, taking in her appearance. ‘English isn't my dad's first language. Why else do you think he isn't answering you?" Negan just smiled at this.

‘He can't speak good English?" he repeated, looking in the direction of another man. ‘Simon, when you first talked to this shitbag, did he speak English to you?" The man he introduced as Simon stepped forward.

‘Oh yeah," he answered. ‘Perfect English. Broken up, but enough to get the gist of it." Negan looked back at her.

‘And he spoke perfect English just a few minutes ago. So we've established that he can speak English," Negan continued. ‘Now I want a yes or no, right fucking now." Her father looked from Negan to Rayne, still clearly shocked by her showing up.

‘ _Ja_ or _Nein_?" Rayne asked. ‘ _Sag ihm einfach, was er hören muss und hör auf damit. Bitte, Papa._ "

Corvus looked at Rayne for a long moment.

‘ _Wir haben nicht die Ressourcen, die er will. Wie kann ich ihm antworten, wenn wir das Glück haben, das zu haben, was wir tun_?" Corvus said. Negan merely growled in annoyance.

‘English, motherfucker!" He said. He looked at Rayne. ‘What the fuck did he just say?"

‘He said we don't have the resources you want. He can't give you an answer because we're fortunate to have what we do." Rayne replied coldly. ‘In short, you're asking for too much."

‘Then like I said before, you can make, steal or scavenge it all and everything will even out sooner or later," Negan replied irritably. He pointed Lucille at her father. ‘Now tell him in whatever he's speaking that if he doesn't give me an answer I'll bash in his head." He paused, looking Rayne up and down one more time, the wheels in his head obviously turning. ‘Actually… scratch that. If he doesn't give me an answer in the next five fucking seconds of you asking him, then I'll just take everything instead… including you." Rayne gasped in surprise. ‘Clocks ticking, darling," he said with a sadistic grin. 'Unless you'd rather come with me either way." Rayne merely gave him a disgusted look, noticing that Sammy was slowly creeping out from behind the bushes with Parker close by looking as though he was edging to one of the nearby cars.

‘ _Was ist das, Rayne? Was hat er gesagt_?" her father asked. Rayne swallowed hard.

‘ _Papa, wenn du ihm keine Antwort gibst, wird er alles wegnehmen. Er wird alles mitnehmen, auch mich_!" Rayne said. Her father's eyes went wide.

‘Time's up!" Negan said, swinging Lucille back and forth, blood splashing onto her and her father. ‘What's it gonna be, Corvus?" Corvus was silent, clearly torn. Negan took notice right away. ‘Have it your way." He looked back at his men. ‘Search the fucking place. Grab everything that looks valuable and load it up." His hazel eyes looked back at Rayne as a grin came to his face.

‘Including this one."

Rayne shrunk back at his words, jerking away when she felt her arms being grabbed.

'Get the fuck off of me!" She said, glaring at the men who dared to touch her. When they ignored her and grabbed her again, Rayne's fist drew back and collided with the nose of the man to her right, the other too stunned to notice her running off.

At least, that was the plan before something hit her in the head.

'Fuck," she grumbled, her vision swimming as she struggled back to her feet. She was immediately forced right back down by a foot in her back, a gun being aimed right at her head. Rayne's silver eyes moved to look behind her, shock filling her as she met the eyes of her attacker.

'I'm sorry Rayne," Sammy said sorrowfully, aiming his side-arm at her. 'I didn't want it to be this way. Rayne said nothing, her mouth wide open in shock.

'You... you set us up! You son of a bitch, you set us-"

The world went black before she could finish.


	2. Five Months Later

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I want to thank everyone who has commented and left kudos on this work. It really means a lot that people are enjoying the story so far! =D Please keep them coming! 
> 
> Second, I've had people ask just when this story takes place in TWD. To be honest... I'm not really sure ^^;; When I write something out, I usually look for a point in time when there's not a lot of action going on to keep the attention on the story's plot, so if I had to guess, I'd say this is awhile before Rick comes along. I know at some point I'll be bringing that crew in, but for now I'm just going to keep the attention on Rayne and Parker.

Silver eyes blinked several times as Rayne came back to the world, a world she wanted no part of. It was surprising to her that she was able to recall that day in perfect clarity even after months it seemed. Five months if memory served right, not that she was able to really tell what month it even was anymore. Since then, her mind was focused on learning what she could about her new… home, if you could call it that.

Those who had come with them to the place called the Sanctuary- or those who’d likely seen what would happen to them if they didn’t comply with Negan’s demands and had followed purely out of survival- told her that the community she once called home was ransacked after Rayne and Parker had been taken away. Her father, likely too in shock to do much, had done nothing to stop him, only remained where he was until they were gone. What had become of him, Rayne didn’t know. She didn’t want to know at this point.

Her silver eyes looked over to where Parker was, seeing that he was still fast asleep on the cot next to hers, surrounded by several other people who were sleeping. Rayne sighed quietly. She knew she should be asleep, but she couldn’t, not when her mind was wandering the way it was.

When she’d come to, she and the others from their community had been assigned jobs; two of the four men that had come were taken to someplace called the Hole, likely to be turned into soldiers by the sounds of things. The other two men had tried to run off with their wives after seeing what happened to the other men and… well, Negan saw to their respective endings. When it came to Rayne, it had been a toss-up. She had experience in the field, enough that Simon, one of the men who’d come on that fateful day to her community, was more than willing to take her on as a Savior, but Rayne did not. She didn’t want to take part in going to communities to force them into submission, to take away their hard-earned possessions. And so, it was instead decided that she work the gardens, seeing that as the second-best thing. Rayne didn’t mind working outside. She liked being outdoors, and besides, she’d gotten plenty of experience working in the fields back home with Sam-

No.

She stopped herself there, refusing to think of the traitor that landed her and Parker here.

As for Parker, when Rayne would go out to work, he’d be sent along with the other children to another part of the Sanctuary likely in what was supposed to be a makeshift daycare judging by what Parker told her. He was all smiles being with children his age and had even made friends with them. She smiled slightly; it was good to see that he at least was adjusting.

Rayne, on the other hand…

Rayne would be a liar to say that she was adjusting just as well. Every day was the same mind-numbing routine: up in the early morning hours to wash her face and get Parker ready for his “school” as Parker called it, grab something quick from the commissary food line for him to have for a snack before dropping him off with some older lady and heading straight to the gardens to tend to the plants and other crops until noon or whenever they saw fit to give everyone a break. After work, she’d drag herself to the medium-sized room to pick up Parker, bring him back to the commissary line for dinner, then to their cots for the rest of the night until they were too tired to carry on.

Rayne cringed at the thought of the commissary lines. Everything they needed had to be bought with points, a harsh reminder that they weren’t given shelter for free. When it became obvious that it was going to be an uphill battle getting enough points for two, Rayne decided that she wouldn’t spend anything on herself until she knew that Parker was taken care of. She’d only take care of herself when she knew Parker had had a decent meal (often just an apple, juice, and some cookies if they were lucky, and a protein bar if not.) and had clean clothes. She’d go without eating for days just to make sure that he had enough to eat, would share her showers with him just to make sure that they were both as clean as possible. Rayne even had gone so far as to start putting back anything she was given for lunch- a granola bar and a bottle of water- just for Parker.

Everything for Parker.

Her ears heard a cough and instantly her head snapped to Parker. Sure enough, he was coughing again. She got up from her perch near the window she’d been sitting at and hurried to him as quietly as possible. Parker had been coughing like this for the past week or so, even when a kind lady had given him some cough medicine though Rayne insisted that she save her points. But nothing seemed to be helping him.

‘Easy Parker,” Rayne soothed when the little boy woke up from his slumber, tears forming in his little eyes. ‘It’s ok, Sissy’s here.”

‘I don’t feel good, Sissy,” he said quietly, snuggling close to her as she crouched beside him. Rayne frowned and put the back of her hand to his forehead, gasping quietly. He was burning up! _No, no, no,_ she thought, biting her lower lip. This wasn’t good… Rayne had been lucky so far to have kept him healthy despite being around so many other people but now that he was running a fever…

‘It’s ok, Parker,” she said, easing him back down. ‘Try to rest, ok? I’ll see if I can find anything to help your cough.” Parker nodded and laid down, still coughing away. Rayne hurried back to her cot and pulled out the box that held their meager belongings, digging through it frantically. ‘Come on, come on,” she whispered. ‘I know I had some more medicine in here.” Her panic continued to grow as she rummaged more, trying her best not to disturb the other people around her. This was the last thing they needed. She was already fortunate to have what points they did and if she had to include medicine in their already tight budget…

‘Fuck,” she hissed, not able to find it. Tears formed despite her best efforts to banish them. ‘Fuck.”

‘You ok?” A familiar voice asked. Rayne jumped in surprise and looked to her right, only to look away immediately.

‘What do you want?” she growled, refusing to meet said person’s stare. She heard him sigh and crouch down.

‘I just wanted to come and see you,” Sammy said, shifting his rifle on his back. ‘I wanted to talk-”

‘About what, Sammy?” Rayne interrupted, keeping her voice down. ‘What is there to talk about?” Sammy flinched at her words, his brown hair falling into his brown eyes before he moved it away. She glanced at him sideways, noting that he was wearing a dark brown shirt and pants, his black boots mere inches from her. He rested his forearms on his bent left knee as his right was folded behind him. In the past, she would have been happy to see him. Now she just felt nauseated.

‘Well, for one, there’s Parker,” he began, moving his head towards him. ‘How’s he doing?”

‘Fine,” Rayne said, hoping he’d get the picture.

‘Doesn’t sound fine if you don’t mind me saying that,” Sammy added. ‘He’s got that bad cough again, worse than I’ve heard it in a long time. It’s not his autoimmune disorder rearing its ugly head, is it?”

‘What does it matter to you? What does anything having to do with me and Parker have to do with you?”

‘Rayne,” Sammy sighed. ‘Look, I know what I did. I know it seems like I betrayed you but… dammit, this wasn’t supposed to happen. You guys weren’t supposed to be taken away… that’s why I wanted to run away with you.”

‘Well it did happen like that, and now our friends are dead because of you,” Rayne argued, going back to rummaging through the box, looking for a way out of this conversation. ‘And yes, you did betray us. We were best friends for God’s sake. Childhood friends at that. Our moms were best friends… hell, my mom even called you her son!” Rayne sighed, trying to keep herself from blowing up and waking up everyone in the near vicinity. ‘We trusted you, Sammy. We trusted you and treated you like family and you went behind our backs and brought someone terrible to our home.” She looked him dead in the eyes. ‘So, what did you get, huh? What did you get for doing all that?” Sammy didn’t answer her, only looked away. ‘I see.”

‘Regret,” he finally said when Rayne turned away. She spared him another sideways glance.

‘What?”

‘You asked me what I got for doing all that… a lifetime of regret.” Sammy replied, sitting down beside her quietly. ‘You and I have been friends for a long time. Your father took me in last year when you found me in the woods, almost dead. You sheltered me and got me back on my feet when the guys here just left me behind…” At Rayne’s confused stare, he elaborated. ‘I had ended up here with a few other people, not long after Negan took this place. I’d… I’d thought that I was alone, so I stayed here and became a Savior. But when I heard about a northern community run by a German guy, I thought it was worth a chance to see who it was. I wanted to see if you’d made it at least… but I didn’t know that Negan and Simon knew about it too and was going to take it as an outpost…”

‘So, you lied to us is what you’re saying,” Rayne said. Sammy didn’t answer her. ‘You don’t need to say anything. I knew something was up when you were acting weird that day, and I knew something wasn’t adding up when we found you in the woods. Just for a moment… I guess I was hoping I was just being paranoid.”

‘I never wanted to hurt anyone Rayne,” Sammy elucidated. ‘I tried to get you and Parker out of there before Negan showed up.”

‘Well you didn’t,” she snapped. ‘You just-” Her head turned towards Parker when a particularly rough bout of coughing spewed from him. She hurried back to his side, holding him until it passed. Sammy came closer too, putting the back of his hand on Parker’s sweaty forehead.

‘Rayne, he’s burning up.” Rayne cast him another sideways stare.

‘No shit,” she answered, pulling Parker into her lap and rocking him soothingly.

‘He needs something for that cough and his fever,” Sammy said, ignoring the barb. ‘I can go get it for you-”

‘No,” Rayne answered. ‘Don’t try to pretend you care now. Don’t try to make up for the past.”

‘I do care, Rayne,” Sammy whispered back. ‘Why else do you think I’m over here?” Rayne acted as though she’d say something but closed her mouth. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. They were silent until he put something beside Rayne. ‘Here, take this.” She looked at him and then the little black bag he placed next to her suspiciously. ‘It’s not much, but it should be enough to last you guys for a while. Don’t think I haven’t seen how you’ve been neglecting yourself.” Rayne started to protest before he cut her off. ‘Now’s not the time to be proud and stubborn, Rayne. I can’t change what I did, but I can at least atone for it by helping you now and then.” Sammy stood up after this, re-shouldering his weapon.

‘Sammy,” Rayne called as he started to walk away. Sensing something new in her voice, Sammy looked back at her. She hesitated and, despite her anger, finally spoke. ‘Thank you.” Sammy smiled at her softly.

‘Don’t worry about it,” he muttered. ‘See you around, Rayne.” With that, he disappeared into the darkness like he was never there, likely to resume whatever it was he was doing. Rayne watched him for a moment, then put Parker back onto his cot when the boy fell into an uneasy sleep to look inside the bag. Her jaw dropped slightly at the contents:

Inside was two bottles of cough medicine, some anti-inflammatory pills, water, protein bars, a coloring book and crayons for Parker, and a few other food items. Nothing much, just like Sammy said, but it was enough to get them through at least for a week. She closed her eyes, not realizing that when she did, tears fell down her cheeks. Damn that man… damn him for still caring, even though she hated him for taking part in the raid on her community. Surely, he went through some trouble for this, for why else would he have come at night?

Whatever the case, Rayne wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth; she returned to her cot and pulled out the box to deposit all the new items inside with the exceptions of the cough medicine. Parker was asleep now, but she knew that if that cough was anything like the ones he’d been having before, he’d wake up again. She looked back over at him, worry on her face.

_Get better soon, little guy,_ she silently said, laying down on her own cot and turning so that she was facing him. _I’ll be right here if you need me._ With that thought, Rayne put one arm over Parker and closed her eyes, falling into a dreamless sleep...

‘Hey, get up,” a gruff voice said, jolting Rayne awake. ‘Time to get your ass to work.” Her silver eyes looked up, seeing the tall black man kicking at her cot to get her awake. Rayne sat up as he stepped back, moving over to the other people who’d not yet roused from their slumber. She looked out to the window, seeing that it was starting to get light out. _That's just my luck right when I get to sleep._

‘Asshole,” she muttered, stretching her arms over her head.

‘Swear,” came Parker’s voice as he sat up. Rayne looked down at him, noting how tired he still looked.

‘Sorry Parker,” Rayne said with a smile, ruffling his hair. ‘Feeling better this morning?”

‘A little,” he said, though his scratchy voice said otherwise. ‘I feel cold still.”

‘We’ll get you warmed up, alright?” Rayne replied, reaching under her cot and pulling out the box to get some cough medicine. ‘Here, take some of this to help your throat.”

‘Eww.” Rayne gave a sympathetic smile.

‘I know, it’s not the best-tasting thing in the world, but it’s better than having a sore throat, right?” Parker gave her a hard look. ‘Right?”

‘I guess so,” he acquiesced as Rayne measured out the right amount of medicine in the cap and handed it to him.

‘Down the hatch then,” she answered as Parker begrudgingly accepted the medicine and drank it down, giving her the stink eye the entire time. ‘Good job!” She took the cap back and replaced it with the bottle into the box before taking out a water bottle and protein bar to put in Parker’s small pack (he still hadn’t quite figured out how to say backpack and instead called the tattered one he’d gotten from his “teacher” a pack-pack.). ‘Put this on. We need to get going soon.”

‘Okay Sissy,” he said, standing up when Rayne did and put on his jacket when she handed it to him before putting on her own.

‘Let’s go, Parker.” She said, holding out her hand for him to take as she led him towards the communal bathrooms.

* * *

Sammy watched from his perch on one of the nearby catwalks as Rayne led Parker away, keeping a close eye on the two of them until they disappeared into the crowd. Normally he would linger around from a distance when he wasn’t waking everyone up with Nolan and Terrance, but today he was going to be supervising the South gardens to watch over some transfers that were being tested outside. Sammy didn’t mind; it let him be close to Rayne even though she had been avoiding him since they got here.

He often thought back to that fateful day, remembering what had transpired with Negan and Corvus. He ground his teeth at the thought of those two. It was hard to say who he blamed most for the deaths of those who he’d called friends; Negan for being his usual self or Corvus for being more concerned about preserving his carefully constructed image of a non-English speaker than to save his own people. He’d tried to talk Simon into talking Negan out of it, trying to come up with whatever excuse he had but had failed. And now Rayne and Parker were here.

‘Well this is new,” a voice came from his left. Sammy turned his head in its direction, noticing that Simon had joined him in looking out at the sea of faces. ‘Never thought I’d see you hanging back so far away from that new girl you’ve had your eyes on.” Sammy laughed quietly, looking back out to see Rayne and Parker had re-emerged once more, making their way towards the Northside of the Sanctuary.

‘Just thought I’d keep a look out for her,” Sammy explained. ‘She’s on her own up here with her brother. She needs someone to look out for her now and then.” Simon hummed at this, his eyes locking on Rayne as well as she picked her way through the crowd with Parker in tow.

‘She’s definitely a looker,” he added. ‘Wouldn’t be surprised if the man himself decided to come calling on her.” Sammy’s smile faded slightly at this. ‘Yes sir, it’s just a matter of time before he swoops in and claims her as his wife.”

‘Negan’s going to need more than just charm to convince her to marry him,” Sammy noted, not meaning to say that out loud. Simon glanced back at him.

‘What makes you say that?”

‘Let’s just say she and I go pretty far back before all this. We lived next door to each other and went to the same college after high school. After her mom died she was all about taking care of Parker. Still is, seeing as how sick he can get sometimes. She’s not easy to win over, especially if that particular person took something from her.” Simon nodded in understanding.

‘I get that. It’s not easy looking after a kid with the world like it is. I’ll give her props; she works hard, doesn’t give anyone trouble, hell even goes above and beyond to get enough points for the kid. She doesn’t seem to care about herself, only him.” Sammy returned his nod.

‘Exactly.” He straightened up as Rayne disappeared. ‘That’s why I say she’s not going to be easy to win over.” Simon cast him a look.

‘You’re talking like you have more than just prior history with her,” the older man noted, turning to lean his side against the railing. ‘Be honest with me, Sam; were you two a thing or something?”

‘No sir,” Sammy answered honestly. ‘She wasn’t interested in me the way I was in her. We were just good friends, nothing more nothing less.”

‘Ok, I get she’s a she, but can we just get over that and start calling her by her name? Don’t think I caught it on the first day.” Simon interjected, shoving his hands in his pocket. Sammy hesitated for a moment, something that didn’t go unnoticed by Simon. ‘Hey, I get it. You got strong feelings for the girl. But don’t forget who we work for… who _we_ are. We all belong to Negan, even her. And we can’t keep running this place like a well-oiled machine without keeping track of everyone, and we can’t do _that_ without knowing everyone’s names. Now I prefer you to tell me yourself, so I don’t go scaring her any more than she probably is considering she’s in a place all on her own. But if you don’t tell me, then I’m just going to go ask her myself.” _You just want to know who she is, so you can tell Negan about her_ , Sammy thought before he sighed heavily.

‘Rayne,” he said. ‘Her name is Rayne Verloren. And her brother’s name is Parker.” Simon whistled.

‘Rayne Verloren,” he repeated, looking out at the main floor to find Rayne once again, this time alone and heading for the gardens at long last. ‘That’s an exotic name. She from Germany like her dad?”

‘No,” Sammy answered. ‘She was born here. It’s just her dad that’s German, and her mom was from Japan I think. I never really asked, just knew she was Asian.”

‘Japanese and German. That’s a hell of an interesting combination,” Simon replied. Both men watched her disappear once more. ‘Hell, it just makes her that much more interesting to look at!” Simon laughed at this, elbowing Sammy who just laughed it off, cringing inwardly. ‘Ok then. As you were, Sam.” Sammy nodded once and started to head off to his post. ‘And Sam?” He turned back to Simon. The older man looked him in the eyes for a long time. ‘If it’s any consolation- you know, if and when Negan marries her _and_ provided you get on Dwight’s level with him- you might have a chance with her if you do something pretty impressive.” Simon winked and turned heel to head off to wherever he was going before, his words haunting Sammy. The younger man just turned away, a pit forming in his stomach.

‘Not if I get to her first,” he thought out loud. He paused at this, knowing that there was little chance he had against a persistent Negan. Not only that, but he knew there was no way he could win back Rayne’s trust overnight, even if he somehow managed to convince her that he was the only person she could trust here.

Resolving to try nonetheless, Sammy set off towards the gardens, hoping that the fresh air would help to clear his mind.

* * *

Rayne was in Hell.

Dirt filled, humid and hot as blue blazes Hell.

She didn’t know how and quite frankly didn’t want to know, but overnight it seemed, all of yesterday’s hard work in organizing all of the garden tools and bags of soil was ruined thanks to a heavy rainstorm. At least, that’s what she heard. Judging by how everything was strewn about, she could understand that.

But what kind of wind tears open bags of soil and throws it everywhere?

Whatever it was, she and two others were thrown brooms and told to clean it up off the greenhouse’s concrete floor and put it into wheelbarrows to take out to the fields. She was already in a bad mood considering her rude awakening, but this was just the icing on the proverbial cupcake that was her shit day. But Rayne had said nothing, only grit her teeth and got to work sweeping, keeping her distance from the other two people that were inside with her. The heat was damn near unbearable in the greenhouse, sweat already beading up on her forehead and making Rayne ditch her red jacket in favor of wrapping it around her waist.

‘Definitely going to need a shower after this,” Rayne thought aloud quietly, ignoring the looks from the two men behind her when she stopped what she was doing to tie up her long hair. Her silver eyes looked back at them for but a second, making them look away quickly, but as soon as Rayne went back to sweeping, she became aware of their eyes on her again. She rolled her eyes, ignoring the stares. At this point in time, she was used to the stares she got. Most of them were directed at her eyes, something Rayne was definitely not a stranger to since it was the most striking thing about her, but she knew that often the attention would drop to her body.

Rayne was never happy with how she looked, even if she used to play it off like she was. Though she heard otherwise, Rayne hated having silver eyes and being constantly asked if she wore contacts or had surgery to make them that way (though those questions had stopped after the world ended). Her hair was almost always accused of being fake, making her almost wish that she had dyed it black or something. And if it wasn’t her hair or eyes, then it was her body that she directed her dislike towards. Years of being into parkour as well as going on night runs had built her to be toned, but still curvy in some places. She didn’t like it, and especially when it was hot, she felt anything but attractive.

Rayne snapped out of her thoughts when she heard the whispering behind her.

‘Damn, look at that!” one of the men said. ‘Look at that rack she has!”

‘Fucking hell, I love it working in the greenhouse!” the other whispered back. ‘That shirt of hers hugs her in just the right places.” Rayne rolled her eyes. As if they could actually see how her tank top fit on her with her back turned.

‘Can’t help but wish she was wearing shorts. Would love to see that fine ass of hers!”

‘Won’t be long, you know. Won’t be long till Negan sweeps her off her feet like all the others.” Rayne froze at this. ‘He always gets the pretty ones and leaves us stuck with the second best ones.” She bit her lip nervously, sweeping a little faster to keep them from catching on that she was listening.

‘A shame cause she’s so damn hot! I’d give anything to spend the night with her.” Rayne moved a little further away to get one of the far corners, pushing the men out of her mind. _Let them keep being creeps,_ she thought. _Long as they stay away from me, I’m fine._ Rayne was just turning the corner when she stopped in her tracks and quickly moved back around the corner. Her heart was beating a thousand miles a minute it seemed as she pressed herself against the wall.

‘Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Rayne whispered, trying to still her shaking as she peeked back around the corner. ‘What the hell is he doing out here?”

There, standing not far away talking to one of the supervisors in the gardens, was the man himself- Negan. Her silver eyes stared out at him, hoping that the plants inside the greenhouse were high enough to keep her from being seen. He didn’t look like he’d noticed she was there. Given the way they were talking to each other, he didn’t even seem to notice anyone was even in the greenhouse. Rayne had considered herself lucky that she hadn’t seen him up close since she came to the Sanctuary, although she definitely had heard his booming voice whenever he did his usual weekly speeches atop the catwalks on the main floor. Rayne tried to always be in the bathroom when he was out, tried to be elsewhere when he came around in an attempt to avoid him, but even she knew with all that that her luck would run out sooner or later.

Today appeared to be the day.

Rayne edged herself away from the corner, willing to put up with the lecherous stares of the two men working inside with her than to be near Negan when she overheard a bit of the conversation they were having.

‘-new transfers aren’t too much trouble. I got three of them over towards the end of the field and another one in the greenhouse with Morris.” She peeked her head back around slightly.

‘Hmm,” Negan said, clearly not interested as he looked around him, thankfully not looking behind him. ‘Whatever happened to that new girl from that outpost we took?” Her blood ran cold. ‘That day seemed awful stressful on her, especially given that Sammy put her down the way he did. She supposed to be working with you?” The blonde man beside Negan nodded.

‘Yeah, she’s out here with us. Nothing bad to say about her; she keeps her head down and gets stuff done. Her work’s good and the plants she works with seem to do good, so she’s alright in my book.”

‘I’ve been wondering where she got off to.” Negan’s rich baritone voice said. ‘Damn she was hot as hell. Hadn’t seen one like that since Amber came along.” He laughed at this, bringing Lucille down from her usual perch on his shoulder and looking around again. ‘Ah, where is she? I’d love to see her again.” _Don’t tell him!_ Rayne thought frantically. _Please don’t tell him!_

‘Somewhere in the greenhouse with the other two, I think,” the man said. ‘No idea whereabouts in there, but I know she’s lingering somewhere. Haven’t seen her since this morning.”

‘Cool,” Negan said, finally turning around just as Rayne darted back around the corner. ‘As you were.”

‘Fucking hell!” she cursed, quickly moving back towards some herbs along the wall she was previously at. Rayne knew those at least were tall enough to hide her from view, though she didn’t doubt that he’d be able to find her no matter where she went. Her heart continued to pound in her chest, hearing him whistling not far behind her. Rayne stopped at the end of the row, wedging herself between some tall stalks of lavender and the far wall, hoping to God he couldn’t see her.

Silver eyes peered through the plants, seeing Negan come around the corner, still looking around. The other men that had been in the greenhouse immediately hit their knees seeing Negan who just ignored them.

‘As you were,” he said. Negan stopped midstep and turned to one of them. ‘Where’s that girl you’re working with?” Rayne froze.

‘Over by the lavender,” the older of the kneeling men said. Rayne closed her eyes, cursing that man silently as she squeezed out from her hiding spot and over to the other side, hoping she could get lucky enough to avoid him. Right as she bowed her head, pretending to work, her eyes locked with the deep hazels of Negan’s. Time seemingly stood still as they stared at one another, Rayne not even realizing that he was walking towards her, taking his time and keeping his eyes on hers the entire time.

_Dammit… why? Why did I have to be in here? Why couldn’t I have gone somewhere else? Why couldn’t-_

‘Well hello there, darling,” he said, stopping right in front of her as Rayne’s head looked up at him, her hands frozen where they were on the pot of lavender. ‘Was wondering if I was ever gonna see you again,” Negan smiled at this, never once looking away from her.

‘Hi,” she answered quietly, not sure what else to say as she released a breath she didn’t realize she was holding.

‘You’re Corvus’s little girl, right?” Negan asked casually. ‘I’m Negan. You probably already knew that by now, right?” he chuckled quietly at this. Rayne nodded silently, trying not to appear nervous. All at once, his face lit up, almost like he remembered something important.

‘Excuse the goddamn shit out of me sweetheart but I don’t think I ever got your name.” Rayne was slightly taken aback by this as he leaned forward slightly. ‘What’s your name, darling? Unless you want me to keep calling you darling.” She hesitated for a moment. _It’s just your name, not like you’re selling your soul._

‘Rayne,” she finally said. ‘My name is Rayne.”

‘Rayne,” he sighed, letting her name roll off his tongue as he smiled again. ‘That is an absolutely fucking _gorgeous_ name, Rayne.” She smiled slightly despite herself.

‘Thanks.”

‘You are most welcome, Rayne.” Rayne didn’t want to admit it, but she liked the way he said her name. Normally she didn’t care, but… _Stop that,_ her mind ordered. _Don’t even go there._

‘So, how are you settling in?” he continued, leaning against the sturdy wooden shelves along with Lucille, putting both hands in his pockets. ‘You and that kid of yours doing alright?”

‘Yeah, we’re alright,” Rayne replied, looking away to start breaking off dead stalks of lavender. ‘He’s not my kid though; he’s my brother.” Negan shrugged.

‘Kid’s a kid, darling,” he replied. ‘Looks just like you. Figured he might be yours.” He laughed again. When Rayne didn’t look up at him, he sidled a little closer. ‘I’m not scaring you, am I?” Rayne shook her head. ‘Then look up at me, sugar. Let me see them beautiful eyes of yours again.” She blinked a couple of times, then obeyed him, locking her gaze with his. She took in the laugh lines around his eyes, the silver hairs that speckled his beard and his black hair that was slicked back away from his face. He was handsome, everyone would be blind not to see that.

He was also the man that killed her friends and damn near killed her father.

‘No,” she said, even though everything in her was telling her to run and get away from him. His smile grew impossibly wider.

‘Good,” he said. ‘I like that about you. You threw yourself right in front of Lucille all for your asshole of a dad. In fact, I think that makes you a badass.” Negan looked her up and down. ‘And you _definitely_ look like a badass.” Rayne didn’t return his smile, nervously glancing to the two men in the greenhouse who were staring at her again before looking back at Negan. He didn’t miss that look as his smile faded slightly.

‘Those assholes haven’t been giving you any trouble, have they?” He said with a tilt of his head, indicating them. Rayne didn’t say anything. ‘I’ll take that as a yes.” Negan reached out his gloved hand, carefully cupping her chin. ‘Anyone gives you any shit, you tell me and I’ll shut that shit down. Rape and shit don’t fucking fly here and they sure as shit know it. You say no and they don’t back off, I’ll take care of it.” Rayne looked back at him, not realizing her stare had fallen away from him. No, she was too engrossed in the fact that he was being so… gentle, almost like she was a porcelain doll that would crack at the slightest touch. It was a sharp counterpoint to his brashness, his exuberant amount of confidence.

‘Thanks,” she said, not knowing anything better to say. He kept staring at her, finally dropping his hand. ‘Why… are you looking at me like that?”

‘Cause you’re hot as fuck,” Negan said simply. Rayne blushed and looked down at her hands. ‘Something wrong with that?”

‘Well… no,” she started, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. ‘It’s just…”

‘What? Not used to someone calling you beautiful?”

‘Well, that and the fact that you don’t know me very well. And I don’t think I look the best in the world anyway.” Rayne stopped herself from rambling, not realizing that her heart had started racing in nervousness again. Negan just chuckled darkly at that.

‘I just like to call it how I fucking see it, dollface,” he grinned, dropping his hand from her chin. Rayne looked at him for a moment, not realizing that she was chewing on her lower lip. A glint came to Negan’s eyes at the sight of this, one that sent a chill down her spine.

It sent a chill of a different sort through her too.

‘Well, I got shit to handle,” Negan said, pushing off of the shelves and grabbing Lucille to bring her up onto his shoulder. ‘You have any trouble with anyone, you come find me and I’ll take care of it for you. I care about my people, unlike your douchebag of an old man.” He laughed at this, Rayne biting her tongue to keep from saying anything. Negan got a little closer to her, meeting her gaze once more.

‘I’ll see you around, Rayne-y girl,” he muttered, teasing a strand of her hair in his hand before turning around and walking away, whistling cheerfully as he cast her one last look just as he turned the corner. Rayne was frozen in place, unsure what just happened. She swallowed hard, turning back to the plants before her as she took a few deep breaths.

‘Holy shit,” she whispered, running a hand through her ponytail. That was most _definitely_ unexpected. Rayne dropped her hand, realizing that it was trembling slightly. ‘Jesus Christ,” she added, sighing heavily and looking for the broom she’d abandoned. Just as she located it and was heading towards it, she was interrupted by Sammy who’d come running in.

‘Rayne, there you are,” he said breathlessly. ‘I’ve been looking all over for you.” Rayne cast him an annoyed stare.

‘What do you want now, Sammy?” she asked. ‘I don’t know if you can tell, but I’m in the middle of-”

‘That’s not your biggest problem right now,” he said. ‘You need to come with me, right now.”

‘Why should I go anywhere with you?” Rayne shot back. She was slightly taken aback, however, when she noticed that Sammy had a panicked expression on his face. ‘Sammy, what’s going on?”

‘It’s Parker, Rayne. He collapsed just a few minutes ago. Carson’s taking care of him in the clinic, but you need to come with me, _now._ ” Rayne’s face fell at these words.

‘Oh god no,” she said, breaking out into a run with Sammy right on her heels.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because every chapter needs a suspenseful ending to keep you guys waiting on the edge of your seats. ;) 
> 
> I didn't want the first actual conversation Negan and Rayne had to be like this, but I think we all know that characters can have a mind of their own and start to wander off the carefully planned path you have for them. So that's what she did. 
> 
> I'll do my best to have the next chapter out as soon as possible, but I do have a big project due for my art major as well as going on a much needed vacation with my husband, so I can't make any promises on when it will be out. But please keep sending the kind words and kudos. They are an awesome motivator! =D


	3. Fever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sammy offers a solution to help Parker, but they and Rayne run into bigger problems.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: There is an attempted rape scene in this chapter and mentions of past sexual abuse. If you are sensitive to this kind of thing or triggered by mentions of rape or abuse, please leave this page now. It may be somewhat mild, but please consider yourself before proceeding.
> 
> You have been warned.

In record time it seemed, Rayne and Sammy eventually made it to the doctor’s office, Sammy leading the way until he skidded to a stop right outside the door, stopping Rayne before she could collide into him.

‘Here,” he said, both of them taking a moment to catch their breath. ‘He’s in here.” Rayne pushed past him, walking in and looking around for Parker. The entire room she entered smelled of antiseptics, and for a brief moment, she was taken back to her mother’s last days in the hospital, just before-

Rayne ignored that and instead looked at the exam table that was currently laid back, a man and woman leaning over a small form laying atop it.

‘Parker,” she breathed, walking briskly towards them. Hearing her approach, the woman- Mauve, was it?- came around to her, taking one of Rayne’s hands.

‘Rayne, there you are,” she began. ‘It’s little Parker! He was complaining of a sore throat and how hot he was before he fell and started having a seizure! We’ve been trying to get him to wake up but he’s burning up so badly.”

‘I want to see him,” Rayne replied. Mauve nodded and led her to where the man in the white jacket was, his form still leaning over and pressing a stethoscope to Parker’s chest.

‘Dr. Carson,” Mauve began. ‘Rayne is here.” The doctor looked up at his name, then to her, straightening up. He smiled softly, extending a hand for Rayne to shake. She did so hesitantly, trying to peek around him to see Parker.

‘It’s nice to meet you, Rayne,” Carson began, his eyes full of sympathy. ‘I’m terribly sorry for the circumstances though. How are you today?”

‘As good as I can be,” she answered, still trying to look at her brother. Seeing her attention on the little boy, Carson carefully cleared his throat.

‘I’m doing all I can for him,” he assured her. ‘But his fever is high at the moment, critically high. We’re working on getting him cooled off-”

‘I want to see my brother,” Rayne interrupted. ‘Let me see him.” Carson’s mouth remained open for a moment before nodding and moving to the side, allowing Rayne to approach the bed. Her silver eyes locked on the frail child before her, tears forming in her eyes at the sight of him.

Parker was pale, incredibly pale, though thankfully not the same pallor she’d seen on others before they… she pushed that out of her mind. His hair was hanging in his sweaty face before she carefully brushed it back, noticing how he didn’t even move at her touch. What scared her most, however, was how his little chest rose and fell irregularly, almost like he was having trouble breathing. _Parker…_

‘What’s wrong with him?” she asked, holding one of Parker’s little hands in her own, gently rearranging the cold cloths on his neck and chest, Parker merely whimpering weakly. ‘He was fine this morning except for a sore throat.”

‘I’m not sure,” Carson answered. ‘A sore throat and fever normally point to a cold, but my main concern at the moment is finding out why he’s seizing. It’s rare for fevers to cause seizures, which makes me wonder if there’s an underlying issue.”

‘Then if it’s not a fever, what is it?” Rayne asked, turning back to him. ‘He’s never had a seizure before, not even when he was being treated for his disorder.” Carson gave her a strange look.

‘What kind of disorder does he have?”

‘It’s… just an autoimmune disorder. They called it something else but in layman’s terms he just gets sicker than others easily.” Rayne explained. ‘I don’t remember what it’s called. It was so long ago and he never had any more trouble with it that we didn’t think anything of it.”

‘Children don’t grow out of autoimmune disorders,” Carson pointed out, crossing his arms and resting a hand under his chin. ‘What were his symptoms? What kinds of medications was he given?” Rayne looked down, chewing on her lip.

‘He’s been on so many it’s hard to remember,” Rayne began. ‘I just remember him being given one through an IV when he was younger, maybe when he was a year old I think. It seemed like he always had the flu just before he started collapsing like this… but he’s never had a seizure. I’d remember if he did.”

‘And it’s always started with flu-like symptoms?” Rayne nodded. Carson paused, deep in thought apparently. Sammy, who’d been listening, slowly came in the room, concern written all over his face.

‘Didn’t you say that your mom had it too?” Sammy asked, coming beside Rayne. Carson looked over at him questioningly. ‘I remember hearing from you and her before.”

‘She did but… I don’t know how it has anything to do with Parker. She started having issues when she was pregnant with anxiety and random weakness but we just thought it was because she was pregnant with Parker.”

‘And after she had him, she got sick again two years later with leukemia.” Sammy added.

‘Your mother had leukemia?” Carson asked, realization coming to his face. Rayne nodded. ‘And she had similar symptoms before?”

‘Yeah, it wasn’t long after she came back home from a trip to Japan. She started complaining of feeling sick all the time, not having an appetite or anything, and the next thing we knew they said she had an immune disorder.” Rayne explained.

‘Encephalitis,” Carson muttered, more to himself than to anyone. When Rayne, Mauve, and Sammy gave him a weird look, he continued, ‘It’s the only immune disorder that comes to mind. It’s rare, but it does show up from time to time after someone becomes sick with a viral or bacterial infection. It’s the only one I can think of that would explain the seizures.”

‘Then we need to do something,” Rayne added. ‘If you know what it is then you can treat him, right?” Carson’s face fell at these words, his eyes glancing to Sammy. ‘Right?”

‘I’m afraid that’s the problem, Rayne,” he began. ‘If your brother does have encephalitis and I truly believe it’s a high possibility if your mother had it as well, then the obvious choice would be to start treatment immediately, but… seeing how everything has gone to Hell and back, I don’t have the necessary medication much less any equipment to properly diagnose him. There isn’t a means of making an official diagnosis unless you know for sure—”

‘I don’t,” Rayne argued, fighting her tears. ‘How many times do I need to say that I don’t know? He’s never had issues like this before! He’s never had seizures, he’s only had moments of not knowing where he was or being weak! How am I to know what he’s had or not?”

‘And that’s even more of a reason to hold off on treatment until I know for sure what he has,” Carson added. ‘I’m not trying to say that I’m not going to help your brother, but I’m not going to go against my beliefs and treat him for something I’m not one hundred percent sure he has.”

‘Really? Cause it sounded like a few minutes ago that you were sure.” Rayne shot back, standing up and getting closer to the doctor. ‘So are you or aren’t you sure?”

‘I-”

‘Answer me!” Rayne yelled, tears falling down her cheeks. ‘What’s wrong with my brother? Tell me!”

‘I don’t know!” Carson shouted. ‘I’m a doctor, not a miracle worker; I can’t look at someone and immediately know what’s wrong and I’m not going to treat something that I don’t know for sure is even the right diagnosis.” Rayne stood her ground, refusing to look away from him. Seeing the look in her eyes, he sighed and ran his hand through the short hair on his head. ‘I’m sorry, Rayne, I truly am. But there isn’t anything that I can do except break his fever and make him comfortable.” Her silver eyes bore into him, tears still streaming down her face before she finally closed them and looked away.

A long moment of silence passed.

‘What do you need?” she asked, taking him by surprise.

‘I’m sorry?”

‘What do you need in order to make a diagnosis?” she asked, looking back at him finally.

‘In the past, we would have done a spinal tap, blood work, or even an EEG, but none of that equipment is here. I don’t know where it can even be found anymore or even if it would work properly even if we did find it.” Rayne’s heart sunk.

‘Doctor, doesn’t Hilltop have a clinic there?’ Sammy piped up, leaning forward from where he was sitting. ‘Don’t they have special medical gear like an ultrasound machine and stuff?” Carson looked solemn for a moment.

‘I believe so, but I’m not sure if they have what we need or would even be able to do blood work. An EEG would be the most surefire way of getting a solid diagnosis but it’s a stretch to assume they’d have one.”

‘But they at least have a little more than we have at the Sanctuary, right?”

‘I think so, yes.” Sammy looked from him to Rayne.

‘Then why don’t we send Parker to Hilltop? If they have more in terms of medical stuff, then they can help him more than we can at the moment. It’s worth a try, right?”

‘What?” Rayne said, looking at him in shock. Carson’s face lit up slightly.

‘It’s true. They do have a building specifically for sick patients, and they have an equally good doctor as well.”

‘Hold on already,” the silver eyed girl snapped. ‘You’re talking like this is a done deal! Parker isn’t going anywhere without-”

‘Would you rather him stay here and get sicker?” Sammy argued. ‘The way I see it, if he stays here, then there’s a possibility that he gets sicker or worse. At least we know at Hilltop he’d have more of a chance to get the help and the medication he needs without putting you in a hole with points. Medicine like that isn’t cheap, Rayne.”

‘You’re talking like he’s a burden to me, which he isn’t.”

‘Never said he was, Rayne. I’m just saying that as his sister you need to consider what’s best for him. His best chance of getting better is if he goes somewhere that’s actually better equipped to help him more than we can, and honestly, I wouldn’t want him to go anywhere else other than Hilltop.”

‘He’s right, Rayne,” Carson added. ‘They’re good people led by a good man. If I thought I could help him here, I’d do it. But I can’t do much here for him, much less have a room where we can let him rest.” Rayne sighed angrily, walking back to her brother with her hands on her hips. She didn’t like this. She didn’t like this at all!

‘So you’re asking me to trust you about complete strangers,” she began in a low voice. ‘You’re asking me to send my brother- my _only_ brother- to people he doesn’t know and hope that they can help him while I stay here and not be there with him?”

‘Yes, we are!” Sammy argued, standing up from his seat to approach her. ‘I get that he’s your brother. I get that you don’t have anyone else around, ok? But you’ve said it yourself; you’re all Parker has. You can’t afford to think of anyone else but him. This is something that can save his life. It may mean that you won’t see him again for a while, but isn’t that a small price to pay compared to seeing him get better and live as normal a life as we can manage nowadays? Think about what you’d want someone to do if it was you… think about what your mom would want you to do.” Rayne fell silent at this, her head looking heavenward as she closed her eyes. Everything in her wanted to punch Sammy for bringing her mom into this, wanted to punch the doctor too just because he reminded her of her mother’s old physician. But as strong as the urge was, she didn’t.

Because he was right.

Dammit to Hell, Sammy was right.

_I’m being selfish,_ Rayne thought with shame. _Mom would tell me I’m being selfish…_

‘They’re good people?” she finally asked, looking over her shoulder. Sammy nodded.

‘Yes,” he replied. ‘All of them. Sure they aren’t the biggest fans of us, but they’re good people. The last few good people probably left on this Earth.” Rayne considered this carefully.

‘And they’ll take good care of him? They won’t… they won’t kick him out just because he’s sick?”

‘Rayne, you have my word; they’ll take care of him. I swear it,” Carson added. ‘I’m sure we can work out some kind of arrangement to where they’ll send updates to you, possibly even let you come see him.” Rayne mulled everything over in her mind. This was a gamble, she knew. But it was even more of a gamble to sit and do nothing.

_Everything for Parker_ , she reminded herself.

‘How soon can we get him there?” she asked, turning around. Sammy put a hand behind his head.

‘That’s going to be the tricky part,” he admitted. He stopped to look at Mauve. ‘Go make sure the door is locked. I don’t want anyone walking in on this.” Mauve nodded and practically ran to the door. When she was sure it was locked, she rejoined them. ‘The tricky part about this is that Negan is a stickler for who leaves the Sanctuary. The only people who leave are the Saviors, scavengers, and Negan himself. Anyone that’s caught trying to run away is shot down. I’m not going to sugar coat what we’d be getting ourselves into.” Sammy looked at the doctor. ‘Do you think there’s anything you can say to get Parker to Hilltop?” Carson gave him a distressed look.

‘Sam, we’re already playing with fire here,” he warned. ‘Negan can kill all four of us for even talking the way we are.”

‘Which is why nothing we say in here leaves this room. Patient-doctor confidentiality right?”

‘Sam-”

‘I know it’s a risk, but it’s one we have to take.”

‘Sam, I don’t think you understand. Even if I manage to convince Negan, there’s no chance he’ll even say yes. It’ll take one word getting back to him and we’re all done for. Nothing happens here that he doesn’t know about.” Rayne listened to this back and forth, listening carefully. She knew well that they were playing a dangerous game, especially having seen what happened to her friends.

_If it means Parker will live… then it doesn’t matter how high the cost is._

‘What if… Negan was distracted?” She said quietly. All three people looked at her. ‘Like… what if someone kept him busy, kept his attention off what was really going on to buy enough time for Parker to be taken out of here?”

‘The only distraction I know of is tempting him with a new wife,” Mauve said. ‘We all know he’s a sucker for a pretty face, but it’ll take more than just the promises of a new wife to keep him occupied. He’s everywhere here.”

‘So we cause another diversion elsewhere when everyone will be busy and move out,” Rayne admitted. ‘There has to be something. The more time we sit here debating, the less time-”

The sounds of Parker seizing behind her caused her to stop, Rayne rushing to his side with Carson right on her heels.

‘Parker!” she cried, holding his left side. ‘Parker, it’s alright! It’s alright! Sissy’s here!” Carson pulled her back. ‘What are you doing?”

‘Don’t try to hold him down!” he ordered. ‘Let it pass!”

‘But what if he falls? What if he hurts himself?” Rayne protested, squirming away from him. As quickly as it came, the seizure stopped, Parker going limp once again as Carson hurried back to him, putting a stethoscope to the boy’s chest.

‘His heart rate is fast but it’s slowing down,” he said, pressing the stethoscope to one of Parker’s wrists and looking at his watch. A moment passed before he replaced the stethoscope around his neck. ‘His pulse is slightly elevated, but it’s likely a response to the seizure.” His face became serious. ‘I don’t like what you’re plotting, Sammy, but my responsibility to my patients is my priority. If you think you can come up with a way to get this boy to Hilltop, then do it. I never heard anything.”

‘Neither did I,” Mauve admitted. ‘I’ve come to love this little boy in the time he spends with me during the day. I’d see him continue to be here and grow to be a fine young man.”

‘What about you, Rayne?” Sammy asked, looking back to where she was. When he saw Rayne was gone, he almost panicked, more so when he heard the sounds of someone running. ‘Rayne? Rayne!” Sammy ran to the door. ‘Fuck. Take care of Parker. I’ll go get Rayne and get things figured out. Anything changes, you call for me.”

‘Will do!” Carson called. Sammy nodded and took off down the hall again, hellbent on finding Rayne.

* * *

Her heart was pounding in her head, breath tearing out of her as Rayne headed down the hall, quickly getting away from that room. Images of Parker seizing, his little body convulsing uncontrollably… it was too much. She couldn’t watch that, not when she saw it happen so many times before with her mother.

She didn’t know where she was going, didn’t care quite frankly at this point as she cut a corner, pressing herself hard against the wall in a darkened hallway as she breathed heavily, hearing someone running after her and continuing past where she was.

‘Rayne, come back!” she heard Sammy call, his voice echoing further away. Rayne ignored him, her hands pressed against her mouth and nose as she tried to calm down, her breathing tearing in and out of her lungs.

‘Parker,” she whispered, sinking down until her butt hit the hard ground, her knees coming up to her chest. Tears fell uncontrollably down her cheeks, her silver eyes closing as she tried desperately to banish the memories flooding her shock open mind. ‘Mom… Parker…” Rayne’s head met her knees, her arms holding them close to her. ‘Why… why is it always you… why is it always the people I love the most…”

_‘Please don’t go,” she begged, hanging onto the ailing Isabella. The heart monitor was beeping, slower and slower as her mother held her gently._

_‘My dear sweet Rayne,” Isabella managed, smiling against Rayne’s hair. ‘I’m sorry… I wish we had more time.” Rayne sobbed against her mother’s chest, clinging tighter to her. ‘I know you don’t want me to go, but I’m always with you. Just look at Parker, and you’ll find me.”_

_‘Mommy,” she whispered. ‘I need you here… I can’t lose you. I can’t leave you…”_

_‘There’s nowhere you can go that I won’t be with you, Rayne. Parker needs you to be his mother now. Take care of him, no matter what, and keep making me proud my sweet girl,” Isabella smiled weakly, tears falling from the older Verloren’s eyes as she touched her daughter’s face. ‘Nankurunaisa, Rayne. Watashi wa anata o totemo aishiteimasu, watashi no amai ko. Mata au made.” With those words, Isabella sighed and closed her eyes._

_She never woke up._

‘Mom… Okaa-san… I need you so much,” Rayne whispered as she cried, the last memory of her mother fading away from her mind. ‘How is everything going to be alright when you’re gone and Parker is…” Sensing she wasn’t alone, Rayne paused, slowly raising her head up and gasping in surprise.

‘Well look at what we have here!” Morris- the man she’d been working with earlier- said, leering down at her. ‘I was wondering what happened to you when you never came back to work.” Rayne just stared blankly at him as he laughed to himself, kneeling down before her. Rayne immediately stood up, backing away from him. ‘You know, you don’t have to run off; you can stay awhile. I’m sure I can help ya feel better.” He said suggestively, standing up and following her. Rayne scrubbed at her eyes, wiping away her tears fiercely.

‘No thanks, I can take care of myself.” Rayne said, turning around and walking down the hallway only to collide with another man who emerged from the shadows. Her eyes widened when she recognized him as the same man who woke her up this morning.

‘Shit Morris, you weren’t kidding,” he said, rubbing his hands together. ‘She is a hot one.”

‘That’s why I said we better get her before Negan does. He always gets the pretty ones. He was already eyeing her up this morning, so we’re gonna have to make this quick.” Morris agreed, blocking Rayne off. She looked from him to the other man, realizing what was happening.

‘Leave me alone,” she growled, trying to hide the growing fear in her voice. ‘What didn’t you understand when I said I can take care of myself?” Both men just laughed at this, Rayne trying to look for an opening to get away.

‘We can help you take care of yourself,” Morris said, licking his lips. ‘You got a little boy right? Don’t you think he needs a daddy to help ya take care of him?”

‘You look like the kind of girl that has daddy issues,” the other man said, cutting her off when she tried to dart around him. ‘Young and sweet.”

‘We like them young,” Morris added, taking advantage of Rayne’s back being turned to grab her. She shrieked in surprise, squirming desperately. ‘The young ones are always the most fun!”

‘Let go!” She cried. ‘Let me go!”

‘Trust me, you won’t be wanting us to let you go when we’re done,” the older man said, grabbing Rayne’s shirt and tearing it off her much to her chagrin. ‘We’re gonna have lots of fun with you. Better to get everything in now before Negan takes you.”

‘Stop it!” She hissed, fighting harder against Morris, who grabbed her breasts and squeezed them hard, drawing a cry from her. ‘Stop! Get away from me!” Both men just laughed at her. ‘STOP!”

‘The more you fight, the better it is,” Morris whispered, biting her neck and making her scream just as the other man started unbuttoning her pants. ‘Shut her up, Terrance. We don’t need any-”

‘What the fucking fuck is going on back here?” came the booming voice of Negan. Both Terrance and Morris stopped immediately, letting Rayne go and dropping to their knees. She took that as an opportunity to slip away, backing up as far as she could from the two of them.

‘Negan, sir!” Terrance said. ‘We were just-”

‘You don’t need to answer me,” Negan cut him off, walking closer to the two of them. ‘I can see for my fucking self what you were doing. I heard every goddamn word, every fucking scream coming from that girl; you were trying to rape her.”

‘No!” Morris argued. ‘She wanted it! She begged for it!” Negan’s eyes looked up at her, finding her cowering in the shadows trying desperately to cover her chest with what remained of her tank as she shook pugnaciously. Rayne didn’t meet his stare, only kept her gaze on the ground. From the corner of her eye, however, she could see his body language go from tense to full of rage, Lucille raising up and coming down on one of the men closest to him.

‘Rape. Is. Against. The. Rules.” He said, emphasizing each word with another swing down onto whoever he was taking his anger out on. ‘You. Crossed. The. Fucking. Line.” Rayne covered her ears, trying to drown out the sounds as he went for the second assailant, bouncing back and forth between the two until there was nothing left of their heads. At least, she assumed nothing was left of them.

‘You guys, look at my dirty girl,” he said gleefully. ‘Lucille is a thirsty little vampire bat!” Rayne didn’t look at him, just stayed where she was as her hands fell back to the ground. Her brain was still trying to wrap itself around what just happened, what almost happened.

She didn’t realize that Negan had come closer to her.

‘You ok, Rayne-y girl?” he asked, crouching down with the bloody Lucille hanging between his knees. Rayne didn’t look at him, only nodded. ‘You sure?” Negan murmured, his voice surprisingly soft. Rayne looked at him from the corner of her eye, clutching the tattered remains of her shirt to her exposed chest. He whistled behind him. ‘Get Rayne a new t-shirt. Now.” Negan ordered, not leaving her side. One man rushed off to do as he asked. ‘And get that shit out of here. It’s scaring her.” The other man left to get help doing as he was asked, leaving Negan and Rayne alone. Silence fell over them as he reached out to tuck a strand of hair out of her face.

‘Rayne, look at me sugar” he asked, keeping his voice low. Rayne rose her head slowly, trembling violently as her silver eyes met his hazel gaze. She was slightly taken aback by the look of concern on his face… who would have thought he was capable of concern? ‘You don’t have to be afraid, Rayne-y girl,” Negan soothed, still playing with a strand of her hair. ‘They can’t hurt you now.” Her silver eyes glanced behind him, noticing that there were four men now taking the bodies away. Noticing where she was looking, he put himself between the dead men and her, blocking off her sight.

‘Don’t look, darling,” he ordered. ‘They crossed the line. They deserved that.” Rayne looked at his eyes for a moment before she looked away, shame on her face. ‘I told you didn’t I? Anyone tries any shit with you, I’ll shut that shit down, knock it right out the fucking park.” He laughed a little at this. ‘That was a hell of a hit, right?” Rayne just nodded, not sharing in his jolliness. Negan’s smile faded back to solemnness. ‘Listen, those fuckers? They earned their dance with Lucille. You? You’re safe now. Ain’t nobody gonna put their hands on you while I’m here.”

‘You can’t be around all the time,” Rayne muttered. ‘If they did it, then there are others that will too. Others will try it when you’re not looking…” Negan cupped her chin gently.

‘And the same thing will happen to them.” He promised, a fierce look coming to his eyes. ‘I’ll string every goddamn one of them up till the message is clear; rape does not and will never fly here. I’d hate to be somewhere where it was, where leaders let that kind of shit happen and turn a blind eye.” She glanced back at him, her eyes watery with tears. A different look came into his eyes, realizing why Rayne must have said something about others. ‘This happened to you before?”

Rayne looked away immediately, one of her hands unconsciously coming to brush against her left shoulder self consciously. Negan followed that hand with his eyes, catching a glimpse of what lay under it; a scar. A long scar, likely from a knife judging by the smooth edges.

It became very obvious as to why she was skeptical of others not trying something like this again.

‘Did your dad let that happen to you?” Negan quietly asked, hiding the rage in him to keep from scaring her even more. ‘Did that fucker let someone get away with hurting his little girl?”

‘He didn’t believe me when I told him,” she replied just as quietly. ‘He said if it did, then I’d have more than just a cut on my shoulder.” Negan growled low in his throat at this. Rayne glanced up at him at the sound, observing him with those enchanting silver eyes as he hovered near her.

‘So they raped you and he didn’t do a damn thing about it.”

‘I… I don’t know if you could call it rape,” Rayne admitted. ‘They didn’t…” her tears came back, flowing over her cheeks as she closed her eyes. ‘Please don’t make me talk about it…” The concern came back to Negan’s eyes as he came closer to her, one hand gently smoothing out her hair as she began to fall apart before him.

‘Shh,” he soothed as Rayne sobbed before him. ‘It’s ok now. You’re safe, you’re safe with me.” He stayed near her for a long while, never leaving her side. Without really realizing it, Rayne began leaning towards him, her head resting on his chest when Negan moved Lucille to the side and drew her into his embrace.

Rayne jerked slightly at the contact, her eyes opening for a moment and looking up at him before relaxing slightly. _He killed your friends_ , a voice inside her said. _He killed your friends and just killed two men, and you’re really going to let him hold you?_

_He saved me,_ she argued back. _He saved me._

A moment or two passed before Rayne’s sobs faded away to the occasional sniffle, Negan finally pulling back from Rayne slightly to look at her. She met his hazel gaze, her silvers observing him quietly. She started to say something when the Savior from before returned holding a shirt in his hand.

‘Got that shirt you asked for, sir,” he said, holding it out for Negan to take, who then handed it to Rayne.

‘Here you go, darling,” he said, handing the shirt to her. Rayne immediately put it on, letting the remains of her tank top finally fall. It wasn’t the best shirt in the world- just a simple grey shirt- but it was far more modest than the first. Once she was dressed, Negan rose to his feet, extending a hand to help her up. Rayne hesitated for a moment, then took his hand, coming up shakily.

‘You’re not hurt anywhere are you?” Negan asked, looking her up and down. Rayne shook her head.

‘No, I’m fine,” she answered. Again she hesitated. ‘Thank you.” Negan just smiled at her.

‘You’re most welcome, Rayne-y girl.” His smile grew as he put a hand on the small of her back, leading her away from the hall. ‘Now let’s get you somewhere better than a dark hall.” Rayne nodded and allowed him to guide her away, his hand never leaving her back as they both stepped over the bloodied entrance, her earlier heartbreak forgotten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to laugh a little because of what my husband and dear beta reader said when they read how Negan and Rayne interacted with each other near the end. They both said something along the lines of "Look at dat boy being all slick and trying to get that phone number." No idea why they think he's being slick here, but whatever floats their boats. (They aren't ready for what's coming later if they think this is being slick ;) )
> 
> Again, thank you all for your kind words and kudos. You all are awesome!! 
> 
> Japanese Translation: (Again, if this is wrong, I'm so sorry.)
> 
> Nunkurunaisa- Everything will be alright.  
> Watashi wa anata o totemo aishiteimasu, watashi no amai ko. Mata au made.- I love you so much, my sweet child. Until we meet again.  
> Okaa-san- Mother


	4. Breaking Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sammy searches for Rayne, who's a little preoccupied at the moment with Negan.

Sammy was panicking.

He’d practically torn the underside of the Sanctuary apart, searched high and low and hadn’t spotted Rayne at all. Sammy would like to think that Rayne wouldn’t say anything about what they were planning, but a part of him was worried; he worried that Rayne had indeed harbored a grudge and had run to tell someone, someone who would tell another someone who would relay it to Negan-

No.

No, he knew Rayne. She wouldn’t do that.

But still, he worried.

He sighed heavily, leaning against the railing of a catwalk and scanned the workers and other people milling around below, hoping he’d catch a glimpse of her. So far, all he’d managed to do was make his anxiety go through the roof. _How can someone with her color hair be so hard to find?_ He thought, gripping the bars anxiously. Brown eyes scanned the area one more time, praying that he was just looking over her. Not near the market, not in the common area… he frowned. Finding a singular person in a factory this size was nigh impossible, especially with so many places that one can be.

‘Yo, Sammy!” a familiar voice called from his side. He turned his head, recognizing the Savior that joined him up on the catwalk. ‘You alright? You look like you’re missing something.”

‘I’m good Seth,” he replied to the Korean man, looking back out at the sea of faces. ‘Just looking for someone.”

‘Ah, that new girl?” Seth replied. ‘The one you’ve been watching all stalkerish?” The black haired man nudged him and laughed, Sammy merely smiling and elbowing him back. ‘When are you finally gonna tell that girl you love her?”

‘She’s a friend, dude,” Sammy answered. ‘I don’t love her like that. And I’m _not_ stalking her.”

‘That’s not what it looks like,” Seth teased with a laugh, giving him a friendly smile and handing him a piece of gum, something Sammy accepted and popped in his mouth. ‘So, you hear the news?”

‘What news?”

‘About what went down not far from Doc’s office.” Seth explained, chewing away on his gum. Sammy looked at him questioningly.

‘What happened?” he asked, feeling his chest tighten.

‘Apparently, Morris and Terrance got caught trying to rape a girl. And it turns out that they’d been doing that to a lot of other girls here too.” Seth replied, popping his gum loudly. ‘They’re tearing up Terrance’s room right now and found a shit ton of panties and shit in there and Morris’s is no better. They’ve been doing this for close to six months now.”

‘Damn,” Sammy exclaimed, calming down slightly. ‘Always knew they were creepy, always lingering around girls.”

‘Morris was, Terrance was the last guy I’d think would do some shit like that.” Seth continued. ‘Anyways, Negan caught them right in the act just as they were about to hurt that girl they had. From what Troy and Nick said, he bashed them both pretty damn good. There’s a big chance we’re gonna hear about it the next time Negan graces us all with his speech.” Seth rolled his eyes slightly, something Sammy reciprocated as he resumed chewing on his gum.

‘Well, rape _is_ against the rules here, so they had it coming the way I see it.” Sammy added. ‘So what happened to the girl?”

‘The last I heard, Negan took her to his office or something. Probably gonna question her some more, probably gonna get a new wife knowing him. A damn shame too, she’s hot as fuck.” Seth said. ‘Simon fucking called it man, it was only a matter of time.” Sammy’s blood ran cold suddenly as he looked at him from the corner of his eye.

‘You wouldn’t have happened to get a good look at the girl would you?” he asked quietly. Sensing his unease, Seth looked up at him.

‘You probably don’t want to know man.”

‘Seth, tell me.” Seth was quiet for a moment, running his hand through his short ebony hair.

‘Trust me, Sammy. It’s better you don’t know. I don’t want you getting—”

‘Seth.” Sammy’s voice hardened.

‘Alright, alright. It was the new girl. Rayne, I think is what he called her, but it’s probably gonna be wife if he has it his way.” Sammy’s heart dropped to his stomach, all color draining from his face. ‘I tried to tell ya, man. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

‘Fucking hell,” Sammy whispered, looking away. ‘Please tell me it wasn’t her. Tell me you’re joking right now.”

‘Hard to joke about something I saw for myself, Sam. She wasn’t hurt or anything from what I saw, but she looked a little shaken up.” He patted him on the shoulder. ‘Look, if it’s any consolation, I know how you feel. I… had a thing for Tanya before he grabbed her and took her up with the rest of the hot chicks. It sucks ass man, but it’s part of this. We’re all Negan. We all work and belong to him and if he wants a girl we like for his wife, then he’s going to take her.”

‘She won’t say yes. She won’t do it,” Sammy muttered. Seth gave him a long look.

‘I said the same thing about Tanya,” he said quietly, hurt coming to his eyes. ‘Negan’s a slick guy. It’s easy to say yes when you’re down there working for points, barely surviving, let alone when you got a kid.” When Sammy said nothing, Seth patted him again before turning away, looking over his shoulder one last time. ‘If you care about her man, let her go. Don’t be like Dwight, Sam. Please.” With that he turned away, leaving Sammy alone once more.

* * *

It seemed like a good while that Rayne walked with Negan, following him up four flights of stairs. This part of the Sanctuary looked much nicer compared to the parts she was accustomed to; everything seemed brighter, more than likely from the windows that lit their way. The final flight of stairs led them to the nicest area, one that was impeccably clean and luxuriously decorated with wooden doors and rugs. Down one end of the hall, Rayne saw what looked like a parlor of sorts, a lavish one at that. She could have sworn she saw people in there- women- all of them talking to one another. But she had no opportunity to look inside as Negan led her to the other side of the hall to a set of French doors.

_I don’t like this,_ Rayne thought inside. _Something is off about this…_

Before she had a chance to protest, Negan had opened one of the doors and urged her inside, following behind her and closing the door. Rayne looked around, noticing that they were in one of the nicest bedrooms she had ever seen.

The walls were grey with lush decorations everywhere she looked. In one corner was a huge four-poster bed with dark gray blankets and comfortable pillows at the head. In the other corner was a black leather couch and two chairs situated on either side of a coffee table. To the far end was another door that she assumed led to a bathroom, large vases sitting atop decorative tables giving a fancy look to the room.

‘Take a seat, doll face,” Negan said, flicking his wrist to one of the chairs as he took off his scarf and tossed it on the bed. Rayne looked to one of the chairs and walked over to one, doing as she was bid. The chair was quite comfortable, more comfortable than the hard wooden chairs she was accustomed to in the canteen. She sank back slightly, though Rayne was careful not to become too comfortable. She didn’t think she’d be comfortable for a while considering…

‘Is this your room?” Rayne asked, looking around. Negan smiled at the look on her face as she took everything in.

‘Hell yeah,” he answered, taking a seat on the couch opposite of her. ‘Scavenged all this myself. Figured why not be comfortable _and_ a badass at the same time.” Negan laughed at this, leaning back casually. ‘Never had any of this back at your dad’s place?” Rayne looked at him and shook her head.

‘The most luxurious thing we ever had were working showers,” she admitted. ‘Dad said it used to be an old resort or something, so we had to make do with what we had.”

‘Figures,” Negan huffed. ‘He’s not just an ass to others, but he’s an even bigger asshole to his people. Must have not given two flying fucks when I bashed in those people’s—”

‘My friends,” Rayne interrupted. Negan stopped and looked at her. ‘Those people were my friends. They were good people, people that didn’t deserve to die the way they did.” She was trying to hold back the venom in her voice at this, but it came nonetheless. At the look in Negan’s eyes, she wondered if she should have said that at all.

He was deathly silent for a moment before a grin came to his face.

‘Well, look at you,” he said, leaning forward. ‘You’re just as much a badass as I thought you were, calling me out on that shit.” Negan laughed again, something that didn’t sit well with Rayne. ‘You’re right, they didn’t deserve that. They could have been living it up here with you but your douchebag dad decided to play games with me.” Rayne never looked away from him. ‘A lesson had to be learned there. I didn’t want to kill your people, but—what’s your dad’s name again?”

‘Corvus,” Rayne said.

‘What you said, crossed the line. He may have been playing that he didn’t understand what I was saying, but I saw straight through that bullshit. He had more than one opportunity to give me an answer before I bashed in their skulls, but he wanted to be a badass. So Lucille took their heads off, and I got you.” His grin grew impossibly wider, something Rayne didn’t reciprocate.

‘Is that why you brought me up here?” she asked with a sigh. ‘To remind me of what happened? I don’t need a reminder; I saw everything.”

‘Of course not, darling,” he said, that Cheshire cat-like grin never leaving his face. ‘If I wanted to remind you, I would have just bashed in the skulls of those fuckers who tried to rape you just now right in front of you and made you watch. But… I’m a stand-up guy. I made sure you didn’t have to see it after the fact.” He stood up suddenly, coming closer to her as he took a seat on the coffee table before facing her.

‘Then why?” she asked, her silver eyes staring into his hazels. His gaze softened as a hand came back to her chin, resting gently under it much like it had earlier.

‘Because I want to get to know you, Rayne-y girl,” Negan murmured, that rich Southern baritone sending chills down her spine. ‘You’ve been avoiding me all this time after I so kindly took you and your boy in. Now I want to know more about Douchebag Corvus’s little girl.” Rayne looked away from him.

‘There’s not much to know,” she admitted.

‘Bullshit,” Negan said suddenly, making her jump. ‘Bullshit,” he said in a softer tone. ‘I’ve seen you walking around, even if you think I haven’t. I’ve heard all kinds of things about you and your kid brother.” She looked back at him finally, a confused look on her face. His grin returned. ‘Yeah, I’ve heard all sorts of stuff about you, darling. How good of a worker you are, how hard you work, how much you sacrifice all for that little boy. I like that about you. Hell, it reminds me of why I took you in the first place.”

‘I’m all Parker has now,” Rayne admitted. ‘We don’t have our father anymore, so I have to raise him.”

‘What about your mom? Where’s she at?” Rayne paused, her gaze falling away again. Negan caught on right away. ‘Damn, dead huh? Walkers?”

‘No…” Rayne said. ‘She never made it that far.” Negan said nothing, just caressed her jaw gently with his thumb.

‘Did you do it?” He finally asked. Rayne didn’t say anything even as tears began to fill her eyes again. ‘Or did your dad put her down?”

‘Leukemia,” Rayne muttered quietly. ‘She died three weeks before everything went to Hell… Mom never had to see any of this…” She closed her eyes, trying not to let the memory come back like before. The very _last_ thing she wanted to do was fall apart in front of him, to give him something to laugh at like the deaths of her friends.

‘Shit, no wonder your dad’s so fucked up.” He laughed quietly. Though he laughed, Rayne could have sworn she heard something in his voice, something that could almost pass for… sadness?

A silence fell over them both.

‘So you’re all the little guy has now, huh?” Negan asked, quickly getting off the topic of her mother. Rayne nodded, her eyes fastened on the floor. ‘I heard how you take care of him. You bust your ass for that kid, hell, you go way above what you’re supposed to just to get enough points for him.” Rayne looked up at him finally. His smile was back on his face the moment her eyes connected with his. ‘Be honest with me: how come you don’t use any of them on yourself?”

‘Because he’s more important,” Rayne revealed. ‘When he has everything he needs, then I take care of myself. He needs them more than I do.”

‘You know, you don’t have to bust your ass as much as you do,” he pointed out. Rayne gave him a questioning look. Negan’s eyes took on a strange light, one that sent chills down her spine.

It sent a different kind of chill through her as well.

‘What do you mean?”

‘You’re a smart girl, Rayne,” Negan stated. ‘Why else do you think I’d be talking about how hard you work?” Before she had a chance to answer, Negan cut her off. ‘I’m gonna cut straight to the chase here, sugar. You are a very, _very_ attractive woman, and it’s hard as fuck for me to look away when I see you down below. And how can I forget how you put yourself between Lucille and your dad just to save him?” he chuckled quietly. ‘I don’t want a repeat performance of today. I don’t want anyone else coming for my Rayne-y girl, so here’s the deal: I’ll help you and your brother out. I’ll be your daddy now and take care of you, make sure you both got everything you need. That sound good to you?” It sounded amazing. It was perfect timing; Parker would be able to get to Hilltop after all! It was absolutely perfect… 

It was almost too good to be true.

‘What’s the catch?” she asked.

‘All you gotta do is marry me.” Negan said simply.

Rayne blinked.

She didn’t even breathe for a solid minute or two.

She’d misheard him. She had to have misheard him! He didn’t just… he didn’t just ask her to marry him. No one proposes to someone they barely know!

No one except for Negan apparently.

Negan, who didn’t miss her reaction, took her shock as an opportunity to edge close to her, moving so that she was practically sitting between his knees as he towered over her. Even sitting down, he pretty much dwarfed her smaller frame.

‘Why… do you want to marry me?” Rayne asked, snapping out of her shock enough to form words. Negan just cocked his head.

‘Why?” he repeated with a smile, bringing himself closer to her till their faces were just inches away from one another, resting his forehead against hers. ‘Because I want to.”

‘That doesn’t tell me why.” Rayne repeated, clearly flustered at his close proximity. ‘You barely know me…”

‘Don’t have to know you to want you, baby,” he answered, enjoying the small sound she made when his hand ghosted down to the side of her neck. Rayne swallowed hard. ‘You know what I think? I think you want me too, you’re just afraid to admit it.” Her silver eyes met his, a look of denial in them.

‘I… I don’t…”

‘You can say no, darling. No pressure at all,” Negan assured her. ‘You’ve had a rough day enough as it is. Don’t feel like you gotta answer me right away.” He turned his head, closing the distance between them. For a moment Rayne thought he was going to kiss her, her eyes sliding closed. But he didn’t, instead, he bypassed her trembling lips as though they bored him and instead moved to her ear. ‘Sleep on it awhile. Focus on the little guy. Come find me when you decide, unless you’d rather me come to you.” He chuckled in her ear, sending chills down her again as he drew back, clearly amused at the look on her face.

‘I think I know what you’re gonna say anyway.” He observed, that grin threatening to cut right across his face. ‘I just got a feeling.” With those words, he pressed a chaste kiss to her forehead, Rayne closing her eyes at the feeling.

It felt wrong. It felt wrong to let the man who had taken her childhood friends away kiss her head, to hold her face so gently.

But it felt so right to just give in…

A sharp knock at the door made Negan break away from Rayne, his head raising to the door.

‘Come in,” he called, running a hand over his beard. The door opened behind her, and Rayne turned at the sound of it to see a portly man dressed in a white shirt and blue overshirt with a simple pair of blue jeans come in. His eyes darted nervously to Rayne before looking back at Negan.

‘Sorry to interrupt sir, but… Carson wanted me to let you know that he had an important matter to speak with you about. It’s, uh, urgent.” Negan sighed in annoyance, patting Rayne’s knee gently.

‘I got to handle this,” he told her in an apologetic voice. ‘Think about what I said, ok?” Rayne nodded, standing when he did the same.

‘Fat Joseph, take Rayne here back to her little brother. Make sure no more creepos follow her around.” Negan ordered, passing her off to the guy he called Fat Joseph. _That’s rather rude,_ she thought. Joseph (she refused to call him fat) nodded quickly.

‘Yes sir,” he answered, holding the door open for Rayne as she headed towards the door before Negan caught her arm. She stopped and turned back to him, tilting her head back to look him in the eye as he leaned down to her.

‘Anyone bothers you, and I mean anyone, you come straight to me. Don’t try to be a little badass and get yourself hurt, ok?” he ordered, his gloved hand touching her face softly. Rayne leaned into it without really realizing she did before she nodded. ‘Good girl,” Negan praised, smiling and leaning down to kiss her forehead again before sending her on her way. Rayne glanced back at him one more time before heading out the door, feeling his eyes on her as she left.

As soon as she crossed the threshold and headed for the stairs, Joseph closed the door and followed after her, clearly still exhausted from the climb up.

‘Where is your little brother?” He asked conversationally. Rayne slowed her gait to keep up with him, her hand on the handrail for balance as they descended.

‘He’s in the clinic,” she admitted, pausing after she said this. ‘At least he was earlier.”

‘Oh, that was your brother?” Joseph asked, looking at her. ‘I saw a kid down there earlier, looked like he was in bad shape. I thought I overheard the doctor say something about needing specialized care or something like that. Mind if I ask what’s wrong?”

‘He… it’s complicated,” Rayne began as they took the next flight. ‘He was born with an autoimmune disorder that flares up once in a blue moon. Today is one of those instances.”

‘Oh… I’m sorry to hear that,” Joseph replied. Rayne looked over and smiled at him.

‘Thanks, I appreciate it.” She was silent before Joseph coughed slightly.

‘You know, we got lots of great stuff here to help him out; medicine and a good doctor that is. We can get him taken care of no problem.” Rayne listened to him carry on, clearly trying to be friendly to her. It was sweet to hear someone talk about helping her little brother, truly, but she kept thinking of the conversation Sammy had had with her, Mauve, and Carson earlier. 

‘What about if someone is really sick?” she asked. ‘Like, hypothetical situation, let’s say that they are sick with something rare that needs specialized care like with heart disease or something?” Joseph paused, thinking hard.

‘I guess maybe they get sent out to another community,” he replied. ‘I can’t really give an answer to that since I’m not too sure. If you want I can ask—”

‘No, that’s fine. Thank you though,” Rayne said quickly. She didn’t need someone getting suspicious anyways, though she was more than certain that it was only a matter of time before word spread in the first place about Parker being sick or even what happened with Terrance and Morris.

They were just coming down the last flight of stairs when they were greeted by Sammy, who looked like he’d been waiting for them. He was leaning against one of the walls, his head down and arms crossed over his chest, almost like he wasn’t happy.

‘Hey, Sam!” Joseph greeted, waving at the Savior. Sammy looked up and nodded in his direction, his gaze dropping to Rayne.

‘Hey Sammy,” Rayne said. Sammy only stared at her.

‘Hey,” he finally said, looking away finally. Her brow furrowed at his coldness; this wasn’t like Sammy at all. _Did something happen,_ she wondered, stopping in front of him.

‘Everything ok?” she asked. Sammy nodded, not meeting her gaze. Rayne turned to Joseph. ‘I can find my way to the clinic if you want to head out, Joseph.”

‘Are you sure? It’s really no problem. And you can call me Fat—”

‘No, I’ll call you Joseph. That’s your name, right?” she said with a smile. ‘And it’s perfectly fine. It was really nice meeting you.” Joseph’s face lit up as he nodded.

‘Absolutely,” He said. ‘Anytime you need something, just let me know. Anything at all.” He waved goodbye to her and headed off down the opposite end of the hall. Rayne watched him go before looking back at Sammy, noticing how he still wasn’t looking at her.

‘You want to tell me what’s going on now?” Rayne asked, crossing her arms.

‘I could ask you the same thing,” he retorted. ‘I heard Negan took you upstairs for a chat.” Oh, so that was what this was over. ‘And I heard about what happened with Morris and Terrance.” Rayne looked down at this, shame coming back to her face.

‘I’d… really rather not talk about that,” she said.

‘But you’d talk to Negan about it,” he hissed. Rayne shot him a look at this. ‘So, did you say yes?”

‘What are you talking about?”

‘Did you say you’d marry him? Word around here is that you’re gonna be his next one.” Rayne rolled her eyes.

‘Are you serious right now?” she began. ‘You’re not looking at me because you think I’m going to marry him?” Sammy shrugged. ‘Seriously, you’re acting like we’re back in high school.”

‘Maybe if you didn’t run off when I was trying to find a way to help your brother I wouldn’t be so pissed off.” Sammy grumbled. Rayne’s eyes narrowed.

‘Well excuse me for not being able to handle the sight of seeing him seizing like that.” She shot back. ‘You know I had to watch Mom do that before. Do you really blame me for not wanting to watch Parker go through the same?” Sammy didn’t answer her for a moment. Rayne just sighed in annoyance. ‘If you’re just gonna stand there giving me the silent treatment, then I’m going to go see my brother—”

‘He’s not who he’s trying to make himself out to be, Rayne.” Sammy cut her off. Rayne, who was in the act of walking away, turned back to him.

‘What did you say?” Sammy pushed off the wall and came closer to her, keeping his voice low.

‘Negan. He’s not who he’s painting himself to be.” He explained. ‘Sure, everything he says may sound all good and well, but it’s all to draw you in. Once you’re married to him, you can kiss your freedom goodbye. The girls he’s taken never come back down unless he’s punishing someone, otherwise, they are just like birds in a cage.” Rayne listened carefully, not looking away from him.

‘I’m not gonna tell you what to do; obviously, you’re a grown adult and can do what you want. But if you love your brother, you’ll say no.” Sammy warned. Rayne looked down from him to her feet, swallowing hard.

‘He saved me, Sammy.” She said quietly. ‘He saved me from those men.”

‘And I’m glad he got to you before anything bad happened. You don’t need a repeat performance of what happened in the mine. Neither of us does,” Sammy stopped right there. He never liked to linger on the thought of that night… ‘You’re my friend, Rayne. The only friend I got left now. I know you hate me over what happened back home; hell, I’d hate me too if I was you. But I hope you know that I care about you. Always have, always will.” Rayne glanced back up to him.

‘I want to see my brother now,” Rayne said, wanting this conversation to be over. Sammy nodded and led the way to the clinic, no words passing between either of them. Rayne walked ahead of him when they got closer, heading straight towards the prone form of Parker, who was thankfully now peacefully asleep.

‘Hey little dude,” she said with a smile, smoothing his hair back. Parker didn’t move. ‘Sissy’s back, just like I promised earlier this morning.” The child just kept his eyes closed, not even registering that Rayne was beside him. She sighed and held one of his hands in her own, feeling the heat coming off of him still.

‘Doc’s talking about setting up a room nearby for him.” Sammy said, leaning against the wall by the door. Rayne glanced to him, having never heard him come in. ‘I think that’s why he sent word to Negan.”

‘What about Hilltop?” Rayne asked. ‘Has he said anything more about that?” Sammy shook his head.

‘Before you ran off, he said that he was leaving it up to me and that he never heard anything we were talking about.” Sammy relayed, crossing his arms and staring off into space. ‘It’s up to you though. If you want me to arrange something, I can try, but I can’t make any promises that it’ll be soon.”

‘We don’t have that kind of time, Sammy,” Rayne replied, looking at Parker.

‘I know,” he answered. ‘That’s why I’ve been thinking about what you suggested earlier.” Rayne’s eyes looked up at him. ‘When you asked if there was a chance we could distract Negan.”

‘What about it?”

‘I’m thinking that if you’re right and he was preoccupied, then maybe we could get something worked out for Parker. Maybe if he had a bigger issue to worry about, we wouldn’t have to be concerned with sneaking around.” Sammy stopped suddenly and looked away. Rayne didn’t miss the look on his face.

‘What are you trying to say, Sammy?” he didn’t answer her. ‘Pretending you can’t hear me isn’t going to get you out of this.”

‘You wouldn’t like what I’m thinking anyway,” he admitted. ‘It’s not the best plan in the world anyway.”

‘Try me.” Rayne called, sitting back in her seat beside Parker and crossing her arms. Sammy gave her a sideways glance.

‘I’m serious, Rayne. It’s not something that you—”

‘Would you just rip the fucking bandaid off and tell me what’s on your mind?” Sammy sighed heavily and pushed off the wall, coming back to her side.

‘Alright, just don’t punch me for what I’m about to say,” he began. ‘You don’t have to go along with this, much less even agree with it. But just hear me out before you say anything.” Sammy hesitated, then continued. ‘You’re on your own, barely making it by working in the gardens. Not only that but if through some miracle Carson _does_ manage to find some seizure medicine, it’s gonna be even harder on you to not only provide Parker’s basic needs but also get his medicine. So I’m thinking… instead of you marrying Negan, you could marry me instead.” Rayne froze. ‘Or, at least, you say you’re married to me.

‘Now hear me out,” Sammy said, holding up both his hands when Rayne suddenly rose out of her seat, acting as though she’d jump over the exam table and launch herself at Sammy any minute. ‘We don’t have to seriously be married. We don’t even have to act like we’re married when we’re alone. But if Negan catches wind that he’s got competition when it comes to you… maybe that’ll provide enough of a distraction to get Parker moved. And in the meantime, I can help you get his medicine _and_ take care of you both at the same time.” There. It was out in the open. _Not the best plan in the world, but it’s better than nothing._

Rayne stared at him for a long time.

‘You’re saying that you want me to tell people that you and I are seeing each other, that we’re married. And that’s supposed to keep Negan occupied?” Sammy nodded.

‘Exactly. I mean, sure it’s a stretch but it’s better than nothing, right?”

‘Can you hear yourself right now?” Rayne asked, narrowing her eyes. ‘Like, can you really hear what you’re saying? Sammy, it’s insane. There’s no fucking way anyone in their right mind would buy that story, even if we did go through with it.”

‘It sounds crazy, I know,” Sammy replied. ‘But if it keeps you from slipping too far behind on points, then it’s something I’m willing to try.” He may have sounded brave, but inside Sammy’s stomach was turning. He knew this was a bigger, more dangerous game they were playing; if Rayne went along with this, he’d have a target on his back immediately, would likely even see himself face the same fate as Dwight and other men before him likely had. But if he turned the other cheek and let her continue to struggle, continue to be pursued…

It would only be a matter of time.

‘What the hell is wrong with you men?” Rayne asked suddenly, her voice cracking. Sammy blinked several times, realizing that Rayne was sitting down again with her head in her hands. ‘Why is it when a woman goes through something traumatic or even when they are already stressed out, all you men swoop in and try to use that? Why can’t you give us space to process what’s happening?”

‘Rayne,” he said, suddenly regretting everything he said. ‘Rayne, I’m not trying to take advantage of—”

‘Just stop!” Rayne yelled. ‘Just stop, Sammy,” she finished, raising her head with tears overflowing. ‘Please… I have the fucking world on my shoulders enough as it is. Parker is sick, and I damn near lost the only innocent thing I have left… so, please… stop. Just stop already before I lose my fucking mind.”

‘I’m not trying to take advantage of you right now, I swear!” Sammy persisted. ‘Why would you think that?”

‘That’s not what it looks like. Apparently all because I’m alone, everyone wants to swoop in and “save us” or “help us”, all because of Parker being sick or two assholes that don’t know how to keep their hands to themselves. First Negan, now you,” Rayne hissed. ‘Why can’t anyone tell that I just want to be alone? We were doing just fine before either of you showed up… All of you people just think it’s such a great game to push someone when they’re done, to take advantage of their vulnerability. Well, guess what? You can only push someone so far before they fucking snap.”

‘I just want to help you, Rayne!” Sammy argued. ‘Why can’t you see that?” Her silver eyes shot back up at him, anger brewing within them. Even from where he was standing, Sammy could clearly see Rayne shaking with barely contained rage.

‘Get out,” she snapped. ‘Just get out already. Get out of our lives, get out of my life, just get out.”

‘Rayne—”

‘GET. OUT.” She yelled again, pushing the metal table that was sitting at the end of the bed in his direction with a growl, making Sammy back off immediately. ‘Get out…and leave us alone.” Sammy watched her for a long moment, slowly backing away with his hands up.

‘Alright,” he muttered, edging for the door. ‘If and when you ever need me… all you have to do is call.” With those words Sammy disappeared out the door, not once looking back.

Rayne watched him leave, breathing hard from the adrenaline still coursing through her body before she collapsed back down to her chair, burying her face in her hands.

‘Damn you,” she muttered, gripping her hair tightly. ‘Damn you, Samuel Bailey.” Why did he have to say that? Why did he think she needed him? Why did he care so much? Rayne squeezed her eyes shut, her tears coming in far greater numbers as she barely contained her urge to scream in pure frustration.

Rayne had always been known for being the toughest amongst her friends. She never once let anyone see if something was wrong, never cracked under pressure. Hell, she never even cried once in front of anyone outside of her family before. Never until today.

Consumed by the stress of the day and torn apart by everything that she’d been told and endured, her tough exterior cracked…

And she broke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a difficult one for me to write because I had tried moving the interaction with Negan and Rayne to a different part, but my beta reader assured me that it was much needed to build up to Rayne finally breaking down. She's been strong up to this point, but like Rayne says, someone can only be pushed so far until they snap. 
> 
> I know this buildup is pretty slow and I'm super sorry. I really want to give everyone a chance to really get to know Rayne and really start to understand why she does things the way she does before I get into the grit of the story (I.E. The reason it's rated E). I hope that I've not been too long winded; I promise I'm going to make it up for you in the next chapter. It's not gonna be much, but it's gonna be a nice little taste of what's coming ;)
> 
> Please continue with the kind words and kudos! I can't begin to put into words how much it means and how encouraging it is =D


	5. What Dreams May Bring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A surprise visitor shows up after Rayne has a rather interesting dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lord have mercy, this took longer than I thought. I've been going through it life wise as well as getting ready for school to start back up AND getting settled into a new job. And then I saw the trailer for Season 10 of TWD (OUR BOY IS COMING BACK!!!) and got back to work XD
> 
> So just as a heads up for any younger readers or anyone who isn't a fan of such: this has a very -ehem- suggestive as hell dream sequence that's supposed to make up for the lack of sex so far (which is coming quicker than I thought it would. I know... that's what she said.) There will be more. I promise ;) If one were to see the notebook I have full of ideas, you'd think differently of me... ^_^;;
> 
> With that, please enjoy! (And don't say I never did anything for you. =D )

_Rayne shot up in bed, gasping and sweating like no tomorrow as she glanced around, fairly certain that her heart was about to beat straight out of her chest at the rate it was going. It was difficult to say what had made her jolt up the way she had, even more difficult to speak of what she'd just dreamed about. Rayne ran a hand through her burgundy hair, noticing for the first time that she was wearing an oversized white shirt, something she couldn't remember putting on. Now that she thought about it, she didn't really recall even_ owning _a white shirt like this. Rayne looked around her more thoroughly, realizing that she wasn't in her room anymore._

_From the looks of things, she was in a much more lavishly decorated one, where gray seemed to be the predominant color. The bed that she was laying on was a four-post one with several pillows along the head and she was covered in satin sheets. Lamps situated on either side of the bed gave off a golden glow, only illuminating where she was sitting and a bit at the foot of the bed. In truths, it wasn’t uncomfortable here. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt so comfortable in bed…_

_'You ok?" A voice came from the foot of the bed, making Rayne look up to see Negan dressed only in his white shirt and jeans leaning casually against one of the bedposts with a look of concern in his eyes. It should have shocked her that he was before her, even more that she would be in what had to be his room, but for reasons she couldn't explain, it just felt..._ right _, like she belonged here with him._

_Rayne didn't realize he was still talking to her._

_'Talk to Daddy, princess. Did you have a bad dream again?" he questioned, coming round to sit on her side of the bed and wrapping an arm around her front and effectively trapping her where she sat._

_'Yes Daddy," she said. Though it was indeed her voice, it didn't seem like her. Rayne had never called anyone Daddy before. Even her own father was only ever called Dad or Papa when she was younger!_

_But without controlling herself, Rayne continued. 'I had a really bad dream, Daddy." Negan came forward and kissed her forehead, drawing her into a comforting embrace._

_'Sweetheart," he murmured against her skin, stroking her burgundy hair. Negan didn't say anything for a moment, just brushed his lips over her face to soothe away the tears Rayne didn't realize had fallen. 'It's ok," Negan whispered. 'Daddy's here now. You're safe with me." Rayne sighed in relief, a smile coming to her face as a warm feeling spread through her body._ I'm safe with Daddy _, she thought to herself_. Daddy will protect me _. Her hands came up to either side of his neck, brushing her nose against his._

_'Daddy," she breathed. 'Make it go away, please." Negan smiled at her, a smile that seemed genuinely loving and not full of cruel joviality that she'd been accustomed to._

_'Is that how you ask for something from me, baby girl?" he asked, his meaning crystal clear to her as those wicked eyes danced in the light. Rayne pushed the blankets off of her and looked back up at him, biting her lower lip enticingly as she spread her legs slowly._

_'Please Daddy," she begged, never breaking eye contact with Negan who watched her like a hawk. 'Please make me feel better, Daddy. Make me feel good, please."_

_'There's my good girl," he praised, removing his shirt and discarding it onto the floor before climbing back on the bed, using one hand to push her back onto the pillows while his other pushed up her white nightshirt. Heat overcame Rayne as she watched him with hooded eyes, removing said shirt at his insistence to reveal her lithe body for him, a blush settling over her face as he drank in the sight of her olive skin. She felt shy for but a moment as his hands rubbed soothingly up her ribcage, but even that melted away when she saw only affection and admiration in his eyes._

_'Perfect," Negan murmured, Rayne's heart swelling at his voice. 'You are the epitome of sexy, princess. There's nothing more beautiful than you when you're all sprawled out on Daddy’s bed, being a good girl for me." Rayne smiled up at him, taking his hand in hers as it rubbed over her exposed skin, raising goosebumps all over her._

_'I'm your good girl, Daddy," Rayne replied. 'I've always been your good girl."_

_'My favorite good girl," Negan answered, crawling forward till he was covering her body with his, pinning both of her hands down on either side of her head. 'Show me why you're my favorite and let Daddy take care of you." With those words he captured her lips hungrily, Rayne mewling into his mouth as her body bucked up into him. She eagerly accepted his tongue into her mouth when it swiped across her lower lip, giggling quietly when his fingers tickled down her ribs after releasing her left wrist, continuing their journey until they reached the waistband of her white lacy panties. Rayne's back arched when his hand slipped inside, skilled fingers searching for the bundle of nerves that was already aching for his touch._

_'Damn, baby girl," Negan said against her lips, gliding his fingers through her wetness. Rayne cried out in pleasure, her head turning to the side as she writhed against him. 'You're fucking soaking and all I've done is kiss you. You must be hungry for Daddy right now."_

_'So hungry, Daddy," Rayne affirmed, her free hand holding his face to her neck when Negan began showering biting kisses up and down its length. 'I need you, Daddy, right now.”_

_'Yeah, you fucking do," Negan agreed, slipping his fingers inside her aching pussy. Rayne cried out wordlessly, holding onto him as though he were the only thing anchoring her in the world. 'Daddy hates seeing his princess upset, so Daddy's gonna fuck this pretty little pussy nice and hard, just. Like. This." Negan accentuated his words with a hard thrust of his fingers, Rayne's hips bucking up in response._

_'Negan,” she said. At the sharp look in his eyes, she quickly corrected herself. ‘Daddy… Please fuck me," she begged, wrapping her legs around Negan's waist, reaching for his belt buckle and biting her lips. 'I need you, please..."_

_'Music to my fucking ears," Negan growled, kissing her fiercely before releasing her hands to undo his belt quickly, Rayne's hands reaching to help him..._

Her silver eyes opened quickly, darting this way and that as she came back to the world of the waking, seeing that the room was flooded with the ethereal light of the moon. Rayne groaned quietly, her hands coming up to rub her eyes. Of course, she’d have _that_ dream again. She’d been doing everything in the world to keep it at bay, but no matter what she did, it always seemed to come back. Rayne wondered if it had anything to do with the recent events that had passed since Parker’s collapse.

It had been nearly two weeks since Carson had convinced Negan that it was best to get Parker set up in a room near the clinic, all so that he could be monitored during the day when Rayne was in the gardens. However, that had also led to Rayne deciding to move into the room with Parker, refusing to part with her little brother. Surprisingly, no one said anything to her about it. She was sure Carson would tell her no, but he had simply ignored her when she brought in their belongings. Not even the Saviors who had been setting up the room in the first place said anything, only looked at her once before going back to what they were doing.

Truth told, it wasn’t the best looking room in the world; it had a simple kitchen (just a sink and a toaster oven) nearby with a twin bed against the wall for Parker and another one situated on the other wall for Rayne; a rack for their clothes; a table and chairs; a bookshelf that held their food and Parker’s long-forgotten backpack; and one lamp. That was it- their little apartment. Their home. Rayne sighed at this. _Nothing will ever be home…_ She knew she should be grateful that they were still sheltered from the outside and finally had some privacy, but at the same time, Rayne could only find that she felt indifferent to it all.

She was beginning to understand why her father had chosen to treat the world as he did.

Parker whimpered in his sleep, taking Rayne by surprise as she jumped up and moved to his side. She smoothed his hair back, holding his little hand in her own.

‘Shh,” she soothed. ‘It’s ok. It’s ok, Parker.” At the sound of her voice, Parker settled back down, his breathing evening out again. Rayne breathed a sigh of relief. Thankfully, his fever had broken three days prior, and he was much more alert than before. His seizures, however, had not and even when she thought he was getting better, he would suddenly have another, giving her a scare each time with how much longer and more frequent they had become. Rayne frowned at this; Carson had assured her that seizure medication was a priority to look for whenever scavengers would go out, but each time they had, said scavengers were always empty-handed.

It was after the fourth time of such that Rayne felt herself beginning to lose hope.

So she resolved herself to just make Parker comfortable, to make life as livable as she could while still providing his basic needs for him, something which- as Sammy had predicted- was becoming increasingly difficult, even with all the extra side jobs she did for others as well as picking up extra work around the gardens until someone else was sent to replace Morris.

At the thought of Sammy, she paused, remembering well the last heated conversation they had. Sure, he’d tried to talk to her again, tried to come back around and apologize but she’d dismissed him simply with silence, refusing to acknowledge he was there. After a few days, well… he eventually got the message. Now, occasionally, she’d see him up on the catwalks or passing by him to the canteen or even if she was out in the gardens and he happened to be supervising. He’d give her a small smile, sometimes a wave, but Rayne would always ignore him.

If only it had been that easy to avoid Negan.

After their talk, Negan had given Rayne space to think about what he was offering as well as to piece herself back together after what happened with Morris and Terrance. But every once in awhile, he’d casually pass by her when she took Parker to Carson’s office for a checkup, would brazenly walk in and strike up a conversation with Carson about Parker’s recovery. He’d even started talking to Parker himself, keeping him amused while Carson checked the little boy over. Often times, for no reason at all, he would come to the gardens and just walk around it, acting as though he were inspecting everything though Rayne thought otherwise seeing how he would often be in close vicinity of her. It wouldn’t surprise her if he was keeping tabs on them, just as she wouldn’t be surprised if Negan had had something to do with the fact of her being allowed to share a room with Parker.

It was heartwarming really to see him interact with Parker, who was completely oblivious to what Negan had done to their friends and father or even their community. Parker had even started looking forward to going to the doctor, always innocently asking if Negan would be there or if he’d see him again soon. At least Parker seemed to be ok with Negan.

But Rayne being Rayne, she just had to know more about him.

It was well established around the Sanctuary that Negan had multiple wives, and while she had nothing against that, Rayne had decided that if that were indeed the case, then there was bound to be some people who knew exactly what their lives were like. She told herself it was pure curiosity though another part of her would argue that it was because she was _actually_ considering his offer. Nonetheless, those she’d talked to- namely a few of the older, more senior female Sanctuary residents- backed up Sammy’s claim.

The women who’d Negan had approached about becoming his wife and said yes indeed had never returned down here, though they would occasionally be seen once in a while with an escort heading to either the doctor or to the library. As for what they did up there, none of them knew, but one had directed her to the head laundry lady who relayed all she could.

All the wives were given special privileges such as having their own rooms, better food and clothes, as well as other goods brought in from the outposts, communities, and other areas that the Saviors controlled. They didn’t appear to have any real obligations outside of being loyal to Negan and whatever else he had them do. Seeing the look of disgust in the woman’s face was all Rayne needed to know what she meant. Rayne had taken a break after learning everything to process it all, a task made more challenging considering…

Rayne had a hard time looking at Negan sometimes. She had a harder time _not_ looking at him too, something which she knew made no sense at all, but it was hard to miss him when he was always finding a reason to linger close to her no matter where she was. Rayne wondered if it was his way of reminding her of what he’d asked her, clearly giving her opportunities to approach him with an answer. In all truths, she caught herself sometimes wanting to go near him, wanting to give him an affirmative, but just when Rayne thought she’d actually do it, the images of her friends or her father’s shocked expression would come back to haunt her, a reminder it seemed to not get too close.

It was becoming increasingly difficult though. Just the thought of being near him sent chills down her spine and filled her belly with those pleasant butterflies. She wished she could say that was the only thing that went through her mind when she saw him but--

‘Sissy?” Parker’s voice came, and for the first time, Rayne realized that he was awake.

‘Parker, is something wrong? Do you feel sick again?” she asked immediately, ready to run and grab the doctor should he say yes. Parker just shook his head, scooting closer to Rayne who put an arm over him protectively. ‘Then why aren’t you asleep? You should be resting.”

‘I had a dream,” he began quietly, his silver eyes meeting the identical orbs of his sister. ‘I dreamed about Mommy.” Rayne’s face grew solemn. He’d been having dreams of Isabella for some time now, long before they came to the Sanctuary. She didn’t believe he’d ever fully understand why she wasn’t around anymore, though he had asked her once or twice if Isabella was a “monster” as he called the Walkers. Rayne had always assured him that that wasn’t the case, just that Isabella was watching over them both no matter where they were.

‘What was it about?” Rayne asked, smoothing back his hair.

‘I saw her in the flowers,” he began. ‘Mommy was walking in the pink flowers in a pretty blue dress.” Tears filled his eyes. ‘Mommy said she misses me and loves me.” He started to cry, clutching to Rayne who held him gently in her arms. ‘I want Mommy… I miss Mommy…”

‘I know, buddy, I know,” Rayne whispered against his hair. ‘I miss her too. More than anything.” She held him for a long moment. ‘But she loved you so very much. She loved us both more than anything in the world, and I know she is so proud of how brave you are, how much you’ve grown.” Parker grew silent, sniffling against her.

‘Is Mommy in Heaven?” he suddenly asked, taking her by surprise. ‘Is that why Mommy isn’t here?”

‘Yes Parker,” Rayne admitted. ‘Mommy’s in Heaven… watching us both.” She felt a smile come to her face. ‘You know, if you see someone you love in your dreams when they aren’t there, it means they are coming to visit you to make sure you’re happy.”

‘So Mommy came back to see me?” He innocently asked.

‘Of course. You’re her little boy, why wouldn’t she want to come and see you?” Rayne explained, snuggling him close. Parker smiled at the contact with his sister, burying his little face in her shoulder.

‘Sissy?” he asked again.

‘What’s up little dude?” Rayne answered, looking down at him. Parker was quiet for a minute.

‘I’m sorry…” She blinked in surprise.

‘For what? You don’t have anything to be sorry for, Parker.” Parker shook his head.

‘Yes I do…” he argued. ‘I’m sorry I’m sick… I’m sick like Mommy was.” Rayne gasped quietly.

‘Parker, never apologize for that!” she replied, pulling back and putting both of her hands on either of his cheeks. ‘It’s not your fault that you’re sick. Never think that it is.”

‘But Sissy,” he protested. ‘You always have work and I’m always here with Doctor. It’s my fault you’re tired.” Rayne stared deep in his eyes, seeing the hurt that danced within his silver orbs. It blew her away that even as young as he was, he was so perceptive of everything around him.

 _He’s wise beyond his years,_ her father’s voice whispered in her mind.

‘Parker,” Rayne began. ‘Just seeing that you are better, even if you don’t feel like you are, means everything to me. To know that you have food, clothes, blankets, medicine… that’s all I need to keep going. You are more important to me than rest or anything else, ok?” Her thumbs wiped away the stray tears that fell from his eyes. ‘So don’t worry about Sissy, ok? I promised Mommy that I would take care of you. You just focus on getting stronger than ever, and I’ll take care of everything else, alright?” Parker regarded her quietly for a moment.

‘Okay Sissy,” he replied, hugging Rayne tightly. She smiled against his hair, smoothing it with one hand as she held him with the other. ‘I love you, Rayne.”

‘I love you too, Parker,” she replied, pressing a kiss to his cheek. ‘Go to sleep, ok? You got to go see the doctor tomorrow.” Rayne laid her brother down, tucking him back in before he grabbed her hand.

‘Can you sing me a song first?” he asked. Rayne looked to him in surprise. ‘Can you sing Mommy’s song?” Oh… that one. Rayne knew what he meant without asking further, though it unnerved her slightly that he would request it. Her mother had sung it to them quite frequently, a lullaby or folk song (Rayne never figured out which it was considered) that had been passed down to her by her mother and grandmother. Isabella had told her before it was written by a young girl who had been taken away from her family and forced to work for a rich household as a baby-sitter and sang the song in remembrance of her home.

Not exactly one Rayne would sing to kids before bed, but…

‘Alright,” Rayne began, sitting back down beside him. ‘But just one. And no complaining if it sounds horrible or wrong.”

‘Ok, Sissy,” Parker promised. Rayne sighed; she hoped her Japanese was still good enough to get the words right this time around.

‘ _Unwilling baby-sitting, Thinking of days after mid-summer Bon festival. Then a flurry of cold snow continues, and a baby’s repeating cries_ ,” Rayne began, keeping her voice soft as she sang, the memory of her mother’s beautiful voice coming to the front of her mind. The more she sang, the more memories came to her;

_Her mother and father taking them to a festival in town, her mother suggesting they travel to Japan to see what she called a real festival…_

_Waking up in a cold sweat, panicking over a nightmare only to be calmed by Isabella’s gentle singing as she calmed Rayne down…_

_An infant Parker’s cries echoing throughout the house, so loud she woke up too only to find Isabella right there, holding him and singing softly…_

_Traveling to Japan, to her mother’s village in Kyoto and meeting the other half of her family…_

_Walking down a lane filled with thousands of cherry blossoms, both of them dressed in matching yukatas…_

_Isabella telling her that she’d stopped chemotherapy all to spend her last days with her daughter, her heart walking outside of her body…_

‘ _Wishing to get back home in a hurry across the border. That’s my parents’ home which can be seen far away. That’s my parents’ home which can be seen far away._ ” Rayne finished, ignoring the tears in her eyes from the memories. She composed herself and looked down at Parker, seeing he was now fast asleep. A smile came to Rayne’s face.

‘Still works like a charm,” she whispered, leaning down to kiss Parker’s head.

‘Beautiful.” Rayne froze as she was leaning up at the sound of that unexpected voice. She turned slowly, moving like a stone grinding on another to see that there was indeed someone in the room, sitting quietly in one of the nearby chairs.

‘Negan?” she whispered in surprise. He smiled at her, leaning back in his seat.

‘Never took you for a singer, darling,” Negan observed just as quietly, looking over at Parker. ‘Knocked that kid of yours right out. Damn near knocked me out too.” She blushed and looked back at Parker, tucking him in more fully. ‘That something your mother used to sing to you?”

‘Yeah,” she replied, brushing a stray bit of hair behind Parker’s ear. ‘It’s something she learned in Japan.”

‘Hmm,” he replied, leaning forward to rest his forearms on the table. ‘Figures why I couldn’t understand shit.” Negan laughed quietly, something Rayne didn’t reciprocate. ‘Still, it was a beautiful song. You should sing more often.” Rayne shook her head, coming over to the other chair across from him and sitting down with a sigh, trying to ignore the butterflies that were threatening to overtake her. She really didn’t want to be near him at the moment, seeing as that dream of hers was still lingering in the back of her mind, but at the same time…

‘I never wanted to be a singer,” she admitted, forcing herself to carry on a conversation. ‘My mom tried to get me to be a musician like her but… it’s just not my forte. I always preferred art over music.” Negan’s eyebrows went up at this.

‘You draw?” She nodded. ‘Paint?”

‘Yeah,” Rayne answered. ‘I was an art major before all this.” She got very quiet after this. ‘Dad never liked it, but Mom did. She always bought art supplies for me when I was in school, told me to ignore him and just focus on making myself happy.” Rayne stopped herself from rambling. Negan hadn’t said anything, just let her talk.

‘What do you like to paint, darling?” She glanced at him in surprise; she didn’t take him for someone that would be interested in art. How long had it even been since _anyone_ showed an interest in her art?

‘Before, I liked to do surrealism and abstract art, but Mom loved flowers, so I’d paint flowers for her and fish for Parker if he asks for it. Really I can draw just about anything.” Rayne explained. ‘I haven’t painted in so long I don’t think I’d remember how.” She stopped again. ‘I’m guessing that’s not why you snuck in here though.” Negan’s smile grew.

‘That’s my Rayne-y girl,” he praised. ‘Perceptive as always!” Negan stood up from his chair and walked closer to Rayne who just looked up at him inquisitively. He locked eyes with her for a solid minute or two before speaking again. ‘You’ve been avoiding me again.” She blinked in confusion. ‘I’ve been such a nice guy, getting you and Parker all squared away, making sure you are doing alright without any fuckers trying to swoop in on my Rayne-y girl, and you still haven’t come up to me.” Rayne bit her lip and looked away. _You knew it would eventually come to this,_ a little voice reminded her.

‘I’m not ungrateful for any of that if that’s what you’re getting at,” Rayne answered, deciding that to be the safest. Her suspicions had been right after all with Negan being the reason she and Parker were in this room. As for the other part…

It never occurred to her that wherever she went nowadays, men were giving her a wide berth, almost as though they were afraid of something.

‘Of course, you’re not, sweetheart,” Negan agreed, a hand coming to her chin to make her look up at him. ‘You’ve been working your fine ass off again for all them points and you’re _still_ not using any on yourself.” Rayne gasped a little at this. ‘Yeah, don’t think I haven’t been noticing you putting Parker before you.” He chuckled at this. ‘You’re really something else, you know that? I’d expect most girls your age to be crying over things they missed, not doing jack shit. But you’re taking care of a kid better than I see most adults do.”

‘I’m not that young,” Rayne admitted. ‘I’m only nineteen. At least I think I still am, anyways.” Honestly, she knew she looked young, but really… Negan’s eyebrows raised at this.

‘Shit, nineteen?” Rayne nodded. ‘And taking care of a kid all on your own?”

‘Pretty much.”

‘Damn,” Negan exclaimed quietly. ‘You’re not just hot as fuck, but you work hard _and_ you’re independent.” He licked his lower lip, obviously enjoying this new bit of information. ‘Is that why you’re playing hard to get?” Her lips parted a little as she was taken aback.

‘I wasn’t—”

‘Shh,” he whispered, putting a finger to her lips. ‘None of that, Rayne-y girl.” Negan leaned down to whisper in her ear, his voice dropping slightly. ‘I’m not blind, sweetheart. I’ve seen how you’ve been acting when I come around- you pretend like you don’t notice me, but I’ve seen you stealing looks at me, biting your lip like some dirty fucking thought crossed your mind.” His breath was hot against her ear and neck, sending chills down her spine. She tried to keep her breathing evened out, but she couldn’t stop the little sounds that escaped when one of his hands pulled her up and out of her chair, standing her up in front of him all the while staying low enough to stay right by her ear.

‘You can’t tell me you don’t look at me and think of all the fucked up things I can do to you… that you can do to me.” He murmured suggestively, running both hands up and down her sides. Rayne could do little more than just stand there, trembling slightly at the contact. ‘You don’t think about how you could bite my neck, tease me, stroke me? You’ve seen what I did to your friends, what I did to those fuckers a while back. Imagine what I could do to you.” Rayne took a shaky breath in, and with it, she became all too aware of how he smelled. Aftershave, cologne, some kind of spicy scent she couldn’t quite place… all three combined together in one hypnotic scent, one that indeed made her weak in the knees. _It’s too much_ , her mind echoed. _It’s too much_ …

Everything in her mind vanished in an instant when Negan pressed a kiss to her cheek, working his way down to her neck. Rayne gasped quietly, her hands coming up to grab his jacket lapels tightly. Negan chuckled darkly at her response, those strong arms coming around her to hold her to him as he continued his teasing, leaving biting kisses here and there as he worked his way back up her neck. By the time he pulled back to look in Rayne’s face, her cheeks were flushed red, those full lips parted slightly and her alluring eyes had seemingly begun to glow in the moonlight.

They stared at one another for a brief moment before Negan lowered his lips down to Rayne’s, pressing them gently against her. She startled slightly, pulling back slightly before he pulled her right back in, one hand on the back of her head tangling in her hair. Rayne’s head swam as his lips moved against hers, her knees threatening to give out were it not for Negan holding her up. Slowly, very slowly, she began to move her lips in response, matching the pattern he set. One hand came up to his face, resting on his cheek as he tilted his head to coax her lips to part, slipping in that devilish tongue and stealing what remained of Rayne’s sanity.

Rayne felt weak as he continued plundering her mouth with his tongue, her own slipping into his mouth alongside it. It felt like she was back in that dream, that wonderful dream that was a sharp contrast to the nightmares she’d had before. Her entire body felt as though it had been set on fire at his roaming hands against her back, one dipping down to grab a palmful of her ass. Rayne moaned against his mouth, not realizing that he had backed her up against one of the walls until her back collided against it, Negan never once breaking the kiss.

After an eternity, it seemed, he finally drew back and looked down at Rayne, her eyes opening without her realizing that they’d closed in the first place as her breath tore in and out of her, her trembling threatening to take over her.

‘I’ve wanted to do that since the first time I saw you,” he muttered, smirking at the expression on Rayne’s face. ‘You’re acting like you’ve never been kissed before.”

‘Not like that,” Rayne admitted. How long had it even been since she’d been kissed? ‘That a bad thing?”

‘Fuck no, Rayne-y girl,” Negan chuckled, resting his hands on her hips. ‘I don’t judge. I’ve kissed a lot of women but you, my dear, blow every goddamn one of them out of the water.”

‘I don’t know about that. I’m not as experienced or as good looking as those other women are or were.” Rayne admitted. It was true; she was lucky to have gotten her first kiss years ago, though said person would argue that it was a heat of the moment thing seeing as they were just as inexperienced as she was. She hadn’t even had a boyfriend at this point…

‘Cut that shit out,” Negan growled, a fierce look in his eyes. ‘I already told you you’re super hot, especially with those eyes of yours.” His hand cupped her chin to make her hold his stare, Negan’s leather-clad thumb brushing over her lower lip. ‘You are fucking _breath-taking_.” He added, stealing another kiss from her. Rayne returned his kiss, resting her hands on his neck and pressing herself into him. ‘Fuck, Rayne-y girl. Why don’t you just fucking marry me already?” _Of course,_ Rayne thought as they parted again, Negan resting his head against hers. _Of course, he’d ask that again._

Well, he _did_ say he’d come to her if she wouldn’t come to him…

When Rayne’s gaze shifted to the sleeping form of her brother, and then back to him, Negan caught on to what was going through her mind.

‘You’re worried he’ll be out here on his own.” He said, bringing her eyes back to him. Rayne nodded quietly.

‘He’s all I have left now,” Rayne said. ‘He still has seizures and the doctor isn’t sure what’s causing them. So far the scavengers haven’t been able to find the medicine he needs…” She stopped herself from going farther. Rayne didn’t want sympathy, just for him to understand why.

‘That shit is hard to scavenge, Rayne-y girl,” Negan said, stroking the back of his hand down her face. ‘And it’s gonna put you in the hole for points.” A shadow of worry clouded Rayne’s eyes at his words, her gaze shifting back to her brother. ‘I don’t want to take you away from him, baby,” Negan assured her, bending so that he could whisper in her ear when she turned her face towards Parker. ‘I’m giving you a way to keep taking care of him without neglecting yourself.” Tears came to Rayne’s eyes; not at Negan’s words, but at a most terrible thought that had crossed her mind.

‘I won’t be able to take care of him anymore if he dies from this,” she said in a quiet voice. Concern crossed Negan’s face at the tears in her eyes.

‘Shh,” he murmured, kissing her temple soothingly as Rayne began trembling. ‘That’s not gonna happen. I’m not gonna let that fucking happen. We’ll get him fixed up good. He’ll be his damn good self again, be a damn good kid.”

‘How?” Rayne cried quietly, willing herself not to fall apart only to fail. ‘How can anyone fix him if no one knows what’s going on with him?” Negan gave her a strange look at this.

‘What do you mean no one knows what’s going on with him?” Rayne hesitated for a moment. _Stop, just stop,_ her mind ordered. _You don’t need him. You’ve been doing fine this entire time._

Barely scraping by isn’t doing fine, and Parker having seizures back to back wasn’t doing fine either.

‘Carson,” she elucidated. ‘He said he has an idea of what’s causing it but he doesn’t know for sure.” Negan’s eyes hardened at her revelation.

‘So he’s not doing a damn thing,” Negan assumed, his entire body tensing in anger. Noticing this, Rayne looked back at him. That look in his eyes was exactly the same as when he killed Morris and Terrance.

It was the same look he had when he almost killed her father…

_‘Anyone moves, anyone says anything, cut a finger off and feed it to the German asshole and then we'll start. You can blink, you can breathe, you can cry. Hell, you're all gonna be doing some of that." With those words, Negan brought Lucille down over Coby's head, blood spurting as he brought Lucille back up. Coby hit the ground in an instant, a look of shock on his face…_

_‘Fuck you!” Celeste had screamed at him, lunging at Negan with her knife in hand before Lucille cracked open her skull…_

_Dallas._

_Han Woo._

_Trevor._

‘He’s doing what he can,” Rayne quickly said, pushing the faces of her friends out of her mind. ‘It’s not his fault that he doesn’t have a way to know for sure.” She added, hoping it was enough to save another person from sharing their fates. Rayne wasn’t sure she could have another death on her conscience. Negan looked at her, his hazel eyes roaming over her face several times before they looked over to the sleeping child just a few feet away.

‘Will you marry me if he does?” Negan asked suddenly, taking Rayne off guard. ‘If I fucking find someone that does know what’s wrong with him and gets him better, will you marry me?” Rayne opened her mouth to say something, only to snap her head towards Parker at the sounds of his bed shaking.

‘Parker!” She cried out, rushing to his side as a violent seizure took over the boy, Negan right on her heels. Remembering what Carson had told her, Rayne immediately unbuttoned his shirt to keep it from choking him and moved anything away that could hurt him, Negan helping her quickly. It only lasts a few seconds, Rayne reminded herself. It’ll pass, it’ll pass…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those curious, the name of the song that Rayne is singing is called Lullaby of Takeda. There's several different translations as well as many different variations on where the song came from, so I went with the most popular of the bunch. It's a very beautiful song that you should definitely check out!
> 
> Life is about to get crazy again with my fall semester starting up, but I'll do my best to keep uploading in a timely manner! Thank you all for the kudos and kind words again! You all are absolutely amazing!


	6. Torn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After another scare with Parker's seizures, Rayne finds herself conflicted and Sammy is questioned by Negan about his affiliation with Rayne.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear oh dear... this took so much longer than I expected D= You gotta love it when school and work waste no time in piling stuff on ya. (Anyone who'd like to volunteer to take over for me will be compensated with coffee and anything sweet. Just don't mind Neely the cat XD)
> 
> This is much shorter than the other chapters, but I'm going to make up for that. I think you deserve something a little more than what I gave you in the last chapter because you're awesome and I've tortured you enough with the waiting. ;D
> 
> 9/23/19: I realized that Sammy and Negan haven't come face to face yet and threw in an extra scene at the end.

When it didn’t pass, she damn near panicked.

‘It’s getting worse!” Rayne cried, horror nearly overcoming her as she held Parker’s left arm, hoping the sensation of such would make it stop. ‘It’s never lasted this long before!” When it didn’t subside, her silver eyes darted to Negan.

‘Goddammit,” Negan cursed, rushing to her door. ‘One of you sorry shits wake the fuck up and get Carson’s sorry ass in here!” he bellowed down the hall. When no one came out, Negan quickly added, ‘If he ain’t in here in the next five fucking seconds, I’m ironing the first fucker I see!”

At his threat, several people came sprinting out and into the direction of the doctor’s room. Seconds later, Carson came running in with his bag. It was evident by the look in his eyes that he’d been in a dead sleep, but he quickly pushed it to the side seeing the convulsing child.

‘What’s wrong with him?” Rayne asked. ‘Why isn’t it going away?”

‘I don’t know,” Carson said, moving Parker to the floor quickly with Rayne’s help. ‘I’ve never seen one last this long.” Her panic doubled tenfold when Parker started choking, his eyes rolling to the back of his head.

‘My God,” Rayne cried as she turned her brother’s head to the side. ‘What…”

‘He’s choking on his own vomit,” Carson exclaimed, opening Parker’s tensed mouth to let as much out of the child’s mouth as possible. ‘His body is trying to go into shock!” Quickly, he grabbed his bag, digging through it for something.

‘So fucking do something!” Negan ordered, coming to Rayne’s side. ‘You’re a goddamn doctor aren’t you?” Carson jumped but otherwise located what he was looking for and drew out a vial and a needle.

‘Hold his arm steady!” Carson said, Rayne moving to do as he said before Negan stopped her to do it himself, holding Parker’s right arm down long enough for Carson to inject the boy quickly and remove the needle. The seizure lasted a moment more before Parker’s convulsions began to slow down before disappearing altogether, his body stilling finally. Carson pulled out his stethoscope and checked Parker’s vitals, Rayne sitting anxiously before him.

‘Is he ok?” She asked, still trembling. ‘Please tell me he’s ok.”

‘His heart rate and breathing are slowing down gradually,” Carson reported before checking the boy’s pulse. ‘Pulse is elevated, but it’s coming down too.” He removed his stethoscope and put it around his neck. ‘What was he doing when it started?”

‘He was sleeping,” Rayne informed him. ‘He was sleeping fine and then…” she couldn’t continue. Carson understood immediately.

‘If he’s having seizures in his sleep, then he’s worse off than I initially thought.” Carson began. ‘The longer he goes on like this, the more his condition will deteriorate.” Rayne gasped, looking at him in shock.

‘You mean… he’ll die?” She asked. Carson nodded somberly. ‘Then do something! Please! You’re supposed to be a doctor for crying out loud! You told me your responsibility is to your patients and Parker is one of them! You can’t just let him die!”

‘I never said I was going to let him die, Rayne, I’m doing all I can with the resources I have available.” Carson argued. ‘There’s only so much-”

Both Carson and Rayne jumped when Negan grabbed Carson by the collar of his shirt, jerking him roughly.

‘You will do your _job,_ ” Negan said in a dangerous voice. ‘You will do your job and save this kid’s fucking life. Do I need to fucking remind you what _happens_ when you don’t follow the _rules_?” Carson visibly shuddered and shook his head. Negan released him roughly.

‘Then you will do _exactly_ whatever the fuck Rayne asks you to,” he began. ‘You can’t figure out what the fuck’s going on, you fucking find a way to figure it out. You need something special? You come to me.” Carson’s eyes darted from Negan to Rayne before he cleared his throat.

‘I have a suspicion that he has encephalitis, but I can’t know for sure without an EEG or blood work. Hilltop is the only place I know that has the equipment I need to be sure.” At these words, Rayne cast him a strange look then realized what the doctor was doing, or likely what he had been doing this entire time…

_He’s going to get him out of here,_ she thought. _The only way he could get Parker the help he needed was if he got worse!_ It didn’t sit well with her that if that were indeed the case that he would let Parker get to this point, but at the same time, she understood.

_Still doesn’t make it right._

She quieted her mind to focus on what he was saying to Negan.

‘I’m more than willing to continue his care, but he has a much better chance of recovering if he’s with someone that can properly diagnose him and treat him in a more specialized environment.” Carson continued, not missing the look in Rayne’s eyes. They shared a stare, and she was more than certain that he could see the gratitude in Rayne’s eyes, though she still had to contain herself from asking why he waited all this time.

‘Then why wait to bring it up until now?” Rayne asked, choosing to play along with the doctor’s plan. The way Carson looked at her only solidified what she’d suspected. She only hoped that Negan hadn’t caught on that something was going on. ‘You could have said something to me earlier!”

‘I told you before, I won’t treat him for an illness that I’m not even sure he has. I didn’t want to give you false hope,” Carson replied.

‘Then why didn’t you fucking come to me?” Negan questioned, reminding them that they weren’t alone. Carson swallowed audibly.

‘I was hoping that if I continued to monitor him or if seizure medication was found that he would end up making a recovery from this. As it is, I don’t think medication will be enough to get him back to a healthy state. I’d like to send him to Hilltop where they can do far more than I can, but I’ll need Rayne to be on board with this too.” He explained. There, now it was out in the open. Rayne chewed on her lower lip, smoothing her little brother’s hair out of his face as she waited for an answer from Negan.

So engrossed in watching her brother, Rayne didn’t realize that Negan had started speaking to her.

‘Rayne-y girl, you alright with Parker getting sent to Hilltop?” He asked her, anger still lacing his voice. Rayne nodded quickly, trying to hide her desperation. Negan turned his attention back to Carson, who watched this unfold quietly.

‘Ok then Doc, get this kid on back to your office and do your thing. I want him in the best shape for tomorrow when we ship him out to Hilltop.”

‘Yes sir,” Carson replied, moving to gather up Parker into his arms with Rayne’s help. She stood with him, following him to the door and opening it for him. As she did, her breath caught slightly in her throat when she noticed Sammy and another Savior lingering outside the door, likely ready to deal with a Walker judging by the guns they had in their hands. Realizing there was no danger, they relaxed, Sammy catching her gaze as he looked from her to Carson then back to Rayne with a questioning look. Rayne just looked away from him and watched Carson disappear with Parker before closing the door slowly, leaving her alone with Negan once again.

‘You gonna be alright in here by yourself, Rayne-y girl?” He asked, walking closer to her with his hands in his pockets. Rayne didn’t answer him as she rested her head against the wooden door, trying to gather herself.

‘What’s on your mind, sweetheart?” Negan asked in a soft voice, taking one of her hands in his, an act that made Rayne turn slightly towards him. Rayne exhaled shakily, trying to find the words she was looking for. She’d been fighting back against crying, not wanting to fall apart in front of Negan a second time tonight, but a most awful thought kept creeping into her mind, one that brought with it the memories of her mother…

‘I’m scared,” She finally admitted. ‘I’m scared I’ll lose him…”

‘Rayne-y girl,” Negan said, stroking her hand softly as the war she waged against herself was lost and she burst into tears. ‘Come here,” he added, pulling her into his arms in a soothing embrace.

‘I can’t lose him.” Rayne sobbed, fisting her hands in his leather jacket. ‘I can’t lose him like I lost Mom…”

‘You won’t lose him, baby. I’m not gonna let that happen.”

‘No… I will. She had the same thing,” Rayne argued. ‘She did the same exact thing every single day, right in front of me and there was nothing I could do to stop it. And now it’s happening again.” Negan said nothing, only let her get everything out of her system, resting his chin on her head.

‘Shh,” he soothed as she continued crying, holding onto him like he was the only person keeping her anchored in the world. ‘It’s ok, Rayne-y girl. It’s all gonna be ok, I promise.” Rayne rested her head against his chest, her sobs gradually coming to a stop with only the occasional sniffle from her. Still, Negan didn’t release her, just held her until Rayne decided to pull back slightly, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand.

‘Feel better?” he asked, brushing back the hair that had fallen in Rayne’s face. She nodded quietly, feeling awkward all over again.

‘I’m sorry…” Rayne started, looking down again. Negan rose a hand up to cup her chin, turning her face back up to him. ‘You have more important things to worry about than me crying like that…”

‘Don’t even fucking go there,” Negan growled. ‘You got some heavy fucking shit going on right now. Don’t fucking apologize for letting everything out, unless you make it a habit.”

‘I won’t, don’t worry,” Rayne quickly said. ‘I just don’t want to be a burden or—”

‘Fucking fuck, Rayne,” Negan cut her off. ‘I already made it fucking clear to you that I care about you and your brother, haven’t I? Hell, I’ve done more than enough to prove you ain’t no fucking burden on me.” His tone of voice made her stop, looking down and away immediately. Negan sighed heavily, resting both hands on her shoulders.

‘Look at me.” He ordered. Rayne hesitated for a moment, the hardness in his voice making her wary.

‘Negan, I—”

‘Shh, look at me.” Negan said again, his tone discouraging her from disobeying his command. Rayne took a breath and brought her silver gaze up to his hazel ones, taken aback by the fiery look within his. ‘I want to make this perfectly clear to you; you are _not_ a burden. Don’t you ever fucking think you are, cause if you were, I would have already kicked your ass to the fucking curb. Whoever put that fucking idea in your head that crying makes you a burden can eat a damn dick for even insinuating that shit.” Rayne didn’t look away as he spoke, obediently listening to his every word before his hand resumed what was becoming an almost constant position under her chin. ‘But listen to me; you’re special to me. Hell, I’m sure I’ve made it pretty fucking clear that I got a thing for you, been feeling a certain kinda way for you. You need something? All you gotta do is ask me and I’ll do it.”

‘But only if I marry you in return,” Rayne finished, realizing where this was all leading back to. Negan just held her stare at this. Rayne looked down and away from him, chewing her lip again. Call her proud and stubborn, but she was beginning to believe that there wasn’t going to be any getting around this. It was gradually becoming an elephant in the room whenever he was around and Negan had been more than adamant that he was going to get an answer out of her even if he had to come to her.

_Would it really be so bad to just give in?_

It felt like it would, but the current way that things were going, and the worse Parker got…

She didn’t realize that Negan was talking to her.

‘If you’re worried that you’ll never see your brother again, then I’m gonna burst that fucking bubble right now; I’d never take him away from you for good. Hell, I’ll even let you visit him now and then to see how he’s coming along. And once he’s back on his feet, he’ll come right back here to be with you,” Negan said. Rayne glanced back up at him at the mention of Parker. 

_He saved you._

‘What about Hilltop? Will they be good to him?” she asked.

‘They damn well better be,” Negan affirmed. ‘I catch wind that they aren’t and--” at the look in Rayne’s eyes, he stopped himself. ‘I’ll be paying them a visit to find out why the fuck they’re slacking off.” Rayne nodded slightly.

_He’s saving Parker._

‘You won’t get a better opportunity to get him better than this, Rayne-y girl.” Negan said, as though sensing her apprehension. ‘I already told you that I’ll get him back on his feet. As for you, I’ll treat you like a damn queen. You wouldn’t be struggling for points or starving yourself just for him. Anything you want from me, I’ll do it for you. Long as you be my wife and do what I say, I’ll always take good care of you.” Her silver eyes searched his enchanting hazel eyes, seeing the sincerity within them. Another light danced within them, one that sent chills of both sorts through her body, but Rayne ignored them.

_He can’t be completely evil if he did that for you._

_Everything for Parker._

‘And your other wives?” Rayne asked, not realizing those words had come out until it was too late to call them back.

‘What about them?”

‘Won’t they get jealous if you bring in another girl?” Rayne inquired. Negan simply laughed at this, something that made Rayne feel stupid for even asking.

‘Baby girl, don’t fucking worry about any jealousy. There’s plenty of Negan to go around to all of you.” He chuckled again at this. ‘So, are you gonna say yes or do I have to lie to my diary?” Rayne narrowly caught herself from giggling at the insinuation; Negan keeping a diary. Now that was a mental image that was going to be hard to get rid of.

‘Didn’t take you for the journaling type,” she said quietly. When her silver eyes looked up at him, she couldn’t help but be taken aback by the look on his face. ‘What is it?”

‘Is that a smile I see coming to your face, Rayne-y girl?” He asked her, almost sounding dumbfounded as a smile of his own cut across his handsome face. Not the cruel smile that she’d seen several times before, not the provocative one he gave when he asked her to marry him, but a genuine smile, one that hinted that there was good in him after all. ‘Are you about to crack a smile? Have I worked myself up to a smile from you?” Rayne blinked several times, not realizing that she’d been so close to doing so.

How long had it been since another person besides Parker had made her smile?

_He’s not as bad as you thought he was._

‘I guess so,” Rayne admitted, finally letting her lips completely curl up gently, looking up at him again.

‘Damn,” Negan exclaimed, looking quite pleased with himself. ‘You’re already smoking fucking hot, but you’re even hotter when you smile like that.” His gaze grew darker as he leaned down to whisper in her ear. ‘Do you smile like that when you’re getting fucked?” It should have unnerved her that he so brazenly asked her that, that he was clearly taking advantage of the situation.

Instead, it just sent heat spiraling straight to her core.

‘No idea,” she answered honestly, pushing herself up into him when he snaked his arms around her.

‘What kind of answer is that?’ He asked, pulling back to look at her. Rayne looked away, a blush coming to her cheeks.

‘I… really don’t know,” Rayne repeated. Ever observant, Negan put two and two together.

‘Don’t tell me you’re a virgin, Rayne-y girl,” he asked in a disbelieving voice. _Way to put someone on the spot,_ she thought as her blush intensified. ‘Holy fucking shit, you are, aren’t you?” When Rayne kept her gaze adverted and turning redder than a cherry, his Cheshire cat smile cut widely across his handsome face.

‘I am about fifty percent more into you now, baby girl,” Negan admitted. When Rayne finally chanced to look back up at him, she found that he’d leaned incredibly close to her. She couldn’t stop the surprised sound that escaped, nor could she stop the full-body shiver that overcame her when one of his hands grabbed a palmful of her ass. He was obviously pleased with this new bit of information, judging by the way he licked his lips provocatively. ‘Just saying,” he added. Rayne didn’t know what to say to that.

_Parker’s depending on you to make the right choice._

All thought was pushed to the wayside when his lips descended on hers, those talented lips easily coaxing hers to part as he deepened the kiss, pulling her into his hard body. Rayne whimpered helplessly, her hands coming back to fist in his jacket. It didn’t take long for him to back her right up against the wall once more, never disengaging from her mouth. Rayne mewled in response, a sound that seemed to encourage Negan.

It should have been terrifying to her that he was doing this.

It should have been wrong that he was doing this within minutes of her brother coming close to death once more.

It should have sickened her that the same hands that murdered her best friends were now being used to reduce her to a trembling mess.

And yet it felt so fucking right to just let him take what he wanted.

‘Negan,” she moaned, holding him against her when they finally parted to breathe.

‘I’m right here, baby,” he murmured against her mouth, grinding his hips into hers. She rested her head against his, feeling lightheaded from his kisses and masculine scent that was driving her absolutely crazy. Rayne bit her lip when he parted her legs more fully, situating himself between them before she could think to stop him.

‘Please,” she started, wrapping both of her arms around his neck. Negan met her heated gaze with one of his own, his cock straining at his pants. A wanton moan escaped her at the sensation, her own shorts a lost cause with how wet she’d become from this exchange.

‘What do you need, baby?” he asked in her ear, nipping at the sensitive skin below her ear lobe.

‘Fuck me,” Rayne answered, catching his meaning. She bucked up against him, an act that put her in direct contact with the hardened bulge her body ached for. Both of them hissed at the feeling, a sound that just stoked the fire in Rayne’s belly. ‘Please fuck me.”

‘I want to,” Negan replied, his voice much deeper and huskier than before. ‘More than you know, Rayne-y girl.” He pressed himself harder into her. ‘Goddammit, baby… just fucking say yes already. I can only pretend my other wives are you so much before it stops working for me. I need the real fucking thing.”

‘Then take me,” Rayne pleaded, no longer even caring how loud or how desperate she was. She needed him just as much as he needed her, wanted him, needed—

And so she was more than shocked when he withdrew from her reluctantly.

Rayne stared at him in disbelief, chest heaving with labored breath; what was he doing? Didn’t he want her? Didn’t he just say he wanted her?

She must have said that aloud.

‘As much as I want to throw your ass on your bed and fuck you till you can’t walk, I’m going to have to pass for now,” Negan said, obviously restraining himself from doing just that. Shit, she really _had_ said that. Rayne could only gawk at him as he put both of his hands on either side of her face, thumbs wiping away the tears that had suddenly fallen. Rayne enclosed his hands in her own, turning her face to kiss his palm.

‘I need you,” she whispered. ‘Please Negan. Please don’t leave me…”

Was that really her voice…?

He closed his eyes at the sound of his name, obviously fighting with himself before he placed a chaste kiss on her forehead.

‘Not tonight, baby,” Negan replied, opening his eyes as his lips brushed her heated skin and sent goosebumps all over her body. ‘I will soon… once you can tell me yes with a clear head.” He finally pulled away from her, picking up Lucille from where she rested against the wall closest to the door and opening it up, turning back to look at her. ‘I’ll swing by in the morning before my guys leave with your little brother,” he called back. ‘Take the rest of the week off and take care of yourself. I don’t want to hear that you’ve skipped dinner again.”

‘…Alright,” Rayne answered in a dejected voice, slowly coming back to her senses even though her body still ached with need. Negan smiled gently at her, resting Lucille on his shoulder.

'Sweet dreams, Rayne-y girl,” he said before walking out her door and closing it behind him, leaving Rayne alone once more. As soon as he disappeared, Rayne walked to the door and locked it behind him, resting her head against it once more. Damn him… damn that bastard for taking her to the edge and then leaving her frustrated. If this was his idea of making her feel better after what she thought was a moment between them…

'Fuck you,” she muttered in vexation, turning away from the door as she practically ripped off her shorts and panties. True to her suspicions, they were absolutely soaked completely through. Rayne inwardly cursed him again as she lay down on her bed, finishing what he’d started as she set to work rubbing her clit, two fingers dipping inside her soaking pussy. It didn’t take long for her to reach the edge, Rayne turning her head into her pillow and biting it to keep herself from drawing any unwanted attention. Her walls clenched around her fingers, her entire body arching as though bolts of electricity were shooting through her as she came, Negan’s name on her lips much to her shame and delight…

Rayne collapsed back onto her bed, breathing heavily with her release. It’d definitely been a while since she’d gotten herself off as evident by the fact that her limbs felt like jelly. As her silver eyes gazed up at the ceiling, she couldn’t help but wonder if this was Negan’s end game after all; drive her to the edge of madness so that she had no choice but to say yes to him. That or do this as revenge for “playing hard to get” with him all the time. It wouldn’t surprise her if it was option two.

Right as Rayne thought this, her eyes slid over to Parker’s empty bed. All at once, she was robbed of the pleasant afterglow and brought back to the harsh reality of the world.

‘My God,” Rayne whispered in horror, jerking her hands away from herself. ‘What have I done? What the hell have I done?” Tears fell down her cheeks suddenly, Rayne rolling to her side and facing the wall as shame overcame her. How could she? How could she think only of her own needs when Parker had come so close to death? Her cries gave way to body wracking sobs, Rayne’s small hands coming to cover her face, the unique smell of herself just making matters worse.

‘Damn you, Negan,” she whispered, shaking pugnaciously. ‘Damn you for everything…”

She cried for hours it seemed before Rayne finally fell mercifully into a deep, dreamless sleep, too exhausted mentally and physically to stay awake any longer.

* * *

‘-stable, so he should be able to get a full night’s rest now.” Carson finished, covering the little boy before him up carefully. It’d taken some time, but finally, he seemed as though he were fast asleep save for the occasional sharp breaths that he would take. Sammy nodded, watching Parker like a hawk. Once they had made it back to Carson’s office, he filled Sammy in on what had happened and- once the other Savior that had accompanied them in was gone- what Negan had finally decided as far as sending him to Hilltop.

‘So he’s for sure going,” Sammy concluded, running a hand through his hair. ‘That’s good, he’ll finally get the help he needed. Thankfully Gregory is pretty laid back when it comes to helping kids, so he shouldn’t give us any trouble once we get there.” He paused for a moment, remembering the look in Rayne’s eyes when he’d seen her for a brief moment. ‘How is Rayne? Is she ok?” Carson, who’d sat down to write up a report for Hilltop’s doctor, paused and turned in his direction.

‘Rayne?” he asked, to which Sammy nodded. ‘She was shaken up which is completely understandable. I don’t think anyone expects a child to wake them up in the middle of the night having a seizure and choking the way he was.”

‘I see,” Sammy said, leaning back against the wall closest to the exam table where Parker was resting. ‘Was Negan with her?” Carson glanced his way before going back to his report.

‘Yes, he was there,” Carson affirmed. ‘He was already in the room with her when I got called in. Call me what you will, but you don’t want to know what I think was going on with them.” Sammy turned back towards him.

‘What do you mean “what was going on”?” Carson shook his head.

‘It was probably nothing,” Carson muttered. ‘Neither of them looked like they were in the middle of something, it just strikes me as odd that he would be in her room this time of night. I can only think of a couple of reasons as to why he’d be in there.”

‘I wish he’d just leave her alone,” Sammy growled under his breath. ‘She has enough to worry about.” Carson paused and cast him a sympathetic look.

‘If you don’t mind my saying, you and Rayne appear to be pretty close to one another. May I ask how you know her?”

‘It’s a bit of a long story,” Sammy replied. ‘We grew up on the same street before the world went to shit, went to the same school, hell even went to the same college where we were roommates.” He smiled fondly. ‘I and Rayne along with our other friends shared a three-bedroom apartment off-campus, all of us getting into crazy shit be it running on the rooftops and streets, making stupid videos, going on midnight adventures to the beach just to watch the sunrise the next morning… it was a good life.” Carson listened quietly, not once interrupting him.

‘Sounds like you were close to one another. Were you ever more than friends?” Sammy was quiet for a long moment, seemingly lost in his memories.

‘To some, we were. Not sure if you could technically say that we were ever a thing, but we were definitely as close as two people can possibly be.” Sammy finally clarified. ‘Especially after her mom died. I was probably the only person that she ever completely opened up to after it happened. Then when the dead started walking around, we and the rest of our friends stayed together to get back here from Chicago, hoping that we could find a new beginning or even meet up with a good crew to make our own outpost. Instead, she and the others went to her father’s community, and I came here. We never really had a chance to get back to trying to be something beyond just friends.”

‘I see,” Carson said. ‘I can understand how it must bother you seeing her with Negan, especially if you were as close as you were.” Sammy finally met the doctor’s eyes.

‘That obvious, huh?”

‘You make it obvious,” Carson elucidated. ‘You’re never far away from her, you get defensive when other Saviors remark about it, and you’ve been sulking ever since we got Parker in here. Classic symptoms of unrequited love for someone you don’t feel worthy of.” Sammy was quiet for a moment.

‘Gotta admit, you got me there, Doc.” Sammy said with a sheepish smile, an act that Carson would argue made him look younger than he may have been. ‘Even after all this… I guess you can say that I still do have a thing for her.” He stopped again, a thought coming to mind. ‘Can I ask you a serious question, Carson? Without anyone finding out from you?”

‘Of course,” the doctor replied. ‘What’s said in here never leaves here. Patient doctor confidentiality, remember?” Sammy nodded.

‘Do you… think it’d be crazy if I said… that I really do love Rayne?” Those words felt strange coming from him, but at the same time, they didn’t. He wasn’t really sure if what he felt truly was love but… well, there wasn’t really any other words that could better describe it. She was the only other person he could say that about, anyway. Carson sighed and stood from his chair, coming around to where Sammy stood.

‘Do you want my opinion as a doctor, or as one human being to another?” Sammy shrugged his shoulders.

‘Both is fine by me.” Carson gave him a serious look.

‘From one human being to another, I think you’re playing with fire, Sam.” Carson said in a bleak tone. ‘You and I both know what happens when others get in the way of Negan, especially when his sights are set on a particular woman. I don’t need to remind you of what happened to the other two men that ran off with their wives, the boyfriends of Michela and Josephine, or even Dwight. You’re a good man, one of the last few in the world likely. What you choose to do is your decision alone, just remember that whatever it may be, you will have to deal with the consequences. And they may not be the ones in which you get to walk away unscathed.”

'And as a doctor?”

‘As a doctor, I can’t really do anything for you in regards to feelings of the heart,” he began. ‘The only real cure for something like that is to tell Rayne yourself so that- should a day come that you can’t- you will never have regrets. Otherwise, I prescribe one strong drink of liquid courage to bring you out of your shell with her, in moderation of course.” Sammy laughed a little at this.

‘Thanks, Doc. I appreciate it.”

‘It’s what I’m here for Sammy. You’ll only get my honest opinion here,” Carson added, patting him on the shoulder. ‘Now—” Before any other words could pass from Carson, a whistle cut through the room, making both men freeze before each other. Slowly- as though their heads were stones grinding against stones- they turned their eyes towards Negan, who was leaning in the doorway swinging Lucille back and forth as they talked.

‘Gentlemen,” Negan began, pushing off the frame and walking towards the two men who’d finally moved to drop to a knee. ‘None of that shit. Get on ya feet,” he barked. Sammy and Carson obeyed without a word. ‘I wasn’t interrupting your mighty deep conversation now, was I?” He asked, a smile coming to his lips. Carson shook his head.

‘No sir,” the doctor replied. ‘Just giving some medical advice to Sammy.” Negan’s hazel eyes slid over to Sammy, a sharp look lingering within them.

‘Medical advice?” he asked. ‘You ain’t about to keel over on me are ya now, Sammy?”

‘No sir,” the younger man replied. ‘Not at all.”

‘Huh,” Negan answered, staring at him critically. ‘Give us a minute doc. I need to have a talk with our good friend here.” Carson left the room without a word, closing the door behind him without needing to be told. A tense silence befell the men within, Parker completely oblivious to the staredown as he slept behind Sammy.

‘Now then,” Negan began. ‘Seeing as you are just the man I’ve been looking for, I want to ask you about something, Sam.” Sammy said nothing as Negan continued to meet his gaze. ‘A little birdy told me not too long ago that you and Rayne-y girl are pretty close.” _Damn you, Simon_ , Sammy cursed inwardly.

‘She’s just a friend of mine,” he replied, keeping his voice even. ‘That’s all.” Negan laughed at this, bringing Lucille up to drape on his shoulder.

‘Ok,” Negan said with a smile. ‘Sounds legit. As much as I like a good story about hot girls, especially ones with Rayne-y girl, that’s not what I want to hear from you.” He shifted his weight a bit, readjusting Lucille on his shoulder. ‘I heard that Rayne likes to paint. I’m not an artist myself, in fact I know absolute fuck all when it comes to paint. Since the two of you are such good friends, why don’t you tell me about what kind of paint my Rayne-y girl likes to paint with.”

You could have knocked Sammy over with a feather after Negan said this, a look of confusion on his face before he snapped out of it. _What is he planning?_

‘She likes watercolors,” Sammy admitted, seeing no harm in telling him that. ‘She used to work with it all the time when we were in school. I don’t know of anyone who can outshine her when it comes to it.”

‘Great,” Negan exclaimed, a wide smile cutting across his face. ‘And here I was thinking that I was gonna have to find some kind of rare fuckery that’s made from flowers or some shit like that. There used to be an old craft store in the next town over.” Negan paused, clearly thinking of something before he looked back at Sammy. ‘Get a couple of men together and meet me out by the bikes after breakfast. We’re going to go on a ride.”

‘Yes sir,” Sammy replied, hiding his suspicion as he moved to turn back towards Parker.

‘One more thing, Sammy,” Negan continued, Sammy freezing and glancing back at him. His blood ran cold when he noticed that Negan’s face had turned deadly serious. ‘Have you been trying to swoop in on her while she’s been going through the ringer?” Sammy quickly shook his head.

‘No sir, not at all. You were crystal clear when you told all of us to keep our distance.”

‘Good deal,” Negan answered. He ran a hand through his beard as though deep in thought. ‘A damn shame she’s so stressed out about all this. Hell, anyone else would have cracked under all the pressure but Rayne-y girl? She’s taking all of it like a champ. I like that about her, almost as much as I like just how fucking hot she is. I mean, let’s be honest here; Rayne’s pretty much a fucking orphan, running around not knowing what to do anymore now that her daddy is out of her life.” Sammy’s stare had unknowingly hardened at this, something that didn’t go unnoticed by Negan.

‘Careful,” the older man warned, returning his glare with one of his own. ‘Careful how you’re looking at me, Sam.” Sammy held his gaze for a second longer before averting his eyes. Pleased with his submission, Negan continued. ‘Orphans, especially ones that look like her? They’re special. I love ‘em. When they’re all alone in a new place they’re just… empty inside. But usually not for long!” Negan chuckled jovially at this, thoroughly enjoying the reaction he was getting from Sammy, whose blood was boiling in anger. It was taking everything in him not to knock that shit-eating grin off his face.

‘But you wanna know what the best part of all this is? After little man back there goes to see those damn farmers, I get to be the hero Rayne-y girl needs!” Sammy’s fist clenched tightly, doing everything in his power to keep from swinging. ‘You should have seen her face when Carson took her kid brother out of the room.” Negan sucked in a breath, letting his lips purse. ‘She just had those eyes that said ‘Fuck me, Daddy. Fuck me and make me forget.’ She ever look at you that way?”

‘No sir,” Sammy replied. Negan stared at him for a moment, that cruel light in his eyes never leaving. It was all a game, Sammy realized and understood this. It was becoming increasingly clear that Negan knew that Sammy and Rayne were close and was using it as an opportunity to rub salt in the wound, obviously trying to goad Sammy into a fight with him over Rayne.

It wouldn’t surprise him if he was doing it simply because he wanted an excuse to kill him, to get rid of any potential competition.

‘Rayne’s only ever been my friend,” Sammy pointed out. ‘I don’t look at her like she’s just another quick fuck-”

‘Then how _do_ you look at her Sammy?” Negan said, venom coming to his voice. ‘What is it about Rayne-y girl that makes you think you _actually_ have a chance with her?” Sammy didn’t answer for a minute. ‘Do you actually think I don’t know what goes on here, that I haven’t seen you lingering in the back like some kind of creepy as shit fucking stalker? Hell, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think that you were actually thinking of trying something. Even if you’re fucking stupid- which you very well may be- you don’t have the fucking balls to try something with me, especially something as fucking stupid as trying to run off with _my_ Rayne-y girl.” Sammy said nothing, he just met his stare head-on. Negan took notice right away.

‘What?” he asked, the hand holding Lucille tightening. ‘Got something to say?” _Screw it,_ Sammy thought as he allowed himself to throw caution to the wind for a moment.

‘Why do you have her here?” He asked. ‘Why take her and Parker from Corvus’ community if all you’ve done is put her to work?”

‘Parker, soon as he gets back on his feet, is gonna be a damn good soldier for me one day when he’s old enough. He’s got spirit, just like his big sister, and you bet your fucking ass I’m gonna use that to my advantage. And as for Rayne-y girl,” Negan paused, rubbing his beard again as a sick smile came to his face, his lower lip catching in his mouth for a minute. ‘Well, we shall see.” Sammy’s blood ran cold. ‘Besides, even if things don’t work out- and I’m damn sure that they will- at least I got an insurance policy against that German asshole if he decides to try something stupid.” Sammy’s stomach dropped at this, not needing to ask what he meant.

What better way to make sure that a community wouldn’t dare to rise up against Negan than to take someone of value from the leaders?

‘If you’re so worried about Rayne, Sam, then why don’t you go find her? Ask her who she prefers; the guy that put her on the ground with a gun to the back of her head, or the handsome motherfucker that’s saving her little brother. See what she says.” Sammy stood there, unsure if he really meant for him to do just that. ‘Go ahead,” Negan dared him, staring daggers into him. ‘Go. Find. Rayne.” Without really realizing it, Sammy stormed off towards the door, hellbent on finding out what she really felt—

Only to be stopped by Lucille damn near taking his head off.

He ducked out of the way quickly, backing off from Negan who looked more than pleased with the fact that he’d intimidated Sammy enough to back down completely.

‘Oh hell,” Negan began. ‘Did you… _really_ think I was gonna make it that easy?” He laughed low in his throat. ‘I mean, I was but Lucille… well, you know how she is. She gets pretty damn protective of people she likes, and shit, she sure loves _our_ Rayne-y girl.” Negan walked closer to Sammy once the younger man had straightened back up. ‘Luckily for you, she’s not feeling too thirsty.” Negan stopped mere inches from Sammy, who met his gaze as fearlessly as he could manage. ‘I’m only gonna tell you this one fucking time, _boy_ ; you try anything with Rayne-y girl- you even fucking lay a damn finger on her or do anything that makes her uncomfortable- and I will beat the holy fuck fucking fuckity fuck out of you before you can do a damn thing. Do you understand me?” Negan held his stare for a moment longer, his face contorted into one of pure fury. His body language dared Sammy to try something with him, dared him to take a swing or put a bullet in his skull. But Sammy found that he couldn’t move a muscle, no matter how much he wanted to.

Finally, he glanced down at his feet.

‘Yes sir,” Sammy said. Pleased with his response, Negan backed up and away from Sammy, his usual smile back on his face as though nothing had happened.

‘Cool,” he said, patting Sammy on the shoulder. ‘Glad we had this talk.” Negan headed for the door, looking very much like the cat that caught the canary. ‘Get Hilltop on the radio and let them know we’ll be showing up early with the little man behind you. And make sure they got our offering ready.”

‘Yes sir,” Sammy replied, reaching for the radio on his hip.

‘And Sammy?” Negan called one more time, right as he was by the door. Sammy looked back at him. ‘Do a good enough job for me and I’ll tell you all about what it’s like to fuck Rayne.” He laughed at this, finally exiting the room. Sammy’s fists clenched tightly, his nails digging into his palms.

_Touch her and I’ll fucking kill you,_ he wanted to say, shaking in rage. After a moment, he sighed heavily, turning towards the wall and resting his head against it. Who was he kidding; against Negan, he had no chance in hell. Sammy damn near met his fate with Lucille once, so how was the next time supposed to work out in his favor?

‘It’s my fault,” he muttered quietly. ‘She’s here because of me… it’s my fault.” Sammy tried to control his breathing as he turned around, sinking down onto one of the nearby chairs as he buried his head in his hands. Without really realizing it, angry tears had begun to flow down his cheeks, something which reminded him once more of how he came to be in this position.

He was weak. He was weak and powerless against someone like Negan who clearly had it out for him just because of his connection with Rayne. The others had been right; it really was just a matter of time now before he lost Rayne forever.

‘I’m sorry,” he whispered, squeezing his eyes shut. ‘I’m sorry, Rayne… I’m so sorry.” And then he collapsed inwards, sobbing vehemently.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really, REALLY fought with myself about ending the chapter the way it did. On one hand I felt like it wasn't a good fit seeing as Parker was just taken to Carson's office, but at the same time, I felt like it was something Rayne would do in the heat of the moment just to get some relief for herself even if it's not really an appropriate time for such. When the world is an apocalypse and you have the world on your shoulders, it would make sense that she'd want a small escape even if it only added to the pain she already feels. In a nutshell, I'm happy my beta reader talked me into keeping it! =D
> 
> I hope you enjoyed, my dear readers! Please continue to leave your kudos and comments as well as being awesome! ^_^/


	7. Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rayne dreams of her mother and braces herself for letting Parker go.
> 
> 12/3/19- I know it's been awhile since I've updated the story, but I'm adding some things here and there that I thought were needed to give the story a bit more depth, included more interaction between Sammy and Rayne. I promise very soon I'll have the new chapter up. Life has just been crazy!

_Rayne…_

_Rayne, wake up…_

_Rayne…_

She stirred from an already restless sleep, her silver eyes opening slowly. Strange, she could have sworn she heard someone calling her name. Oh well. Rayne started to roll back over onto her side when she heard it again.

_Rayne come here my sweet girl._

She froze in the act of moving, sitting very still for a moment. She _knew_ that voice! Rayne sat up slowly, looking around the room carefully only to notice something different. Her breath caught in her throat as she glanced around, silver eyes wide as saucers.

Rayne was still lying in bed, but she wasn’t in the hard-twin bed that she’d been given at the Sanctuary; no, this was much more comfortable, and the blankets were covered in cherry blossoms and cute little rabbit characters. The walls around her were filled with watercolor pictures of different things; flowers, fish, buildings, and people to name a few, and there were even some old photos hanging up of Rayne with different people around her age. Most iconic of all was an old paint-stained desk sitting directly in front of her with art supplies that had been meticulously organized, the brushes still pristine as though they were brand new and a fresh sheet of paper already sitting out for her…

‘Home,” she muttered, hardly daring to believe what she was seeing. ‘I’m home…”

_Rayne,_ came the voice again, sounding like it was just outside her door. Rayne moved the blankets to the side and swung her legs over the side of the bed, her bare feet touching the wooden floor beneath her. Slowly, she wandered to the door of her old room, taking time to glance around at her old artwork one more time as she passed them all. _Am I really here,_ she wondered, reaching the oak door that separated her from the voice. Carefully, Rayne took the knob in her hand and slowly turned it to open the door, nearly blinded by the bright light on the other side. Rayne brought her hands up to shield her eyes, waiting for it to subside before she lowered them, a familiar smell wafting up into her nose.

Was that… jasmine tea?

‘There you are!” A kind feminine voice called out to her, catching Rayne off guard. ‘You got here just in time!” Rayne looked in the direction of the voice, freezing in her tracks as she observed the owner of the voice:

It was an older Japanese woman in her late thirties dressed in a dark blue dress with hair black as a raven’s wing hanging down her back. A sakura hairpin held half of her dark locks out of her olive-skinned face, her kind brown eyes dancing as they gazed at Rayne. Her features were angular, yet very softly so, her expression one of pure adoration. Rayne’s breath grew ragged as she continued to stand there, hardly daring to believe who she was staring at.

‘Mom?” she whispered, a hand coming up to her mouth. Isabella smiled gently at her daughter, clasping her hands together as they rested in front of her.

‘Hello, my Rayne,” she replied. ‘I was wondering when you would come back. You’re always working nowadays.” Rayne’s body shook, tears falling down her cheeks. Isabella noticed this right away, her face falling to one of concern. ‘Rayne? Is everything alright?”

‘Mom…” Rayne choked out, wandering a little closer to her, one hand reaching out for Isabella only to hesitate before touching her arm. Isabella nodded.

‘It’s me, my Rayne.” Her mother assured her. Rayne exhaled sharply before falling against her mother, clutching tightly to her as Isabella’s arms encircled her.

‘Mom…” she cried, burying her face in her chest. ‘Mom…”

‘It’s alright,” Isabella soothed. ‘ _Kaasan_ is here.”

‘I’ve missed you,” Rayne said, refusing to let her go. ‘I’ve missed you so much.” Isabella pulled back slowly, resting both hands on her daughter’s face. ‘I’ve—”

‘I know, Rayne,” Isabella stopped her, wiping away her tears with her thumbs. ‘I’ve missed you too. More than you can imagine.” Rayne glanced down for a moment, almost ashamed to look at her. ‘Come,” Isabella finished, leading Rayne towards the nearby table which held two steaming cups of tea, small cookies, and other sweets that Rayne recognized as desserts her mother used to make for them. ‘Sit with me for a while. Tell me what is wrong.”

‘Wrong?” Rayne echoed, taking a seat at the table with her mother sitting diagonally from her. Isabella nodded, pulling a plate of cookies closer to the two of them.

‘You’re only up early when something is bothering you,” Isabella noted, waiting for Rayne to take a sip of her tea before she did. ‘I’m surprised you haven’t come to me sooner considering. I thought that if you knew I’d seen Parker that you would want to come to me as well.” Rayne paused, sitting there thoughtfully before she took another drink.

‘I don’t know where to begin,” Rayne started. ‘Things have been so hectic… so much has changed that it’s hard to find a good place to start.”

‘Then tell me what is bothering you now,” Isabella implored. Rayne glanced at her, silver meeting brown as Isabella rubbed her daughter’s hand. ‘You know there is nothing that you can say or do that would make me angry with you. I’m here to help you, not judge you.”

‘Parker’s sick, Mom,” Rayne began. ‘He’s really sick… and the people I’m with are sending him somewhere else so that he can get the help that he needs.”

‘This is a good thing, yes?” Isabella observed. ‘He deserves a chance to have a healthy life.”

‘I know but… Mom, I don’t know these people.” Rayne continued. ‘I don’t know if I can completely trust them or anyone else around me. Normally I have a good sense of who is good and who isn’t, but this time I’m not sure. I don’t like being unsure like this.” Isabella nodded as Rayne continued to tell her more of Carson’s plan to send him to Hilltop, then her argument with Sammy and her feelings about his betrayal, until finally…

‘There’s a man here,” Rayne commenced, taking a shaky breath. ‘His name is Negan. He seems like he has good intentions. I mean, he’s the reason Parker was able to get all the medical attention he needs and the reason he’s going to Hilltop in the first place, but…”

‘But you feel wrong in placing trust in him,” Isabella noted. Rayne looked into her mother’s eyes. ‘You feel as though you can’t trust him for what he’s done even though there is proof before you that he may not be all that he seems.” Rayne nodded. Isabella gave her a knowing smile as she reached to hold both of her daughter’s hands. ‘My Rayne, you know I would never dare tell you the wrong thing to do, nor can I tell you what is wrong and right. But I know that you already know what the right thing to do is. Everything you have ever done has been for Parker.”

‘I don’t know if it’s enough,” Rayne admitted. ‘I feel lost without you here… it seemed like no matter what I asked you, you always knew what to say or do. I’m not as like you as Dad says that I am.” Isabella sighed, looking down at her tea before looking back at Rayne.

‘Your father has a lot to deal with, Rayne,” she began. ‘He means well, but Corvus is too proud to ever admit when he’s wrong or when he needs help. You are the same in the regard that you want to do everything yourself instead of letting others in.” Rayne glanced up at her, stray tears falling down her cheeks. ‘My dear sweet girl, you can’t do everything on your own. I know things are not as they once were, but you must learn to let others in. You mustn’t be too proud to admit when you are overwhelmed, for it will be your downfall if you let it overcome you.”

‘How though?” Rayne questioned. ‘How do I know when I’m letting the right people in?” Isabella smiled gently at her once more.

‘That is something that you must learn for yourself, my Rayne,” she advised. ‘It may take practice, but you are my smart girl. You will know, just as you will always know what the right choice is to make.” Rayne sat solemnly before her, looking down at their hands as they clasped together. After a moment, her silver eyes looked back up into the warm orbs of her mother’s.

‘ _Kaasan,_ ” she said before coming out of her chair to embrace her mother, holding her tightly against her. Isabella welcomed her first born into her arms, carding her fingers through her burgundy locks soothingly as they clutched one another. ‘I wish you were still here,” Rayne cried. ‘I wish you were still here with us.” Isabella beamed down at Rayne, tears filling her own eyes.

‘I do too, my Rayne. But know that I am proud of you- fiercely proud- and I am always with you. Just look at your brother and the stars, and you will always find me.” Rayne smiled at Isabella, snuggling into the warmth of her mother once more. ‘I love you, my Rayne.”

‘I love you too, _Kaasan_ ,” Rayne replied as her eyes slid closed. ‘Thank you… for everything.” When Isabella said nothing, Rayne opened her eyes to look up at her. But instead of the lovely countenance of the elder Verloren woman, Rayne was greeted with the cold wall before her, the smells and warmth of her home fading away with her dream. She sighed heavily, rolling over onto her back. That was new… she hadn’t dreamed of her mother in a long time now. _When you see someone in your dreams and they aren’t there, that means they’ve come to visit you,_ her own advice rung in her ears as she blinked slowly. Despite her depression, a smile came to Rayne’s face.

‘Thanks Mom,” Rayne said quietly, glancing towards the window to see that it was still somewhat dark outside. Judging by the sounds of something hitting the glass, it was raining outside. How fitting that the weather was mimicking her mood. ‘Wonder what time it is,” she thought aloud, stretching her arms over her head before sitting up slowly. More than likely it was still very early in the morning, though seeing as she’d been conditioned to be awake at a certain time every day, likely it was already time to get up.

Sighing heavily, Rayne sat up and pushed the blankets off her. _Time to start the same routine as always._ She paused at this thought as she swung her legs over the side of the bed and gingerly put her feet on the exposed concrete of the floor. The shock of the cold floor was enough to jolt her awake far better than any cup of coffee or hot shower could have. She yawned and forced herself up and over to the sink to do her daily ritual of washing her face.

Once that was done, she put on a pair of fresh shorts and grabbed the slightly broken caddy that held her and Parker’s toiletries along with throwing some new clothes into the caddy before heading for the showers. Last night had her feeling especially grimy, and she didn’t feel like using the sink to do all her usual hygiene. Besides, Negan had told her he’d be by early in the morning before they took Parker to Hilltop, and she wanted to be washed and ready by the time he got there.

Thirty minutes later, she was back in her room dressed in a gray t-shirt, dark jeans and her boots, brushing out her long burgundy hair carefully. Just as she suspected, the hot shower made her feel a little better than before, but still Rayne felt anxious, knowing what was going to happen. _I’m not going to cry,_ Rayne vowed as she tossed her hair over her shoulder, moving to pick up her red jacket. _I must be strong for Parker. I can’t let him see me cry and risk him getting scared._

Once she was completely dressed in her jacket, Rayne stood in the center of the room, chewing her lip and wringing her hands anxiously. It was hard to tell what time it was since there wasn’t a clock in the room, but she couldn’t stand just sitting here doing nothing. She had to do something, anything to get her mind off today. _Is Parker still in Carson’s office,_ Rayne wondered to herself, pacing back and forth. Surely, he had to. Surely, they wouldn’t just leave without telling her… would they?

‘Fucking hell,” Rayne cursed, heading for the door. She couldn’t take it anymore; she had to find Parker or Sammy or someone. As she moved to grab the door handle, Rayne was cut off by a sharp knock at her door. Rayne waited a moment, not wanting the person on the other side to think she’d been about to open the door before doing just that, opening it a crack to look out. Realizing who it was, she opened it the rest of the way.

‘Good morning, sweetheart,” Negan said with a smile, holding a plate covered with a silver lid in his hand as well as a small carton of orange juice under his arm and Lucille in his other.

‘Morning,” Rayne replied, wordlessly granting him permission to enter her room by stepping to the side and letting him walk in towards the table, setting down the plate and orange juice before walking back to her looking down at her with a most curious look in his eyes.

‘You sleep good, baby?” he asked, pressing a kiss to Rayne’s forehead.

‘I guess,” she admitted with a shrug of her shoulders, following him to the table at his urging. Rayne sat down first, Negan pushing her towards the table before sliding the plate her way as well as the orange juice before making a show of lifting the lid. Rayne looked down, her mouth opening slightly in surprise; looking back up at her were two fluffy pancakes with blueberries forming a smiley face as well as some bacon and strawberries. Her stomach growled at the sight of this, a bit too loud for her liking.

‘Figured you might be hungry,” Negan observed, pulling a knife and fork from one of his pockets to place down on either side of her, grabbing the other chair and pulling it around so that he was sitting beside her. Rayne glanced to him before picking up the silverware and cutting the pancakes, stabbing them with her fork and chewing on them critically. To her surprise, they were delicious. It’d been forever since she’d had a good breakfast like this. ‘How are they?”

‘Pretty good,” Rayne said, continuing to eat. ‘I haven’t had pancakes since before Mom… well, since before all this.” Negan just observed her with a smile on his face, enjoying the sight of her eating obviously. Rayne couldn’t exactly blame him; this _was_ the first cooked meal she enjoyed since coming to the Sanctuary, having lived off granola bars and water.

‘Your mother always make these for you?” He asked. Rayne nodded, taking a bite of bacon.

‘Yeah, she always liked to get up early and cook breakfast before I went to school,” Rayne replied. ‘Sometimes she’d switch up from pancakes to Japanese food, sometimes even waffles since Dad liked them more. Even when she was sick, she still kept doing it until she wasn’t able to anymore.” Negan said nothing, only listened intently to her. One of his hands was resting on her leg, occasionally rubbing it but going no further than mid-thigh. Rayne saw no reason to tell him to move it for that reason.

The fact that it felt right for him to rest it there had nothing to do with it, or at least that’s what she told herself.

‘Have you gone by Carson’s office?” She asked him, turning the topic away from her mother. Negan shook his head, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. ‘I was thinking of heading that way before you came in. I just… wanted to see how Parker was doing.”

‘Soon as you get done, we’ll walk down there.” Negan assured her, his hand dropping back down to her leg. ‘Food’s just as important as he is. You’re not gonna keep fucking neglecting yourself, regardless if he’s sick or not.” Rayne glanced at him as she took a sip of her juice.

‘To me he is,” Rayne admitted. ‘As long as he has what he needs—”

‘He _has_ everything he needs,” Negan said bluntly. ‘You can stop worrying so damn much. It won’t fucking kill you to take care of what you need every once in a while.” _But he needs it more_ , her mind voiced, her tongue dying to let that out. But she knew better than to say it aloud, especially seeing as he could easily take everything away from them as quickly as he’d given it. Rayne turned her attention back to the rest of the pancakes, finishing them up as well as the orange juice. Her body hummed in satisfaction, every fiber of her happy to have a decent meal for the first time in a long time.

‘Better?” Negan asked, taking in the sight of Rayne’s smile, albeit small.

‘Better,” she agreed. Rayne paused for a moment. ‘Thank you. You really didn’t have to—”

‘I wanted to,” Negan cut her off, his free hand coming to ghost along her cheek. ‘I told you I’d take care of you, didn’t I?” Rayne leaned into his touch unconsciously, enjoying the warmth from his hand in comparison to the damp coolness of the room.

‘You did,” she answered, opening her silver eyes and meeting his hazel ones. Negan’s lips curled up into a bigger smile, leaning forward to kiss her forehead again. They lingered on her skin for a minute, brushing down her nose and across her eyes before covering her full lips, moving slowly and sensually against them. Just as last night, Rayne didn’t fight his kiss, only gave in seeing as he was going to take it from her regardless of if she moved away or not. The kiss lasted for but a minute before Negan drew back.

‘Come on, Rayne-y girl,” Negan said, standing up and pulling Rayne up to her feet. ‘Let’s go see your brother. It’s almost time for him to go.” Rayne nodded and followed him to the door where he grabbed Lucille in one hand and opened the door with the other, letting her go out before him. Rayne waited a few steps away for Negan to close the door and bring Lucille up to rest on his shoulder in her usual spot, his other hand taking hold of one of hers and interlocking their fingers together. Rayne glanced down in surprise as he squeezed it gently, leading her down the hallway, but otherwise didn’t pull away from him.

_Why is he being like this?_ She wondered to herself, falling in step with Negan as they carried on, passing by some other Saviors and workers who fell to a knee as Negan and Rayne strolled by only to rise again once he passed. _Is it because of last night?_ She wouldn’t be surprised if that was the case. Perhaps he was trying to be comforting to her, perhaps not. The thought that he was once again trying to tempt her into accepting his proposal never once crossed her mind, though she did wonder briefly if his conversation with her last night was playing a part in this.

Finally, they reached Carson’s office, Negan releasing her hand to open the door for Rayne to enter before he followed her in. Her silver eyes glanced around the office, noticing that Carson was already at Parker’s side by the exam table. Her heart ached when she noticed that Parker was still lying motionless, although he looked like he was slightly awake.

‘Morning Doc,” Negan said, resting a hand on the small of Rayne’s back as he guided her closer to Parker. Carson glanced up from where he was taking Parker’s blood pressure and nodded, but otherwise said nothing for a moment. Satisfied, he removed his stethoscope from his ears and replaced it around his neck. ‘How’s the little guy?”

‘He’s still in and out of consciousness, but all his vitals are stable. I believe he’s well enough to travel, but whether Parker will wake up fully, I’m not sure. Last night took a toll on him physically.” Rayne listened to Carson for a moment before she walked towards the exam table, taking her little brother’s hand in her own. ‘I’ll give you a moment with him.” Carson added, walking towards the door. Negan started to follow him, pausing for a moment to look back at Rayne.

‘Take as much time as you need, Rayne-y girl,” he said. ‘I’ll come back when it’s time.” Rayne nodded as he left before turning her attention back to Parker.

‘Hey little dude, I’m back,” she said, smoothing his hair from his face. Parker’s eyes opened slightly, his breathing deep as though he’d been sleeping.

‘Sis… sy?” he said weakly. Rayne smiled and nodded.

‘It’s me,” she affirmed. ‘Did you sleep good last night?” Parker closed his eyes for a minute then reopened them, clearly struggling to keep them open.

‘I’m still sleepy, Rayne,” he admitted. Rayne leaned forward and kissed his forehead.

‘You can go back to sleep if you want to,” Rayne replied. ‘It’s still early in the morning.” Parker tried to sit up, one arm feebly reaching for his sister to pick him up. Rayne acquiesced without question, gathering him up into her arms as he rested his head against her chest.

‘But I have to go to school. I have to get up now, Sissy,” Parker argued. Rayne ignored the twinge of pain in her heart. _Does he even know he’s sick anymore,_ she wondered?

‘It’s ok,” she admitted. ‘There’s no school today. You can sleep in all you want.” Rayne rocked Parker gently, remembering how that used to put him to sleep so easily.

‘What about you?” Parker questioned. ‘You have to go… I’ll be on my own…”

‘I’m not going anywhere,” Rayne said quickly, brushing his hair back when it fell back into his face. ‘You won’t be alone, I promise.” _Yes, he will,_ a cruel voice in her head reminded her. _Don’t make that promise when you know he’ll be gone soon._

‘You’ll feel better when you wake up,” Rayne continued. ‘Then we’ll go outside so you can see the trucks and the cars that you like, maybe even to the flowers and the vegetables. We’ll spend the entire day together, just you and me.” Rayne kept her voice soft and soothing, doing her best to hide the sadness in her voice. _Can I really do this,_ she questioned herself. _Can I really let him go to Hilltop without me?_

‘Will Mommy be there? Will she be in the flowers like before?” Rayne froze at his words. ‘I saw her in the flowers again, Sissy. She said she loves me and said I could find her in the flowers.” Rayne was lost for words, unsure what to say. Without really realizing it, she’d started staring off into space, her vision hazy with tears before clearing once more.

‘I… yes, Parker,” she responded when Parker started to doze off. ‘If that’s where she said she’ll be, then we’ll see Mom in the flowers.” Rayne sighed a little heavier than she meant to, cradling her brother closer to her. She ignored the wetness that was falling down her cheeks, focused only on keeping Parker close to her for as long as she could. For reasons she couldn’t explain, Rayne couldn’t help but feel that this would the last time she held him like this. Who knew when they’d have a quiet moment to themselves when he was taken to Hilltop?

‘Sissy?” Parker piped up, his silver eyes opening as best as they could to look at her. ‘Sissy, what’s wrong?” Rayne glanced back down to him and shook her head, forcing a smile on her face.

‘Nothing,” Rayne assured him. ‘Sissy’s fine, don’t worry about me.” Parker acted as though he’d say something, but only a sharp exhale escaped him as he snuggled further into her. ‘I love you, you know that?” Rayne continued. ‘I love you Parker, with all my heart and never forget that no matter what. There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do for you if it meant that you would have everything that you needed. I’d give up everything, just for you.”

‘I love you too, Sissy,” Parker murmured against her, shifting so that he was laying up against her chest. Rayne nuzzled her head against him, holding tightly to her little brother as she began humming their mother’s lullaby to him, stroking his hair lovingly until Parker’s breathing evened out. Once she was sure that he was asleep, Rayne stopped, becoming aware that they were no longer alone. She glanced up, noticing for the first time the figure that was looking in on them, acting as though they’d bolt any second.

‘Sammy,” she said, locking eyes with him. Sammy hesitated, then came into the room, coming closer until he was about five feet away. He looked as though he’d not slept at all, especially seeing that he was wearing what she last saw him in; green cargo pants that had been patched up with brown cloth, a dark brown shirt and his usual black boots. His hair was hanging slightly in his face, but at least he’d finally gotten around to shaving. She couldn’t help but noticed that he looked like… well, Sammy. The old Sammy that used to be the first one up in their old place to make coffee and muffins for everyone. The old Sammy…

‘Hey,” Sammy replied quietly, holding the strap to his rifle in place on his shoulder. ‘You doing alright?”

‘Yeah,” Rayne answered, shifting Parker carefully in her arms. ‘What about you?”

‘I’ve been better,” he said. ‘Otherwise, I guess I can’t complain.” An awkward silence befell them. ‘How’s Parker?” Rayne spared a glance down to her brother, who’d began sucking on his thumb as he listened to Rayne’s heartbeat.

‘Out like a light,” she noted, cradling Parker’s head in her hand. ‘He’s not slept like this since he was a year old.”

‘I remember that,” Sammy said with a smile. ‘He’d fall asleep faster than any kid I ever saw when he was with you. I mean, he’d sleep for your mom and dad, but it just took you holding him like this, and he’d be out like a light.” Rayne smiled at this too.

‘Yeah he would. Mom was always jealous that I could get him to go to sleep faster than she could sometimes.” Her smiled began to fade. ‘Are they almost ready to take him?” Sammy nodded.

‘They’re getting the trucks ready now. Parker will be with a couple of guys I work with a lot, so he’ll be in good hands with them. Carson’s briefing them on how to deal with a seizure if he has one.” Sammy informed her. ‘I trust them with my life, so you don’t have to worry about a thing.”

‘I hope he doesn’t have another,” Rayne uttered. ‘I don’t know if I could handle that thought.” She glanced up at him. ‘Aren’t you going with them?” Sammy shook his head.

‘I wanted to, believe me, but Negan wants me on something else. We’re heading out to the next town over on a supply run soon as Parker rolls out.”

‘Oh,” Rayne said wistfully. ‘When will you be back?”

‘You know how supply runs can be, Rayne,” he pointed out. ‘They can be long or short depending on what goes on. The next town is just about an hour away, so maybe two or three hours counting the trip to and back.”

‘I see,” said Rayne. She glanced down at Parker as her chest tightened. ‘Sammy, about the last time we talked. I said some things—”

‘No,” Sammy interrupted her, holding up a hand and shaking his head. ‘You were right to say everything you did to me. You were upset and I wasn’t helping things by saying what I did. You don’t have to apologize, not to me, not for that.”

‘But I do,” Rayne confessed. ‘You’ve done nothing but try to help me and Parker and I’ve been absolutely terrible to you…”

‘I’ve done terrible things,” Sammy added. Rayne looked up at him as his voice trailed off. ‘I’m the one that should be sorry for everything. If I’d been honest with you from the start then Trevor, Coby, Dallas, Han Woo, Celeste… maybe they’d still be here with us. I deserve every bit of shit you give me. I still do.” Rayne regarded him carefully, holding her brother close.

‘Guess we have to agree to disagree then,” She noted.

‘Guess so,” Sammy replied, a smile teasing at his lips. ‘So… Truce?” Rayne paused for a minute before a smile came to her lips too.

‘Truce,” she replied. Her silver eyes looked off suddenly, noticing that the rain had stopped. ‘Where do you think they are?”

‘Hmm?” Sammy answered in confusion.

‘Trevor and the rest of the crew… where do you think they ended up?” Rayne asked again.

‘Oh… you mean like Heaven or something?” Rayne nodded. ‘Ah. Well, knowing Coby and Dallas, as long as they ended up with some “hot, big booty bitches” and booze, then they’re in heaven. Celeste is there for sure along with Han Woo, but Trevor is probably already picking fights up there like he used to.” Sammy laughed slightly. ‘Remember when he used to prank us in the morning?”

‘Oh God,” Rayne replied. ‘Waking up when you’ve only had four hours of sleep only for him to say he didn’t do anything to the coffee knowing damn well he did. That was the best way to wake up.” She laughed quietly, Sammy joining in.

‘But in all seriousness, I think they’re in a much better place than here. I can only imagine them sitting around a table eating Chinese food from Mrs. Cheng’s place down our old street, maybe even watching us…”

‘I miss them,” Rayne said quietly. ‘I miss all of them.”

‘I do too,” Sammy replied. ‘I think about them all the time… I’d give anything in the world to go back to that day and change something, anything, just so they would still be here.” He glanced at Rayne again. ‘I know I can’t do that… but I’m willing to try and do right by you and Parker so that they didn’t die for nothing. Someone’s gotta take care of you now anyways.” Rayne met his gaze slowly.

‘We’ll get Parker to Hilltop safely. Garrett and Jordan are good guys; they’ll take care of him like he was their own.” Tears came to Rayne’s eyes.

‘Thank you,” she murmured.

‘Of course,” Sammy said.

‘Sammy,” a voice called from over the radio. ‘It’s Jordan. We’re about to roll out, Negan’s on his way to get the boy. Said to tell you to get ready to roll out in forty-five.” Sammy cast an apologetic look to Rayne before he grabbed the radio from his belt, pressing a button on the side once it was close to his mouth.

‘Alright, will do. You guys be safe on the road and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. Sam out.” He answered, replacing the radio and turning to Rayne. ‘I need to go. You need anything, anything at all, just say the word and I’ll come running.” Rayne nodded. He paused, then took something out of his pocket, pressing whatever it was into Rayne’s hand. ‘Take this. It’s not much, but I know it was your favorite a long time ago.” Rayne’s brow furrowed as she looked down at the contents, seeing a piece of grape bubblegum still wrapped up. She smiled, looking back up at him.

All at once, Rayne was reminded of an old farewell they used to say to each other, something stupid that started off as a joke but then became a usual thing even as they got older.

‘Catch you on the flipside, Sammy-Boosh,” she said. Sammy paused, cursing under his breath and shaking his head.

‘Watch out for them storm clouds, Rayne-y Ray,” He said back. They shared a warm smile one last time before Sammy finally looked away, disappearing out the door. Rayne watched him go before glancing back down at Parker, bracing herself for what she was about to do.

‘It’s gonna be ok,” she whispered to Parker. ‘You’re gonna be ok. You’re gonna get better and we’re going to be happy again. Just like before.” The two siblings sat in silence, Rayne humming to him once again as she looked down at the piece of gum in her hand. Now wasn’t a good time to chew it, she knew. Knowing Sammy, he would say to save it for a rainy day, but as it was… Rayne pocketed the bit of candy, resolved to eat it at a later time before she resumed her vigil over Parker.

‘Well, ain’t that a beautiful sight,” Negan’s voice came from the doorway. Rayne looked up at him, seeing Negan leaning casually against the doorframe observing Rayne with Parker. ‘Gotta say darling, you look even more gorgeous when you’re holding that kid. Motherhood would suit you to an absolute T.” Negan grinned at her. Rayne wasn’t sure what to say as she glanced back down to the sleeping child in her arms. Sensing her unease, Negan pushed off the frame and walked over to where she was sitting. ‘He’s knocked clean out, huh?”

‘Yeah,” Rayne agreed, smoothing Parker’s hair. ‘He had a long night. Hopefully he sleeps all the way there.”

‘All kids like long car rides,” Negan continued. ‘Ain’t seen one yet that doesn’t pass the fuck out in the car. He’ll be alright.” He grinned again. When Rayne wouldn’t meet his stare, it faded until disappearing all together. Negan sighed quietly, a look of concern etching itself across his face. ‘Look Rayne-y girl… I know this is tough for you. Hell, anyone in your position would feel the exact same way you are right now. But he’s gonna be alright, you hear? I’ll make sure of it.” That at least made Rayne turn her gaze up to him. His ungloved hand reached out and grazed against Rayne’s cheek, thumbing away the tears that had fallen. They stayed this way for a moment longer before he guided her up onto her feet.

‘Come on, baby,” Negan said, wrapping his arm around her waist and leading her to the door. ‘It’s about that time.” Rayne didn’t need to ask what he meant when he said this, only followed obediently to the door. Parker didn’t budge a bit, completely oblivious to what was going on as Rayne continued.

With every step she took, her heart continued to tighten as though it were trapped in a vice that was steadily applying pressure. Tighter and tighter it grew and once they were outside, it almost became too much to bear. They’d come out to a concrete stairwell, one that over looked the fence that separated the entrance of the Sanctuary from the rest of the road. To her disgust, there were Walkers chained to every other railing, growling and reaching out to grab anyone that happened too close to the fence. Rayne ignored it, hoping the sounds of them didn’t wake Parker up. She turned back to the stairs, descending them carefully as she balanced Parker on her with one hand and used the other to grip the yellow railing until they reached the gravel below, Negan already waiting for her beside one of the three trucks that were parked nearby. Her silver eyes looked to the truck in question, her arms tightening around Parker protectively as she saw the two men that Sammy had told her about still talking with Carson.

‘He shouldn’t have one, but in case he does, it’s important to not hold him down,” she heard Carson explain. ‘Let it ride out, but if it lasts for longer than a minute or two, take the medicine I gave you and inject it into his arm. It should stop within seconds.” Catching sight of Rayne out of the corner of his eye, Carson turned to her and took notice of the sleeping boy in her arms. ‘Still asleep?”

‘Yeah,” she replied, gazing down at Parker. ‘He hasn’t moved at all.”

‘Good,” Carson noted. ‘He should be fine then. The medicine I gave him last night is likely still in his system, so likely Parker will just sleep it off.” Rayne nodded, reluctant to hand her brother over to the two strangers before her. ‘He’ll be fine, Rayne,” Carson assured her, her silver eyes looking deep into his. ‘He’ll be just fine.” Rayne took a deep breath, hugging her brother one more time.

‘I love you, Parker.” She whispered, kissing his forehead softly. ‘Sissy’ll see you soon, I promise.” With those words, Rayne walked to Carson and gently passed Parker to him, feeling as though her heart were being torn from her at the same time. Carson in turned climbed into the truck and placed Parker on the stretcher that’d been prepared for him, laying the boy down and covering him with a blanket before climbing out, letting the two men inside take over.

Rayne observed all of this from a distance, unsure if she could stop herself from crying should Parker wake up at any point as the rest of the men and women who were milling around outside the Sanctuary began piling into their respective cars, all of them shouting to one another and loading up last minute supplies before all of the engines simultaneously started up.

Rayne clutched her jacket just over her heart, never taking her eyes off the one with Parker inside as the gates opened to let the vehicles out, all of them heading down the gravel road past the row of Walkers. Even when they exited the gates, Rayne continued to watch them, blinking her eyes rapidly to keep from crying. Only when all the trucks had disappeared did she finally break her gaze from them, the gate closing once more and the rest of the people in the yard moving on with whatever they’d been doing before.

_He’s gone_ , Rayne realized, the rain drizzling down and bringing a chilling wind with it. _Parker’s gone._

She turned away from the gate, turning back towards the stairs. From the corner of her eye, Rayne saw Negan off a good few feet away talking to a couple of men with his back to her, effectively leaving her on her own. That was fine, she decided as Rayne took the stairs up to the door. She needed to be on her own for a bit anyways. _Maybe they could use some help in the gardens_ , Rayne thought as she entered the Sanctuary, walking along the catwalk until she reached another set of stairs leading down to the common areas. _Maybe some fresh air will help._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for the kind words and kudos! \^_^/


	8. To Forget Is To Heal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rayne struggles with coming to terms that Parker is gone from the Sanctuary, and Negan decides to surprise Rayne.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's that? You wanted two chapters in one night? I thought you'd never ask =D

To her surprise despite the sprinkling rain, there were other workers milling about moving heavy bags of soil and boxes of tools to different areas in the back when Rayne had arrived at the gardens. Thankfully no one really said anything about her being there which led her to believe that Negan hadn’t said anything to anyone else about her being off for the week. Even the supervisor that day had simply handed her a box filled with small containers and sent her to the greenhouse to work with the herbs. Apparently, the kitchen was running low on different ones and needed a bunch as soon as possible for tonight’s dinner.

Rayne didn’t need to be told twice to head towards it. Honestly, she didn’t know if she could handle being around others now anyways, not after this morning and a rough night of tossing and turning or waking up crying again. Even before her dream of her mother, all Rayne could see when she dozed off was Parker seizing, choking on his own vomit…

Rayne shook her head, the list and box in her hand reminding her of the reason she was in here in the first place. She still wasn’t sure why they needed things like thyme, rosemary, or even parsley seeing that they were living in an apocalypse and weren’t really considered priority food items but… salt and pepper only went so far on food. Thankfully, these herbs were housed in a room separate from the rest of the plants inside the greenhouse. Rayne was thankful for the isolation as she walked through the door, deeply inhaling the fresh smell of plants and dirt, feeling her weary spirit slowly unwinding.

She needed this, something else to focus on besides what was really going on now. Rayne was grateful to be off work, but she couldn’t… couldn’t stay in that room alone. Parker was on his way to Hilltop, a good few hours away by car and she doubted to hear anything about how he was until later today or even tomorrow. She wished that Sammy had gone with them, knowing that he at least would tell her right away.

_Even after the way I told him off, he still cares about us._

Rayne sighed heavily, putting aside the box she was holding and taking out the containers clearly labelled for what they had. She’d come to work against Negan’s wishes just for an escape, a way to keep her mind going and all she’d managed to do was continue to torture herself. _Just stay busy_ , she told herself, turning her attention to one of the rosemary plants and breaking off some sprigs, taking care to remove the dead ones while she was at it. _Just stay busy and don’t give yourself a chance to think about it._

And Rayne was successful in this. She managed to get a good chunk of the rosemary plants done and had moved on to the thyme when it happened again.

_…Her panic doubled tenfold when Parker started choking, his eyes rolling to the back of his head._

_‘My God,” Rayne cried as she turned her brother’s head to the side. ‘What…”_

_‘He’s choking on his own vomit,” Carson exclaimed, opening Parker’s tensed mouth to let as much out of the child’s mouth as possible. ‘His body is trying to go into shock!” …_

Rayne paused, dipping her head down and composing herself. But the more she fought it, the harder it became to push back. The fact that she hadn’t slept well wasn’t making it easier either. She willed herself to continue.

_… ‘I love you Parker, with all my heart and never forget that no matter what. There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do for you if it meant that you would have everything that you needed. I’d give up everything, just for you.”_

_‘I love you too, Sissy,” Parker murmured against her, shifting so that he was laying up against her chest…_

Tears hit the wooden table as Rayne continued to push herself to finish, not even acknowledging them. _If I pretend they aren’t there, they’ll go away._

_…Rayne clutched her jacket just over her heart, never taking her eyes off the one with Parker inside as the gates opened to let the vehicles out, all of them heading down the gravel road past the row of Walkers. Even when they exited the gates, Rayne continued to watch them, blinking her eyes rapidly to keep from crying…_

By this point, Rayne had given up holding back her tears and had stopped to rest her hands on the table, her body shaking with her quiet sobs. _He’s still a baby,_ Rayne thought. _He never asked for any of this. He should be playing with the other kids, growing up and being happy, not coming close to death all the time._

‘It’s not fair,” she muttered quietly. ‘Nothing has ever been fair for him.” Rayne briefly thought of her father, wondering if he even knew about what was going on. She knew Negan had to have gone back seeing as it was now part of the Saviors’ collection of outposts. Would he have told her father? Rayne doubted it.

Negan disliked her father, something he always made sure to make apparent when he talked about him. He would have no reason to tell Corvus about Parker, and even if he did, Rayne didn’t think he would even believe or understand. Sammy would likely be the only person to tell him, but Rayne questioned he’d even listen to Sammy seeing how he was the reason the Saviors were able to so easily take over their community.

_He probably doesn’t even care,_ Rayne thought. More tears fell at this. Even if she was technically an adult now, Rayne still felt like a child for crying for him, for wanting Corvus to be the father he once was…

_I’m all alone now._

She shakily exhaled, trying to collect herself. Rayne couldn’t help but feel sorry for herself though she felt far worse for Parker, who would be all alone at Hilltop, would likely be scared out of his mind when he was more conscious to realize that Rayne was no where to be seen. Her tears fell harder at the thought of him crying for her, asking where she was and why she wasn’t there…

_I’m no better than Dad for sending him away…_

She must have said that out loud.

‘Don’t you fucking dare compare yourself to that German asshole,” Negan’s deep voice said from the door. Rayne gasped slightly and quickly scrubbed at her eyes with her sleeve. ‘Didn’t I tell you to take the rest of the week off, Rayne-y girl?” Rayne paused, not turning to face him.

‘I couldn’t stay in there,” she admitted. ‘I needed to get outside for a while.” She heard him close the door behind him, then heard the unmistakable sounds of Lucille being propped up against the wall.

‘Why couldn’t you stay in your room, baby girl?” he asked, his voice coming from right behind her. Rayne shivered slightly as his hands came to rest on her hips, pulling her back into him.

‘It’s too quiet,” she admitted. ‘It’s too quiet and I don’t want to be reminded that Parker isn’t there.”

‘Aw sugar, if you didn’t want to be alone, you could have come and found me.” He replied in that rich southern baritone voice. Maybe it was just her but… his voice was oddly comforting, much more than the fresh air had been.

‘You’re busy though,” Rayne answered, catching herself from leaning into his touch. ‘You have bigger things to worry about than me.” God knew he already had an entire community to keep safe, managing everyone’s points and keeping all his outposts in order.

‘You ain’t used to people taking care of you, are you?” Negan asked, his head resting against hers as they stood there. Rayne shook her head.

‘Mom was the only person that really ever did,” She admitted. ‘Even when her body was giving out, all she cared about was whether or not Parker and I had everything we needed.” Rayne stopped for a moment, letting those pleasant memories play out before her eyes.

She was quickly snapped out of her reverie when Negan’s hands- which had previously been on her hips- began to travel up and down her sides slowly and sensually. Rayne glanced down at them, uncertainty crossing her features for but a moment before her head turned to meet his hazel gaze. So much taller than she, Rayne had to bend her head to look up into his eyes, almost afraid at the chaotic mix of emotion in those enchanting hazel orbs of his- lust, concern, and affection, three things she’d never think could go together. Yet somehow, they did, all in this man who clearly adored her in ways she couldn’t comprehend.

‘You’re not alone, anymore,” he said, tucking her hair away from her face. ‘You don’t have to prove anything to me, Rayne-y girl. You won’t be safer anywhere else than here.” She wanted to believe that so desperately. As if reading her mind, Negan added, ‘What do I have to do to make you believe that?” Rayne wasn’t sure how to answer that. Parker was already heading off to Hilltop, something she originally had planned to barter with to get him out of here but now that he was gone…

She felt as if there was a void within her that she couldn’t fill with just her brother’s well-being alone.

‘I don’t know,” Rayne quietly admitted. ‘I’ve never been without Parker or my friends since all of this started. I don’t know what to do on my own, let alone what others can do for me.” Negan gave her a knowing smile.

‘Doesn’t sound like you don’t know what to do,” he started, his voice dropping in tone as his hands continued moving hypnotically over her sides. He bent down to whisper in her ear, his breath leaving goosebumps in its wake. ‘I think you’re just lonely. And if you’d stop playing hard to get, you’d realize that you don’t have to be.”

_Yes_ , her mind agreed. _Yes, I’m lonely._ Her body had begun reacting to his ministrations as she breathed him in, her knees going weak. _Take it away from me, please_.

‘If you were mine, you wouldn’t have to be lonely anymore. You’d have everything you wanted, everything you never knew you needed.” Rayne leaned into him at his insistence, his warmth so much more soothing than anything else she could think of. His head leaned against hers, lips curled into a smirk when she didn’t pull away from him. Said lips grazed against her cheek, something else she didn’t pull away from either. Getting bolder, he turned her in his arms, noticing how Rayne was looking up at him with those haunting silver eyes.

‘Are you lonely, Rayne-y girl?” Negan asked. Rayne hesitated for a moment, then finally nodded. ‘Use your words, kitten.”

‘Yes,” Rayne replied. ‘I miss my brother.”

‘Of course you do, darling,” Negan began. ‘You’re all alone now, crying by yourself in a shitty room filled with plants. I want to see my Rayne-y girl smile again. I want you to be happy here.” Rayne looked back up at him without realizing that she’d looked away.

_I want to be happy again too._

‘Come on,” he said, coming to her side and taking one of her small hands in his, leading her towards the door. ‘Let’s get you out of here for a while.”

‘Where are we going?” Rayne asked, following right behind him as Negan opened the door. He released her hand long enough for her to exit before him, grabbing Lucille as he followed her out into the chilly air. She shivered involuntarily, crossing her arms over her chest. Honestly, what was up with rain bringing cold weather with it? Wasn’t it supposed to be spring already?

‘Figured you wouldn’t be in the best mood after your brother left, so I’m taking you out for a bit,” Negan answered, wrapping an arm around her shoulders as they walked to the entrance of the greenhouse. He looked back down at her with a smile on his face. ‘Consider it a couple’s getaway.” Rayne looked up at him, more surprised to be leaving the Sanctuary than what he just called it.

‘Where to?” she asked again as they passed by a couple of people who were carrying a particularly large bag of dead leaves and plants to the compost heap. The rain had stopped, but the wind was still harsh as ever, making her shiver in response. Negan drew her a little closer to him, offering extra warmth which Rayne accepted.

‘You’ll see when we get there,” Negan answered. ‘No sense in killing the surprise.” Rayne looked away from him when they reached the stairs leading up into the Sanctuary, Negan releasing her so that she could ascend a little easier. ‘You ever rode on a bike before?” he called after her, meeting her at the top and opening the door for her again. _Don’t think I’ll ever get used to him doing that_. Rayne looked at him in confusion.

‘Like a motorcycle or an actual bike?” Rayne inquired. Negan chuckled at her question, leading her towards another part of the Sanctuary she hadn’t been to yet. Judging by all the tools and tires laying around, it looked like… a garage?

‘Motorcycle,” he clarified, the men and women around them dropping to a knee as Negan passed. ‘Your dad ever take you out on one?” Rayne shook her head. Her father had mentioned once that he used to have one in Germany, but the only thing she’d ever seen him drive was the family’s beat up Sedan. She tried to imagine Corvus on a bike but found no such luck.

‘No,” Rayne answered. ‘Never been on one at all actually.” Negan looked thoroughly pleased with this information.

‘Good,” he grinned, grabbing a pack from one of the nearby hooks situated near a large rollup door and handing it to her to put on. ‘Glad I get to be your first.” He eyed her appreciatively as Rayne shouldered the pack, adjusting the straps until they were comfortable. She didn’t say anything to him about that, though given the blush that settled on her cheeks, Negan knew she’d caught the double entendre. Realizing that he was staring at her, Rayne turned her eyes back to him.

‘What?” Rayne asked, a ghost of a smile on her lips.

‘Just enjoying the view,” Negan said, wrapping an arm around her waist and leading her outside. A couple yards away, she noticed a few motorcycles parked in a row by some metal poles sitting on some shelving. There were already three men waiting by them, all of them wearing packs like she was, and guns strapped to their backs. As they got closer, Rayne recognized one of them to be Sammy, who was right by one of the red bikes checking over something on the front. At their approach, he looked up, mimicking the other two men in dropping to a knee until Negan motioned for them to get up.

‘We all set?” he asked, Lucille resting on his shoulder as his other arm rested on Rayne’s hip, holding her in place. The two men nodded their affirmative. ‘Sammy?” Negan asked, making it a point to pull Rayne a little further into his side.

‘Yes sir,” the younger man replied. Though he was doing a good job in playing it off, Rayne could tell by the set of his jaw that he wasn’t happy with Negan holding onto Rayne the way that he was. His brown eyes met hers for a split second before he went back to what he was doing.

‘Good,” Negan answered, leading Rayne towards the lone black bike on the end. Once they reached it, he surprised her by handing Rayne Lucille. ‘Hang on to her for a moment, will ya doll?” Rayne, shaking free of her shock, nodded and took hold of Lucille, holding her carefully as Negan began checking the bike over. Her silver eyes watched him for a moment before they moved over Lucille.

She was heavy (it was still weird to her that the bat was considered a person almost) like most bats were, the wood smooth and shiny despite the barbed wire that was wound around the top. Rayne kept a firm grip on Lucille, not wanting to drop her and risk angering Negan, as she turned her this way and that, curious despite herself. Truth told, there wasn’t anything special that Rayne could notice right away; no defining markings, carvings, or even any blemishes in the wood save for the spots that were nicked thanks to the barbed wire. But Rayne knew from personal experience that this wasn’t just your run of the mill go to weapon when killing Walkers; Lucille was a symbol of power.

She was also a symbol of fear and pain, both of which welled inside her as she continued to hold Negan’s most prized possession.

With those feelings came the images of her friends, how terrified and shocked they were when they met their ends… Rayne looked up from Lucille to notice that Sammy was looking her way from where he was crouching. Silver met brown for a long moment, the same feelings that Rayne was experiencing holding Lucille being reflected in Sammy’s eyes.

‘Alright then,” Negan said drawing her attention back to him. He turned back at her, watching how she was holding Lucille delicately as though she were made of glass. Rayne would argue though that it was just her unease with said bat that was making her wary. ‘Damn,” he said, coming to rest in front of her. ‘Now that, is what I like to see.” Rayne blinked in perplexity. ‘You ain’t scared of her one bit, darling.” Negan smirked at this, his hand coming up to cover hers on Lucille. ‘You shouldn’t be; she likes you, Rayne-y girl. And if she didn’t, well, she’d let you know _real_ fucking quick.”

Rayne didn’t know what to say in response as she handed Lucille off to him, only for Negan to walk around behind her and stick Lucille in between Rayne’s back and the pack, situating her so that none of the barbed wire caught Rayne’s head. When he was satisfied that Lucille wouldn’t move, Negan rested his hand on the small of her back and guided her back to the bike, patting the back of the seat invitingly.

‘Hop on, Rayne-y girl.” Negan said, helping Rayne up and onto the bike before he took a seat on the main one, glancing behind him to back up the bike as the others did the same. Negan glanced back at her, noticing how Rayne looked a little nervous. ‘Don’t be scared, Rayne-y girl,” he murmured to her. ‘I ain’t wrecked a fucking bike ever in my life. You just take care of Lucille back there and hang onto me.”

‘Ok,” Rayne answered, trying to hide the trepidation in her voice. She scooted so that she was flush against Negan’s back and wrapped her arms around his waist, feeling his stomach muscles ripple under her hands.

She jumped slightly when the engine roared to life, gripping him a little tighter than she meant to before relaxing slightly as they rolled forwards, Rayne staying still. _Ok, this isn’t so bad,_ she thought as Negan rode towards the gate, the other three men right behind them. _Definitely doable._ Relaxing a bit as they made it out to the road, Rayne chanced moving her head from where it rested on Negan’s back to look around.

At least, that’s what she wanted to do before they sped up quickly, Rayne immediately renewing her grip on Negan.

_I changed my mind! I don’t like this!_ She closed her eyes as the wind whipped her hair back, the cold air making her snuggle further against Negan. She felt the vibration against her cheek when he laughed, obviously amused at her reactions.

‘You’re not scared, are you Rayne-y girl?” he called back to her, thoroughly amused at the death grip she had on him. Rayne refused to move.

‘A little,” Rayne admitted, a fierce blush coming to her cheeks. It was embarrassing to her that she could run along tall buildings and jump to the next ones (provided they weren’t far away) despite being so high in the air, climb up trees nimbly to shoot down Walkers, _and_ throw herself between Lucille and her father and yet was terrified of being on a speeding motorcycle. Whoever would have thought?

They rode on in silence, Rayne still hanging onto Negan tightly before she chanced opening her eyes, noticing that the landscape around them had changed. Her silver eyes darted this way and that, still not chancing to move from him. Besides, he was warm and though the brunt of the cold air was blocked by his big body, Rayne still didn’t want to move the wrong way and risk throwing them off balance or losing Lucille.

Gradually, when it became apparent that Negan did indeed know what he was doing and that he’d done a good job in securing Lucille, Rayne started to relax, sitting up a little better and looking around more. The trees were starting to bud with new leaves, and flowers were starting to peek up from the ground, some of them already blooming with colorful yellow and orange blooms. The air was still cool as they went by, but it smelled fresh with the rain mingled with the scents of the flowers. Every now and then, however, they would pass by a Walker that had been run over with a car, a couple still moving around and trying to reach for them before being taken out by the occasional gun shot behind them. Rayne didn’t need to ask where it was coming from.

She didn’t want to admit it but being outside the walls of the Sanctuary did make her feel a little better. Her spirit was starting to unwind being back out in nature, even if her cheeks were damn near numb from the cold. Rayne glanced to Negan, catching a glimpse of his face in the rearview mirrors on either handlebar. He was focused intently on the road, though there was a small smile on his face whenever Rayne moved her hands. Strange… it was for the first time that she took notice of how handsome he really was, though she was already aware of it. Negan caught her eyes briefly in the mirror before Rayne ducked her head back down quickly, a small smile teasing at her lips.

Ok… maybe he wasn’t as bad as she initially thought.

Rayne took a deep breath of the fresh air and leaned her head back against his back, readjusting her hands so that they lay on either side of his chest. She glanced back up into the mirror, curious of his reaction. Sure enough, there was a big smile on his face, that light that she’d seen so much within his hazel orbs coming back in full force. Rayne lay her head back against his back, closing her eyes. _Maybe I could get used to this,_ she told herself. _Maybe it’s not so bad being married to him…_

_Or maybe you’re just flirting because you’re lonely._ Rayne paused at that thought. _Was_ she flirting with him? It was true that she was attracted to him, especially seeing how much trouble she had trying to ignore him when he was close to her as well as that reoccurring dream of him but flirting? That was something new for sure.

Rayne was snapped out of thinking of this when Negan started slowing down, her eyes opening to see that they were pulling into a small town. She lifted her head and looked around, noticing a few shops that she recognized and others that she didn’t. Everything was clearly run down from the apocalypse as evident by the shattered windows and broken-down doors. There were a few broken down cars in the street, the traffic lights long since dead as they hung over the streets. _Wonder how many people were here before it all happened,_ Rayne thought.

Finally, when they reached a street that surprisingly only had three buildings that were still standing amidst others that had either been burned down or completely torn down, Negan coasted to a stop and kicked out the kick stand, shutting off the engine and turning back to face Rayne.

‘How’s that for your first time on a bike?” he asked with a smile. ‘Don’t think I didn’t notice you relaxing back there.” Rayne smiled slightly, tucking some of her windblown hair behind her ears.

‘It wasn’t bad,” she admitted. ‘It was fun looking around at everything.” Negan grinned back at her, patting her leg softly as he got up and off the bike, helping her off as Sammy and the other two men followed suit in parking the bikes.

‘Good,” he said, taking Lucille out from where she rested on Rayne’s back. ‘Good, good.” He paused for a moment after removing her, noticing something on Rayne’s neck. ‘Stay still,” Negan ordered, moving her head slightly and brushing her long hair out of the way. Rayne shivered involuntarily as his gloved hand brushed against her skin as he examined whatever had caught his attention.

‘What is it?” Rayne asked, trying not to appear worried.

‘Looks like Lucille gave you a little love bite, Rayne-y girl,” Negan noted, carefully brushing away the blood that had come up from the tiny pinprick. ‘She must really, _really_ like you.” Rayne cast him a worried look, one of her hands coming up to feel for it before he stopped her. ‘Don’t worry, I’ll kiss it better,” Negan said, bending down to kiss the tiny wound gently, the tip of his tongue laving across it just as softly, but it was enough to make Rayne gasp quietly. He pulled back after a moment, running his fingers under her jaw just as tenderly. Silver eyes locked with his hazels, a devilish smile on his lips as he wrapped an arm around her, turning his attention to the three men who were focusing on getting their weapons ready for scavenging. The only one that really seemed to take notice that something had passed between the two was Sammy, who glanced up for a moment before looking back at his rifle. Rayne turned her gaze away in turn.

‘Clear out those two buildings on the end,” Negan ordered. Rayne took that as a chance to look at the two buildings in question. They looked like old clothing stores by the looks of them, the signs that used to be on the outside long gone. ‘Rayne-y girl and I’ll take this one down here.” His stare grew hard. ‘Now you sorry shits can handle yourselves, so don’t come running in here yelling for me unless you see a fucking horde or some shit.” All the men gave an affirmative and went off to do as they were told. Once all three of the men were gone, Negan looked back down at her.

‘Ready for your surprise, Rayne-y girl?” Negan asked, pulling her a little tighter into him. Rayne nodded as he turned them both towards the store in question. ‘You told me awhile ago that you like painting, and a little birdy told me that you really like watercolor. Now I need to know if that’s true.” Rayne’s eyes lit up at the mention of watercolor paints.

‘They’re my favorite,” she affirmed, unable to hide her smile. ‘I liked the other types, but I had the most fun with them.” Rayne paused for a moment. ‘Why do you ask?” Negan gave her a smirk and brought her to the door of the building, stopping her before she went further.

‘Stay here for a minute,” he said. When Rayne gave him a questioning look, he continued. ‘I gotta clear this fucker out of the undead pricks before I bring you in. It won’t take long.”

‘You sure you don’t need me to go with you?” Rayne asked without thinking. Negan looked over his shoulder at her.

‘I’m sure, but I appreciate the concern, darling,” he said with a smile. ‘Don’t worry, Rayne-y girl. I got Lucille and a leather jacket. Ain’t nothing gonna fucking fuck with me and I’m sure as hell not dying until I’m good and ready to.”

‘Alright,” Rayne agreed. Negan cast her one more look before he ducked his head to avoid the glass shards hanging down, disappearing into the store. Rayne peeked inside the dusty glass, trying her best to see what was inside to get at least a general idea of what this place once was. It was difficult to tell, but it looked like it was some kind of arts and crafts store judging by the long-faded advertisements on the nearest wall showcasing a fifty percent off sale on fabrics, and another that promoted a buy one get one free scrapbook album sale. The thought of this really being such a thing made butterflies well up in her belly.

Her father never let her scavenge the old one that they’d found closer to their old community, but she’d gotten lucky once and managed to sneak some art supplies back one time. Rayne wondered if her old set was still hidden behind that loose panel in their closet or if her father had found it. It was difficult to say at this point. _I wonder if there are any good paints in there,_ Rayne thought, already making a mental list of everything that she’d need. But no, no. That couldn’t be the reason that Negan brought her here. He probably only brought her along to get her out of the Sanctuary for a while.

‘Rayne-y girl,” came his voice suddenly. _Speak of the devil and he will come,_ Rayne thought as she wandered closer to the door. Negan opened it for her, having unlocked it from the other side. ‘It’s safe now, you can come the fuck on in.”

‘Alright,” she answered following him back through the door, avoiding the glass the best she could. Her silver eyes looked around them, her jaw dropping slightly to realize that this was indeed a craft store. A smile started on her face, glee threatening to overcome her as she glanced about.

‘God, I haven’t been in a craft store in forever,” Rayne admitted, observing everything. It almost looked to be completely untouched with how much remained on the shelves. Sure, there was evidence that looters had been in to steal the registers and other items they thought would be necessary in the new world they lived in, but as for most of the fabrics, artificial flowers, and other items, there was more than enough. Negan sat back, watching her take this in with childlike wonder. Finally, her eyes made it back to him.

‘Surprise,” he said with a wide grin, coming back to rest in front of her. ‘You’ve had a rough time lately, Rayne-y girl. You’ve been dealing with some heavy shit; your brother’s been sick, you’ve been working your ass off avoiding creepy motherfuckers, you’re all alone now. You deserve something nice to make you forget all that.” Rayne’s heart swelled, hoping that he was about to tell her what she had a hunch he was going to. ‘You said you like watercolor paints, right?”

‘Yes,” Rayne said, trying to keep the excitement out of her voice, something that didn’t go unseen by Negan, who’s smile only grew.

‘Then go pick out some.” He said, gesturing towards the paint section. ‘Fill up that backpack of yours with what you need, Rayne-y girl.” Rayne glanced back at him, hardly daring to believe that he just told her that.

‘Wait… really?” She asked in disbelief. Negan nodded.

‘Go fucking crazy,” Negan insisted. ‘Get what you need.” Tears filled Rayne’s eyes, her smile returning to her face. Before she could stop herself, she rushed forward, wrapping her arms around him and taking Negan by surprise. Rayne gripped him tightly, unable to stop the tears of pure joy from falling.

‘Thank you,” she whispered, Negan finally wrapping her in an embrace of his own. ‘Thank you so much.”

‘You’re most welcome, doll face,” he answered, kissing the crown of her head. She pulled back, looking up at him with those sparkling silver eyes, an actual smile on her face. ‘Go on, sweetheart,” he urged her. ‘Take as much time as you need. Those pricks next door are gonna take a while. I’ll be looking around to see if there’s anything good in here. Yell if you need me.” Rayne nodded, wiping her eyes and heading for the section he pointed out before glancing back at him as Negan headed off in the opposite direction.

As she turned a corner, Rayne brought her hands up to her mouth, unable to stop the quiet laughter that escaped her. She couldn’t believe it. She could not actually believe that this was real! It was like a dream that she was walking in, one that Rayne didn’t want to wake up from. Her silver eyes scanned the aisles of paints, taking note of the different types available to her. She took off her pack, opening it up as she started scanning everything.

‘Paper, washi tape, masking fluid, brushes, paint,” Rayne said aloud, grabbing her selections and loading them up. The brushes she took more time with, examining the ones that were out carefully to check for any damages that would impede their performance. There were a few that she dismissed immediately, but others she tossed into the side pocket until she found a small bag that was big enough to hold the brushes and some Micron pens that she found. Once she’d built up a nice collection of brushes and other essentials, Rayne moved on to her toughest choice; the paints.

Truth told, there were a couple of brands she never tried, others that were too far gone to be useable as in the case of some of the tubes, but when Rayne found her absolute favorite, she almost lost it.

‘Yes!” she murmured, grabbing one of the pallets. She opened it up carefully to see, to her absolute delight, it was still in pristine condition. It would never be the one she had for years, nor would it ever replace the very first set that her mother gave her, but it was the perfect one. She loaded it into the bag, browsing some more just to be sure that she had everything. God knew that Rayne may never be able to return one day, so she was going to take full advantage of this while she had a chance.

As she neared the endcap, Rayne found some pencils and watercolor books to add next. She didn’t think she’d need the books, but it would be nice to have a refresher just in case she needed them. Rayne also grabbed a hard-wooden board to tape her paper onto for good measure as well as two jars for water. Finally, she decided that that was all she needed for now. _If the world hadn’t ended, this would be at least a good two hundred dollars’ worth of stuff,_ Rayne thought, shouldering the pack. _And a hundred percent worth it too._ She wandered around to the other side, deciding to stroll about to see what all the store had.

It was your typical craft store filled with cross stitch, yarn, and other goods in different aisles, but it still felt like home to Rayne. That was the case in just about any art store she went to; anytime she entered, it felt like she was coming home from a long trip. The old store she frequented pretty much knew her by name, all the employees eager to talk to her and offer commissions for some of her paintings. Even her hometown knew her as one of their local artists, people flocking from all over to see some of her works in competitions.

‘I miss those days,” Rayne said to herself as she came upon some fabric, deciding to take a piece or two to use as a rag later. Now that the world had ended, there was no need for art but… at least she’d have something to keep her mind busy with on those nights she couldn’t sleep. In fact, Rayne thought, there was a couple of ideas already popping into her mind as she wandered. Right as she was reaching the far end of the store, she became aware of the sounds of a heavy rain falling outside, thunder booming in the distance.

‘No riding back for now,” Rayne noted. That was fine by her. She didn’t mind not leaving here for a while, even if it meant she was going to be alone in here with Negan…

Right as she thought that, Rayne caught sight of a light coming from the back of the store, up top likely where the managers of the store used to work. She looked up at it in curiosity, having never seen it before. Was that where he was? Negan _did_ say after all that he was going to look around for other things to scavenge, likely as something to come back for later. As she continued to watch the lights, she caught sight of him walking past the large glass window that over looked the floor, clearly doing something judging by the way he went to different sections of the room until he caught sight of Rayne looking up at him.

Negan paused at the window, looking down at her with a smile on his face, admiring how happy she looked before motioning for her to come upstairs with him. Rayne nodded and headed for the door that likely led to the staircase, opening and closing it behind her. As she crossed the threshold, she paused. Maybe it was just her, but she got the sneaky suspicion that he was planning something. Surely, he didn’t do this simply out of the goodness of his heart. Even so, this was touching. It was truly heart warming that Negan had gone out of his way to bring her here, let her get what she wanted…

But she had a feeling of what he wanted in return.

_You feel as though you can’t trust him for what he’s done even though there is proof before you that he may not be all that he seems,_ her mother’s words from her dream echoed. This was true. He’d shown her that there was a kind side to him.

_Everything you have ever done has been for Parker._

_Everything for Parker._

It wasn't like she was selling her soul... it was just her hand in marriage, doing whatever wives and husbands do together, though she had a good idea of what that entailed. Parker was depending on her to do the right thing, even if it meant she'd be giving up her freedom. Sammy wouldn’t be happy, nor would her father, but if it meant that Parker would get better and that he would live a long and happy life, then it would be worth it in the end.

That alone was enough for her to make her decision.

Taking a deep breath, Rayne put a hand on the railing and began ascending.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... I think it goes without saying that we know what's coming in the next chapter. ;) Don't worry, it'll be out soon. 
> 
> I'm gonna need all the comments and kudos in the world for the next one. I've already got a cruel beta reader and husband that are constantly playing 'Let's Get It On' every time I turn around XD Thanks again for all the love you've given this story. You guys are awesome!


	9. Possession

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally here, you beautiful creatures. Just in case though...
> 
> WARNING: This chapter is INCREDIBLY NSFW! (Well, kinda, but you get the idea). This is your one and only warning. It's been a long time coming and I finally did it. (And yes, my beta reader is a very happy lady right now. I still hate her for playing Let's Get It On.) I hope to God everyone likes it and it finally scratches that itch I've been building up to. (Don't worry, there's more to come.)
> 
> You're very welcome.

Rayne’s heart beat faster and faster as she climbed the stairs, following the light from the upstairs room to keep from falling. _Am I about to do this,_ she thought to herself, getting closer to her destination. _Am I really going to go through with this?_

 _You must,_ came that firm voice in her mind again. _You must do this. Everything for Parker._

That was easier said than done though.

Finally, though it felt like forever, Rayne reached the head of the stairs, standing just outside the room Negan was waiting for her in. From here, she could see that there were several candles lit inside, serving as their only source of light. It cast a romantic glow out to where she stood, almost beckoning her inside. Rayne hesitated again, still fighting herself over this. She had to remind herself for the umpteenth time that it was just her hand in marriage, nothing more and nothing less. It would just be her body that she would be using as payment for helping Parker.

 _You can do this,_ Rayne tried to reassure herself. _You can do this. It’ll be ok._

‘Come on in, Rayne-y girl,” Negan’s voice called to her from further in the room. ‘I won’t bite… unless you’re into that shit.” He laughed. Rayne took a deep breath one more time, resigning herself to her fate as she pushed open the door, entering the top office at last. A quick look around confirmed her suspicions about this being an old office for managers, indeed one that had seen better days. Still, it looked as though someone at one point had made this their home as evident by the two mattresses stacked on top of each other. Candles were everywhere, some burned too low, others new looking as though they’d just been lit.

Her eyes continued to scan the room until they rested on Negan, who was sitting in the old office chair off to the side with his jacket off, wearing only his shirt, pants, and boots. One of his wrists was wrapped up in white bandages, something she hadn’t noticed before, and the other was resting on his knee with a glass filled with amber liquid. She glanced behind him at the desk, seeing that there was an old bottle of whiskey just sitting there. _Did he have that with him this whole time?_

Upon noticing her looking at him, Negan smiled up at her.

‘There you are,” he said, taking a sip from the glass. ‘You find everything you needed?”

‘Yeah,” Rayne said, shifting the pack on her back. ‘Surprisingly a lot of their stuff is still in good condition. I was worried at first when I got closer to them.”

‘Cool,” Negan said, his other hand rubbing his knee, those hazel eyes staring her down. ‘Set your stuff down, sweetheart. We ain’t got nowhere to be with this rain falling. And lock that door behind you.” Rayne paused for a moment, then nodded, closing and locking the door first before setting the pack down beside Lucille. Just as she moved to turn around, he stopped her.

‘Take off that jacket and your boots. You don’t need them right now.” _This is really happening_ , Rayne thought, doing as she was bid and removing her jacket, putting it down on her backpack before bending over to start unlacing her boots. She could feel Negan’s eyes on her the entire time as she shucked both off her feet, feeling very much exposed under that heated stare. Finally, Rayne straightened up and turned towards him, one arm folded over her stomach to hold her elbow. Negan smiled at her obedience, patting his lap invitingly. Rayne need not ask what he wanted as she walked towards him, feeling like her heart would beat out of her chest any second now. Slowly, she sank down onto his knee before he pulled her completely up onto his lap, trapping her there with an arm around her waist.

‘Feeling better now, Rayne-y girl?” He asked, rubbing her side erotically. Rayne nodded. ‘Good, good, good,” Negan murmured, resting his hand on her hip and taking another sip of the whiskey before handing it to Rayne. She accepted it, looking down at the liquid curiously. ‘Take a drink, baby,” he said. ‘It’ll make you feel more relaxed.” Rayne looked at him for a moment before she did just that, slowly sipping it. It was some fine whisky given that it went down surprisingly smoothly, kindling a warm fire in her belly when she handed it back to Negan. He finished it off and put the glass on the desk behind him, turning his attention back to Rayne.

‘You know I care for you, right?” he asked her, rubbing her leg gently. Rayne nodded her affirmation; he’d said it before anyways, so she may as well accept that it was true. ‘You do?”

‘Yes,” Rayne answered. Negan kissed her cheek at her answer, sending chills down her spine at how sensual he was being. He pulled her legs up and over the arm rest, putting his arm over them to keep them there.

‘You never answered my question last night,” Negan finally said, cutting straight to the chase. Rayne looked up at him, one hand coming to rest on his chest as the other folded over into her lap. ‘I asked you if I found someone that knew what was wrong with your brother if you would marry me. I’ve been pretty fucking patient waiting for that answer, now I want to know what you’re gonna do.”

‘I never got a chance to,” Rayne pointed out as her thumb rubbed against the material of his shirt.

‘No, you didn’t,” Negan agreed, rubbing her legs as softly as she caressed his chest. ‘But now you do. I did all this for you because I care for you. I wanted to prove to you that I can give you what you need and want, that I can save your little brother. Now I want _you_ as my wife,” Negan finished, staring deep into her eyes. Rayne was slightly taken aback by the possessiveness in his voice, but at the same time, it made her feel… _safe_. She _actually_ felt safe with him…

‘So, what’s it gonna be?” he asked again. ‘Do you want to be my wife, my queen, doing what I say and living the good life with me? Or do you want to keep working for your survival like Sammy is?” Rayne looked down at her hand for a moment, swallowing what saliva had gathered to moisten her throat that had suddenly gone dry.

_Everything for Parker._

‘You promise you’ll take care of Parker?” she asked, turning back towards him. Negan brought a hand up to stroke her cheek.

‘Of course, I will. I already proved that to you, didn’t I?” Rayne nodded before she paused, a most worrisome thought coming into her mind.

‘You won’t… force me to do anything I don’t want to?” Negan sensed what she meant.

'Rayne, baby, you ever tell me no and I'll give you your space. We won't do anything you're not a hundred and ten percent sure you want to do." Rayne heard the sincerity in his voice, her eyes looking deep into his own.

That was enough to quiet any further doubts she may have had.

‘Alright,” Rayne began, accepting what she was about to say. ‘I’ll marry you.” Negan’s eyes lit up at this, a triumphant smile growing on his face.

‘Fucking great,” he said, cupping her chin in his hand and kissing her. Rayne kissed him back, putting a hand on his cheek. Sensing her willingness, Negan brought both hands to her hips, turning her so that each of her legs was on either side of his hips. Rayne jumped slightly, but otherwise didn't fight him as it allowed her to kiss him more fully, both hands coming to rest on either side of his neck. Negan hummed in approval as his tongue danced along her lower lip, asking for entry before she finally opened her mouth more fully for him, quietly moaning as his tongue crashed against her own.

Not realizing it, Rayne's hips had begun moving back and forth against the gradually hardening bulge in Negan's pants, his hands guiding her against him, even raising his hips now and then to press against the apex of her thighs. Rayne moaned quietly against his mouth, her entire body feeling as though it were on fire the longer the kiss went on. Finally breaking away so they could both catch their breaths, Negan pulled back, a predatory grin on his face as he took in Rayne's flushed face, her hips coming to a stop when he pulled away.

‘Keep going,” He ordered, urging her hips forward. ‘You don’t have to fucking stop just because I’m not kissing you.” Rayne obeyed him, pressing down on his lap as a quiet moan escaped her, her lower lip getting sucked into her mouth as she gazed deep into his eyes. Negan met her stare, both of his hands coming around to grab her ass through her jeans, massaging the firm globes roughly.

‘Goddamn you’re sexy,” he growled, groaning loudly at the heat coming from her pussy. ‘You want this? Right here, right now?”

‘Yes,” Rayne answered, pressing her forehead against his. ‘Please…” Negan needed no further encouragement as he pushed her off him gently, Rayne’s hands going under his shirt to push it off him. Negan removed it at her encouragement, pulling her in for another kiss, this one more primal and aggressive than the others they’d shared before. It didn’t take long for him to do the same with her shirt, Rayne willingly doing as he asked and dropping the garment to the floor before kissing him once more, pulling him down for another kiss.

Negan quickly took control, grabbing both of her thighs and lifting her up so that her legs wrapped around his waist, bringing her round to the mattresses before laying her down. Rayne scooted back at his insistence, letting him take off her pants slowly, leaving kisses on her newly exposed skin once they were gone. Rayne shivered in delight as he continued kissing his way up her body, covering her with his much heavier frame.

‘Fuck,” she cried when Negan latched onto her neck, sucking on her skin hard enough to leave hickies, Rayne’s nails dragging down his back. Negan groaned into her neck in response, biting a little harder making Rayne mewl weakly. He reared up from her, sitting back on his knees as he reached for the knife on his hip. Rayne froze at the sight of the blade, making Negan look at her, asking her permission with a tilt of his head. Rayne nodded her consent, relaxing despite him running the sharp tip up her belly until it snagged on the middle of her bra, easily slicing it in half before doing the same to the straps causing the garment to fall completely from her, exposing her sizable breasts to his lustful stare.

Rayne shyly moved to cover them before Negan stopped her hand.

‘Don’t fucking hide from me,” he ordered, his voice much deeper and huskier than before. ‘Let me see them titties.” Rayne’s heart swelled at the tone of his voice, biting her lip and laying both hands on either side of her head. ‘Good girl,” he cooed, Rayne squeezing her thighs together briefly before spreading them at Negan’s insistence, his knife going back to its place on his hip before Negan turned his attention to her soaking panties.

He leaned down slowly, pressing a kiss to the center of her chest first, lower and lower till he reached the top of her black panties. He looked up at her, meeting her silver gaze with a predatory smile before he pulled down her panties slowly, sensually, kissing the insides of her calves teasingly as he brought them up to his nose, inhaling her scent before sucking the material into his mouth, groaning at the taste before tossing them somewhere behind him to finally settle his gaze on her exposed sex. 

‘Jee-sus baby,” Negan said huskily, spreading her lips and watching how her pussy spasmed around nothing, juices dripping down her ass and onto the mattress. 'Is this what Daddy did to you just by kissing you? Did I make you so hot and wet that I could just slip right in?" Rayne nodded, biting her lip. 'Answer me, baby doll." Negan ordered, gliding his fingers through her wetness as he laid down between her legs, getting a closer look at her glistening cunt. 

'Yes Daddy," Rayne replied, her normally quiet voice just as husky as his as she easily slipped under his spell. 'It's all for you."

'You're fucking right it is," Negan agreed, rubbing small circles on her clit and earning himself a hungry groan from Rayne that made his dick twitch in anticipation. 'And I'm about to make it even wetter." Without warning, he buried his face between her legs, stealing Rayne's sanity and composure along with it as he greedily sucked on her pussy, determined to take every drop. Negan growled, grabbing one of her legs and putting it over his shoulder to get a better angle, dancing his tongue all over the pussy he'd been aching for for so long.

Rayne could do little more than take what was happening, tears of absolute pleasure falling down her cheeks as she cried out, fondling her breasts as her eyes slid closed, moving her hips against his mouth to get more friction, something that only made Negan more greedier as he feasted on her pussy, not giving a shit how loud he was being.

'Mine," he growled against her, sucking her clit in his mouth. 'You're mine. You belong to me now."

‘Yours," Rayne affirmed. 'I'm all yours, Daddy..."

Negan continued sucking on her clit, slipping two fingers inside and scissoring her open, relishing in the sounds she was making the more he fingered her, flicking his tongue quickly over her clit. Rayne’s entire body shook, her back arching like a bow the harder he went, one hand fisting in his hair and the other grabbing the edge of the mattress.

‘Fucking hell,” she cried out, feeling as though she’d been set on fire from the delicious torture he inflicted on her. ‘More Daddy! Please more!” Negan laughed against her, sucking her clit once more as his fingers moved in a come-hither fashion.

‘You ready to come for me, Rayne-y girl?” he asked, biting the inside of her thigh, relishing in the keening cries he was rewarded with.

‘Yes!” Rayne replied, looking down at him. ‘Gonna come… mmm, just for you.”

‘Go ahead baby,” Negan ordered, curling his fingers harder. ‘Let it go. Let it fucking go for Daddy… say my fucking name and come for me.”

‘Negan!” She screamed, that coil that had been forming in her belly coming undone and her vision going white. Her back arched hard up, so hard Negan thought it would snap in two, his mouth latching back onto her clit and overloading her senses. Wave after wave she rode until finally it dissipated completely, Rayne falling back onto the bed in a shuddering mess.

It felt like an eternity before she came back to her senses, the sensation of a hand smoothing her hair out of her sweaty face and lips pressing gentle kisses to her face and neck bringing her back slowly. Her body jerked slightly as the hand that had sent her over the edge still toyed with her quivering pussy, a third finger working its way in. Rayne winced slightly at the sting of its invasion, but that moment of pain dissipated into that mind-numbing pleasure once more. Silver eyes looked up at Negan, who’d come up to lay beside her with an amused smile on his face.

'If you think this is good, just wait till Daddy’s fat cock is inside your pussy for the first time." he whispered, curling them ever so slightly to hit just the right place. Rayne whimpered helplessly, her eyes locking with his. ‘And when we get back to the Sanctuary, I’m gonna take you to Daddy’s room and fuck you again. Hell, I might just tie your ass up in there and make you my fucking toy to use every day." he continued, his free hand cupping one of her breasts and pushing it up to his lips, making Rayne cry out as his tongue danced around the stiff peak. ‘I’ll fuck you in every goddamn room of mine so that no matter where you go, you’ll think of Daddy. Long as you do what I say and _never_ fucking cheat on me, I’ll treat you like a goddamn queen." His voice was fading in and out, her brain too focused on his hand to even register what he was talking about. All she was aware of was that growing heat inside her, that familiar coil winding tighter and tighter with every tantalizing image he painted with his words.

‘Nobody else can do this to you,” Negan continued, his tongue tracing the shell of her ear as Rayne moaned loudly. ‘No one is going to be better than I am to you. Not even Sammy. That thin dicked fuck can only wish he had you squirming all over him like a little bitch in heat, begging for a cock in your pussy.” That edge was right there, her body wound so damn tight Rayne knew for sure she’d shatter any second. ‘But you don’t belong to him, do you?” he asked, Rayne shaking her head, teetering right on the precipice of her orgasm.

‘No, you belong to _Negan._ ”

She crested a second time.

Through the haze of her orgasm, Rayne could hear herself asking for more, begging even...

The jingling of a belt buckle coming loose, and a zipper being drawn down brought her back to the present, her eyes looking down as Negan shoved his pants down to his thighs, removing those experienced fingers and nudging her legs further apart. Rayne acquiesced, apprehension coming into her eyes as she realized what was about to happen now. She chanced looking down, seeing the size of his dick. She wasn't a prude, even though she was sure she seemed like such with her inexperience; this wasn't the first time she'd seen a cock having received her fair share of unsolicited dick pics in the past, but this one...

‘What?" he asked. 'It already looks too big for you?" Rayne blushed.

‘Yes," she admitted, looking away. He turned her face back to his.

'None of that shyness, baby. It'll fit, I promise. And if it don't, I'll fucking make it fit." He gripped one of her legs and pulled it up to his hip. Rayne got the message and wrapped her other around him, Negan's hands going to her hips. Rayne blushed even further at the look in his eyes.

'It’s alright, sugar," he said sensing her unease as he positioned himself at her entrance. 'I'll go easy on you this time." He pressed himself a little harder into her, slipping in slightly and making Rayne gasp. 'Daddy'll teach you everything, starting with how he's gonna fuck this little pussy till you can't fucking walk." Rayne squirmed against him, her cunt gushing more at his words. 'You ready, baby?" Rayne nodded, burying her face in his neck. Despite her saying yes, he could still feel how tense she was. 'You sure?"

'...Is this going to hurt?" she asked, clearly embarrassed to ask him. He kissed her gently.

‘It’s your first time, baby girl,” Negan explained. ‘It’s gonna hurt. You’re fucking tight as hell so… this is gonna be an extra tight fit.” Rayne nuzzled her face against him, bracing herself. ‘You gotta relax for me, Rayne-y girl. How am I supposed to get inside if you’re all tense?” Rayne released the breath she didn’t realize she was holding, letting herself unwind before him. One of his hands tangled in her hair, holding her there.

‘You ready now?” he asked again. Rayne nodded, hanging onto his shoulders. Negan kissed her forehead and, steadying himself with one hand, started pushing into her. Rayne cried out slightly when he reached the barrier inside her pussy, but otherwise didn’t fight him when he pulled out a little only to push all the way in.

Rayne cried out louder that time, tears pricking her eyes as her virginity was pierced away. Negan held himself still, moaning loudly in her ear.

‘Ow," she muttered as he pulled out and pushed back in, still being gentle with her despite his desire to ram inside of her. ‘It hurts… it hurts, Daddy.”

'Shhh," he crooned against her head, holding her to him as he continued to thrust inside her. 'It'll go away. Just focus on me. Focus on Daddy," Negan said, groaning at the tightness. 'Just relax and feel what Daddy's hard cock is doing to you right now..." Nodding, Rayne continued holding onto him, her breath quickening once again. True to Negan's word, the pain began to melt away into mind numbing pleasure, her body quivering pugnaciously as he ground into her, growling against her head.

'So fucking tight," he said through grit teeth. 'Too fucking long... it's been too fucking long since I've had a virgin pussy... Goddamn it, I love it when they’re tight." Rayne burrowed her face in his neck, nails digging into his shoulders. His smell and warmth invaded her senses just as his cock was invading her body, cocooning her in a world of bliss that she never wanted to leave much less end. The world was a wasteland outside, but in the moment, she’d found another, a better one...

'More," she begged sweetly into his ear, her breath tearing in and out of her. 'Please more..." Sensing what she wanted, Negan increased the speed of his movements, the hand buried in her hair jerking her towards his lips to kiss her fiercely, possessively.

‘Mine,” he said against her mouth, forcing himself into her harder and harder just to hear Rayne scream in ecstasy. ‘ _My_ woman, _my_ pussy, _mine_. You’re fucking mine. I’ll fucking kill anyone that tries to take you, fucking bash the skulls of those goddamn assholes if they even fucking look at you!”

‘I’m yours,” Rayne cried back. ‘I’m yours Daddy! I’ll always be yours!”

‘Good fucking girl,” Negan praised as Rayne keened under him. Oh, she loved that. ‘My good, sweet, baby girl. Such a little fucking cock tease…” He kissed her once more, sucking on her lower lip. ‘This is the last fucking time, you hear me? The last goddamn time… you ever play hard to get with me again and I’ll chain your ass to my bed and fuck you till there’s nothing left of this pussy.”

‘Never again, I promise Daddy,” Rayne said, her pussy tightening on his cock as one of his hands wandered between them to rub at her clit relentlessly, pushing Rayne to the edge.

'Say Daddy's name," Negan said breathlessly, resting his forehead against hers as she bathed his mouth with her hot breath. 'Mmm... say Daddy's name and come for me..."

'Negan," she said, kissing him again. 'Negan..." She repeated his name like a mantra, vision swimming as she neared the inevitable edge before her back arched hard into him once more, her cries turning primal as she came again, so hard that her vision went white and her ears ringing loudly...

Vaguely she was aware of the twitching of his cock followed by a warmth that burned her alive and marked her as his.

She collapsed back onto the bed, both of them breathless. Rayne's hands were buried in his hair, disheveling it as his did to hers, their foreheads touching again as they came down from their respective highs. After a time, her eyes edged open, silver meeting hazel. A small smile came to her face as she pressed a kiss to his lips, Negan returning it and nipping at her lower lip teasingly.

‘Did my Rayne-y girl enjoy her first time with Daddy?” Negan asked, holding himself over her as Rayne looked up at him, one of her hands coming down to stroke his cheek softly.

‘Absolutely.” She replied, still catching her breath.

‘I’m glad you did,” Negan answered with a smile, kissing her softly and pulling out of her carefully. ‘For an old guy I can still get down and dirty,” he laughed, rolling over onto his back as Rayne cuddled up into him. There was still a bit of pain in her belly, but it was manageable. Really, if she had to describe it, it just felt like a cramp, minor enough for her to ignore it.

‘You’re not that old,” Rayne noted, draping an arm and leg over him. ‘You don’t look like it, anyways.” Negan chuckled heartily at this, his free hand coming up to rub over her arm.

‘I’m only getting younger by the day,” he answered, pressing a kiss to her forehead. They stayed in thoughtful silence for a moment longer, listening to the rain as it continued to pour down.

‘So, what happens now?” Rayne asked, thunder booming off in the distance. ‘Wait it out or…?” Negan caught her meaning, glancing over at her with a knowing smile.

‘Already got you corrupted, don’t I?” he said, kissing her lips heatedly. ‘Give me about ten minutes and I’ll be ready to go again. Why don’t you bring that bag over here and show me what you got?” Rayne nodded, reluctantly pulling herself loose from him and sitting up, wincing slightly at the pain. Pushing herself up and off the bed, she walked towards her long-forgotten backpack, feeling Negan’s eyes on her the entire time and catching him staring once she turned around.

‘Enjoying the view again?” she asked, remembering what he’d said earlier at the Sanctuary. Negan grinned in response.

‘Always, Rayne-y girl,” Negan admitted, folding both of his arms behind his head and watching her walk back to the mattresses, sitting down cross-legged on it and setting the bag beside her. ‘So, what’d you find?”

‘The jackpot,” she began, joy filling her again when she opened the bag and pulled out the pallet she’d chosen earlier, opening it up to see the colors. It still blew her away that they were in such good condition after all this time. Rayne wondered just how vibrant they’d be once she put them onto paper, how much they would shine with any work she used them in, and just how many combinations she’d get if she mixed some together…

She must have said all that aloud.

‘No idea what the fuck you mean by “color theory” or “washes”, but I’m glad to see you smiling again, Rayne-y girl,” Negan said with a laugh. Fuck, she _had_ been talking out loud. ‘You really do love painting don’t you?” Rayne nodded, replacing the pallet into the bag and pulling out a book next.

‘Of course,” Rayne affirmed. ‘I haven’t in so long though I don’t know if I will remember, so I grabbed a couple books too.” She opened the cover of the flowery printed paperback, flipping through to see instructions on proper mixing techniques and the differences between wet on wet and wet on dry. Her silver eyes danced in the candlelight, her fingers itching to start painting again. Feeling his eyes on her, Rayne turned back towards Negan, noticing how close he was to her. ‘Thanks again for this. It… really means a lot.” Negan kissed her temple as Rayne leaned into him, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her closer to him.

‘Consider it an engagement present, Rayne-y girl,” he said, turning her so that she was straddling his waist again, her book long forgotten. ‘Now come over here and sit on Daddy’s lap. I got a seat you’re guaranteed not to fall off of.” Rayne smiled, biting her lip as she did just that.

They began again.

* * *

‘Damn it’s coming down hard,” Seth said, smoking a cigarette as he and Trevon sat in the doorway, watching the rain pour. They’d just moved all the bikes to the overhanging roof to keep them from getting wet when the heaven’s opened up, damn near drenching them all before they took shelter in the next building over. ‘Beginning to think that we should have taken a truck instead of the bikes today.” Trevon snorted at this, taking a drag off his own cigarette as he tossed his black dreadlocks over his shoulder.

‘Beginning to think Negan planned this out,” he mentioned, his blue eyes a sharp contrast to his dark skin tone. He blew out the smoke heavily. ‘Must really like that girl if he’s risked getting stranded out here in the rain.” Seth smacked him in the stomach with the back of his hand, making the older man cough. ‘The fuck was that for?” Seth motioned behind him, Trevon looking past his shoulder to see Sammy leaning against the window sill a few feet away, a faraway look in his eyes.

‘Poor guy’s been like this since Negan left with Rayne,” Seth muttered, casting Sammy a sympathetic look. ‘I know too well how he feels.”

‘A shame man,” Trevon agreed. ‘He really cares for her.” Seth nodded.

‘He told me about how close they were once,” The Korean man explained, taking another drag off his cigarette. ‘Said they were never a thing, but he really wanted to be more than friends with her. Looks like that’s not gonna happen at all now.”

‘Still, I feel for him. I remember Michela and her husband before Negan married her too. Don’t think I’ll ever forget how hard he fought to keep her from marrying him until they threw him down in the Hole.” Trevon remarked. ‘Last I checked, old Corey was out on the pike with the others. I don’t even want to know how Michela feels about that.”

‘Same with Josephine’s old man. He’s out there too.” Seth pointed out. The men were silent as Sammy continued to ignore them. ‘Think we should check on him? Looks like he could use someone right now.” Trevon nodded, leading the way as Seth followed behind him. Sammy didn’t even look up at their approach when they arrived beside him, only stared out at the rain with his arms crossed over his chest.

‘Hey bro, you alright?” Trevon asked, putting a hand on Sammy’s shoulder. Sammy glanced at him for a moment then nodded, resuming his vigil.

‘You know you can talk to us if you want,” Seth added. ‘We both get what you’re going through.”

‘I don’t get it,” Sammy grumbled, loud enough so both men could hear him. ‘I don’t fucking get why he has to do this.” Trevon and Seth cast each other a look before turning their attention back to Sammy. ‘Anytime he sees a girl that’s different from the others or catches wind that one of them is married or has a close friend or anything, he thinks its such a great game to take them away and break anything they may have had before apart.”

‘He doesn’t always go for the off the market ones,” Trevon noted. ‘Frankie was alone too I think.”

‘Tanya too. I think Josephine’s man was just a boyfriend, but they never really acted like they were together out in the open.” Seth added. ‘Everyone else was either married or in a relationship.”

‘And now he’s after Rayne,” Sammy growled, his fists balling. ‘He’s after her and he’s rubbing it in my fucking face that he’s going to get her one way or the other.” He planted both of his hands on the window sill. ‘Rayne’s been through fucking enough. She’s in a bad state of mind and Negan’s taking advantage of it. It’s not fucking right.” Trevon and Seth said nothing, only let Sammy get everything off his chest until he too grew quiet. The rain continued to fall until Seth finally piped up.

‘I guess this is the world we live in now,” Seth said wistfully. ‘Before, if two people were together, you’d only rarely hear that they were bring broken up by someone else. Now…”

‘Now it doesn’t matter if you’re together or married or what. You either lose someone you love to the living or the dead… both are just as bad as the other,” Trevon finished. Sammy laughed cynically at this.

‘Ain’t that the damn truth.”

The three men stood in silence, both Seth and Trevon finishing their smokes just as the rain let up.

‘We should probably get loaded up,” Seth noted as he headed for the door. ‘We both know how Negan is when it comes to sitting around doing absolutely nothing.”

* * *

Rayne sighed deliciously as Negan guided her hips up and down along his cock, pressing kisses against her neck and shoulders. There was pain, yes, but like before it dissipated the more he thrust into her and was replaced by that burning pressure that built up to a crescendo.

'That's it, baby girl," Negan praised as she ground her hips down into him, biting her lip hard enough to taste blood as her clit rubbed against his pubic bone. 'Ride Daddy's hard cock, just like that."

'Negan... Daddy..." Rayne moaned, her head falling back as he increased the speed of his thrusts. 'Harder, fuck me harder." Negan chuckled darkly, pushing her back onto the bed and covering her with his heavier body, effectively pinning her down as his hand snaked between them to rub at her swollen clit. 'Fuck!" she cried, arching her back.

'You about to come for me?" he asked gruffly in her ear. Rayne nodded weakly. 'Use your words, princess."

'Yes Daddy," Rayne answered weakly, almost drowning in the pleasure.

'Not until I tell you too," he reminded her, pinching her clit and drawing a cry from Rayne. 'That orgasm's mine, just like you are mine."

'Yours," Rayne replied, resting both hands on either side of Negan's neck. 'I'm yours.”

'Fuck yeah you are," Negan groaned, all but slamming into her now in such a way he was sure that he'd leave bruises on her ass and thighs. When Rayne's cries turned primal, he reared up and lifted one of her legs up to his shoulder, rubbing her clit harder.

'Say my name, baby," he ordered, faltering in his rhythm. 'Say it louder, say it so all those fuckers can hear who you belong to!"

'Negan!" Rayne screamed, breath tearing in and out of her lungs as she fisted her hands beneath her. 'Negan!"

'Come for me, Rayne. Mmm... feel me fucking you and come for me." Negan commanded. Rayne needed no further encouragement as she fell over the edge, her vision going white as she cried out. Negan followed her with a few quick thrusts, releasing himself deep inside his newly won fiancé. He breathed heavily, lifting himself up off Rayne when she squirmed uncomfortably under him. Her silver eyes opened after a moment, a satisfied smile on her face. Negan laughed in amusement as she struggled to keep them open.

‘You still in there, Rayne-y girl?” He asked, running the back of his hand down her face. ‘I just don’t know. It looks like you took one hell of a fuck.” Rayne laughed a little at this, managing to sit up slightly.

‘I’m still here,” she answered, kissing him lightly. Negan returned her kiss, slipping his tongue in for a moment before pulling back from her.

‘Good,” he said. ‘You took my dick like a fucking champ.” He patted her leg, untangling himself from her as he stood up to pull his pants back up, tucking himself away and re-buckling his belt. ‘Hang in there for me, baby. We still gotta ride back home.” Rayne nodded and stood up, brushing off the exhaustion in her limbs as she moved to grab her panties on the floor only for Negan to snatch them up.

‘Uh uh, princess. These are Daddy’s now,” Negan said with a smile, moving over to his jacket where he tucked them into the inner breast pocket. At seeing the look in her eyes, he walked back to her, bending his head to whisper in her ear. ‘Don’t worry; Daddy’ll get you some nice lacy ones later. Till then, you’re just gonna sit in your juices and Daddy’s come till we get home. Then I’ll lick your pretty pussy clean till you’re screaming my name again.”

Rayne shivered and nodded, her body already aching for more. He handed her jeans to her, Rayne accepting them and putting them on. Her bra was a lost cause, still laying in pieces on the mattresses along with a large wet stain tinged with red- evidence of her deflowering. Rayne blushed slightly as she pulled on her shirt and boots when Negan handed them to her. Finally, once her jacket was on and the candles extinguished, Rayne met him at the door with the pack on her shoulders.

‘Ready to go, Rayne-y girl?” He asked, bringing Lucille up to rest on his shoulder. Rayne nodded at him, tucking her hair back. ‘Let’s go then, kitten.” Negan held the door open for her, smacking her ass as she passed and making Rayne jump in surprise. He chuckled as she smirked at him, shaking her head as she descended the stairs, opening the door at the bottom for him this time and following him out.

As they headed for the entrance, Rayne cast one last longing stare at the store, burning all of it into memory. Silent as a cat, Negan paused beside her.

‘Anything else you needed?” He asked, wrapping an arm around her.

‘No,” Rayne replied. ‘I got enough to last for a while.” Hearing the longing in her voice, Negan pressed another kiss to her temple.

‘Don’t worry, Rayne-y girl,” he began. ‘You ever need anymore paint, Daddy’ll come back and get some for you.” She glanced back up at him, a smile on her face. ‘Let’s go, princess. I don’t want to get stuck out here any longer than we have been.” He rested a hand on the small of Rayne’s back, leading her out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SHE HAST BEEN DEFLOWERED! *brown bag* I questioned just how this scene was going to play out for a bit and played with different ideas to try and get into Rayne's head about what would finally be the reason she said yes. Honestly, I think she's realized at this point that it's kinda pointless to keep avoiding the answer, but most of all, I think fear that Negan would take away the help he's given her brother would be enough of a motivation for her because, in her mind, everything she does is for Parker. 
> 
> God... this chapter was hard in all the right and wrong ways. I haven't written smut in God knows how long and this just... ugh. I'm so happy to have gotten it out there so that I can get into the more depraved shit that's floating around in the notebook I've been keeping for this story. The things we do for fanfiction, right? XD
> 
> Also, I have a sneaky feeling someone might mention the underage drinking here, but I really debated for awhile about how old I wanted Rayne to be originally before settling on nineteen, then remembered that she said she though she was still nineteen. The way I went about it was basically leaving it up to everyone to decide if that's her real age or if she's indeed a little older. Personally, just given how she is, I want to say she's pushing 20 or 21. 
> 
> You all are absolutely lovely and it always puts a smile on my face to see kudos and comments. I was hesitant about sharing this story, but seeing how much all of you enjoy it is motivation to keep going. Thank you all for continuing to be awesome! \^_^/


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